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Calling all wives and significant others! 🥰

29 Posts
14 Users
112 Reactions
687 Views
Posts: 343
Managing Ambassador
Topic starter
(@bellaz76)
Prominent Member     London, Middlesex, United Kingdom
Joined: 4 months ago

Hi everyone!

Happy Christmas Eve Eve 🙂

 

🎄

I want to firstly wish each and every one of you a Merry Christmas and love into the New Year.

 

🧑‍🎄

It’s my first CDH Xmas, and also my first being aware of hubby's crossdressing. It’s been super-exciting shopping for the new lady in my life. I thought that off the back of the HUGE amount I have gained from being a member here (including perhaps it saving our marriage) I'd share a short message about my experience of being on the site as a 'significant other'.

I’ve gained so much love and acceptance from everyone. At times when I’ve struggled with aspects of Victoria's dressing, or when things just don’t seem to make sense, I’ve been able to seek advice from my new friends on CDH. We all sometimes need people other than our significant other to talk things through with. Many of us may feel lonely. If we can’t speak to our everyday friends and family about our worries and concerns, then they fester.

Being here, I have gained a huge amount of friends who understand. They've helped me to love and to be supportive, and that in turn has given me and hubby / Victoria a solid foundation on which to build.

Some of you may not be aware that there is a private area of CDH for wives and significant others. While of course we are free to join in with the rest of the site, we also have our own private chat group and forum. These are places in which we are able to gain support from one another.

I have recently been appointed as Crossdresser Heaven's SO Ambassador. I'd love other wives and SOs to sign up here so that they - and hopefully, in turn, you - can reap the same rewards as Victoria and I have.

An added bonus - wives and SOs get free upgraded membership!!

If your wife or SO is interested, then all they have to do is sign up in the usual way and select 'Significant Other' in the 'Relationship to TG person' dropdown.

There is usually not a day that I don’t check for new members. When I see that an SO has joined I send them a private welcome message asking if they would like to be added to the SO group and upgraded. If they do, then one of our managers will arrange this. Then they are free to browse and chat as they like.

If your wife or SO joins and you want to prompt me to reach out to them then feel free to message me ... or get them to send me a message.

I'm happy to answer any further questions via private message or in this thread, and hope to be able to able to greet some more lovely new members soon!

🥰

Hugs

Laura xx

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28 Replies
18 Replies
Managing Ambassador
(@ellyd22)
Joined: 2 years ago

Majestic Member     Norfolk, United Kingdom
Posts: 5175

@bellaz76 

Laura

Thank you for writing this.

You're a tremendous asset to CDH. It's a joy to have you here 🙂

Happy Christmas to you too!

 

☃️ ❄️ 🎁

Big hugs

Ellie x

Reply
Managing Ambassador
(@bellaz76)
Joined: 4 months ago

Prominent Member     London, Middlesex, United Kingdom
Posts: 343

@ellyd22 learnt from the best mentor Ellie…..who could that have been…🤔🤗xxxx

Reply
Managing Ambassador
(@melodeescarlet)
Joined: 2 years ago

Famed Member     DC/Baltimore, Maryland, United States of America
Posts: 1043

@bellaz76 Aww, gosh thank you! So very sweet. I just do what I can and....oh gosh, wait...you meant @ellyd22 ...yes...that makes more sense, now I think about it. 🤔

Reply
(@cdashley)
Joined: 4 years ago

Noble Member     Oshawa, Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1488

@bellaz76 I’m very glad you’ve found a place to have others to talk to about this. I can only imagine how it would be for all the SO’s out there. I’m very lucky to have an understanding ,supportive and even encouraging at times wife who has been amazing since I’ve come out to her. Yes we have had some up and downs about it but I get it 100%.  Thank you for being here and helping others work through these feeling for both sides . You’re an amazing person.  
hugs,

Ashley. 

Reply
Managing Ambassador
(@bellaz76)
Joined: 4 months ago

Prominent Member     London, Middlesex, United Kingdom
Posts: 343

@cdashley awww thank u Ashely and where is this wonderful supportive wife of yours ? I'd love to chat to her if she's on CDH too or if she would like to join she sounds like she would be a huge asset ❤️

Reply
(@cdashley)
Joined: 4 years ago

Noble Member     Oshawa, Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1488

@bellaz76 I’ll ask her if she wants to join. That is one of the reasons I came out to her sister as well. So she would have someone to talk to about it.

Reply
(@cdashley)
Joined: 4 years ago

Noble Member     Oshawa, Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1488

@bellaz76 hey Laura, my wife has now joined and is looking for some help with the site.

Reply
Managing Ambassador
(@bellaz76)
Joined: 4 months ago

Prominent Member     London, Middlesex, United Kingdom
Posts: 343

@cdashley amazing news - I have just messaged her now 🙏🥰

Reply
(@cdashley)
Joined: 4 years ago

Noble Member     Oshawa, Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1488

@bellaz76 thanks so much for helping out. 🤗

Reply
Ambassador
(@alexina)
Joined: 1 year ago

Illustrious Member     Fife, United Kingdom
Posts: 2158

@bellaz76 

I'll echo Ellie's thanks, Laura. You've brought another perspective to the collective.

Here's to you and Victoria 🍸

Allie x

 

 

Reply
Lady
(@gorgeousgwen)
Joined: 2 months ago

Estimable Member     Northamptonshire, United Kingdom
Posts: 56

@bellaz76 I live in hope

Reply
Duchess
(@liza4you)
Joined: 2 months ago

Estimable Member     MICHIGAN CITY, Indiana, United States of America
Posts: 73

@bellaz76 Laura, I wish I would have known about this board a long time ago, I am married to my lovely wife of 30 years and she has always had difficulty with my cross dressing, I love here very much and yes I have made the mistake of slipping something of hers in the past and yes rightfully I guess she gets mad, Even with my own collection its not the same, something about her scent on the clothing and the way she looks in it just drives me crazy and she thinks I love her cloths and not her, which is no where near the truth, she seems to be a little more forgiving and will wear mine (we are the same size) for a time and it gives the that something she has that I don't. I have always liked them on her even more than on me but I don't think she believes me so she tolerates it but doesn't share or encourage me. I don't understand what it is, so I cant really explane it to her. We have opened up or marriage to allow each other to explore our feelings. It really was not my primary desire. We have had a broad range of action/reaction throughout our marriage and something like this site would I am sure made things a little easier for both of us.  Sex I am sure is an issue that has a lot of conflicted feelings for everyone and we are the same. I have no doubt this is one of the things that has evolved to the here and now. I was not excite with the open thought in the beginning but the more I explore the more I find myself looking for other people with the same feelings as mine. I have always included her in my fantasy's even though we never went outside and it is something we still have not done, together we have tried but her desires and mine on this subject are not mutual up until the last 4-5 years we have a pretty normal sex life and that became less and less as time went on. we each started having our own dreams I guess and the tit for tat kind of takes over and probably for a couple years before the last couple the x dress play we tried just went away. She says she doesn't think I love her so I agreed with it for her and for myself. I don't think we will separate we are both a little too old for that but the spark is growing dim. I am not sure if she has had encounters at least not yet and neither have I but the desire is growing and there are times is seems she is not as happy as she thought she would be, I am finding the thought ever more exciting almost as if things have taken a kind of switch. I have a growing number of friends that seem to understand me and it feels more natural every day. I dress when I want but usually put if off till after she goes to bed or when she is working and I am off. not always and she is fully aware of it and aware if my surfing these boards and says she is ok with it. But I think see is feeling more like I am abandoning her in a sense or moving farther away from her and maybe i am. I don't know how to get her to read this forum and we don't have any friends that know our little secret so there is no one for her to talk to. I would love for us to share and for her to understand me because I do love here. I think if she could talk to someone in the same situation it would help but I don't know how to get her to sit down on the computer and talk about it. she is on the computer all the time, Facebook, X , game sites, you know the regular stuff so its not that she couldn't do it if she chose to.  She is a very steadfast and opinionated woman and doesn't like to be told to do something nor does she like to discuss things of a personal nature with anyone, How do I get her to talk or at least maybe look at the SO forum without upsetting her or is it too late to rekindle what we had and hope for the best, I have a feeling the more I explore the the more I will find and at best she will only go for the occasional fling. Which given the nature if my desires I seem to feel ok with that if its the only choice given but I think it will come full circle if I seem to be happier with this change than her. what would your advice be for me, and how do I get here to at least take a look

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Managing Ambassador
(@bellaz76)
Joined: 4 months ago

Prominent Member     London, Middlesex, United Kingdom
Posts: 343

@liza4you thank you for that open and honest communication , it’s clear you love your wife and I can’t say for sure what may or may not work for her, but honesty is the best policy I’d say. Maybe just tell her u just realised that there is an area on here for wives and wondered if she might like to explore it considering u have found the site wonderful for support and u wanted to offer that support to her too.  

she may not do it straight away but the thought will be there and you never know 🥰

Reply
Duchess
(@liza4you)
Joined: 2 months ago

Estimable Member     MICHIGAN CITY, Indiana, United States of America
Posts: 73

@bellaz76 Well Things actually went ok, she had her thing and she was ok and so am I. Not nearly as upsetting as I thought. We had agreed to allow each other the freedom to be who we are, I am free to pursue any relationship I choose without repercussions. She will not object to my dressing when I want. (I just cant curl up to her If I have my boobs in, anything else she is ok with, and if I want to wear them she can curl up to me, She said she didn't really like to have sex with me dressed but  I liked her to put something cute for me, I like a woman with something on -baby-doll or corset depending on my mood - She will wear for me when I want and will not object to me wearing what I want during (I don't ask for her to dress very often but sometimes its nice) and she will share my desires when I ask. we set boundary's on a number of items for our encounters (lengths of time and no go locations that kind of thing) And we both agreed to allow and share partners together and apart. I guess as long as emotions are kept at a distance it may just work. only time will tell. but so far she is a lot calmer and I have no negative feelings to deal with. I hope when I choose an encounter she will feel the same. We are both older and agree we would probably not seek to leave each other and would resign to stay happy or not. If it fails we haven't lost any real ground neither of us were happy anyway. We have both had our experiences in the past hidden and openly and with each other so only a few thing have changed but its been a very long time. Since we both feel willing to remain togeather at any rate we should at least give it a shot, it could be fun MY TURN!!!! 😍 😍 😍 🤩 😍 

 

Reply
Duchess
(@lujan2099)
Joined: 5 months ago

Reputable Member     San pedro, cortes, Honduras
Posts: 170

@bellaz76

I'm glad to having you with us at CDH, I wish to have the force to talk about me with my wife one day, 

I hope one day you can have the resources to create a Significant Others support group for Spanish speakers, my wife needs to talk with women just like you,

You are doing a great job as Ambassador, as CDs, we are so proud to having you in our side.

Hugs

Odeth

Reply
Managing Ambassador
(@bellaz76)
Joined: 4 months ago

Prominent Member     London, Middlesex, United Kingdom
Posts: 343

@lujan2099 id love to be able to chat with your wife - could Google translate work in this situation ? I know it's not always completely accurate but would be better than nothing x

Reply
Duchess
(@lujan2099)
Joined: 5 months ago

Reputable Member     San pedro, cortes, Honduras
Posts: 170

@bellaz76

Hi Laura!!

My wife is anti Technology, she doesn't chat , only by voices notes because of that..she didn't finish the school, only reached 5 grade locally, so this situation add another layer of complication...

First I need to have "the Talk" with her , at this point I don't know how she will react, after that,she has to decide what to do and think about it..

Hugs Odeth's

 

Reply
Managing Ambassador
(@bellaz76)
Joined: 4 months ago

Prominent Member     London, Middlesex, United Kingdom
Posts: 343

@lujan2099 fair enough , pls do private message me if I can help at all in your gearing up for the 'talk' I can never say how she may react but I can give tips on what I needed to hear / maybe what I didn't hear at first etc if it helps . One step at a time and then of course next steps come after x

Reply
Posts: 7792
(@aliceunderwire)
Illustrious Member     Near Burlington, Vermont, United States of America
Joined: 5 years ago

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year Laura!

Alice

Reply
Posts: 1502
Duchess
(@augustvaliant)
Noble Member     Long Island, New York, United States of America
Joined: 6 years ago

Thank you for all that you do for us here on CDH!

Merry Christmas!!

Hugs,

Autumn

Reply
2 Replies
Managing Ambassador
(@bellaz76)
Joined: 4 months ago

Prominent Member     London, Middlesex, United Kingdom
Posts: 343

@augustvaliant thank you for having me 🥰

Reply
(@valentina16)
Joined: 4 weeks ago

Noble Member     Worcester, Worcestershire, United Kingdom
Posts: 744

@augustvaliant @bellaz76 

Bit late to the party, but may I sincerely echo your comment Autumn which captures everything I would say in the simplest terms.

It’s sooo helpful and important to have an authentic GG-SO view.

Thank you

Valentina

💚

Reply
Posts: 6022
Hostess
(@fishingr8)
Illustrious Member     Montana, United States of America
Joined: 5 years ago

Hi again Laura and thank you for taking the reins of this group of wonderful women here as our Wife's and Significant others to help them to learn and understand us girls here on CDH.. You as a wife to a girl that's part of your life and mine as well you have reached out to her and she has mentioned she has chatted with you .. Thank you for the reach out to all the Wife's and hope more will show up to join the wonderful ladies here .. Thanks again ..

Stephanie Bass

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1 Reply
Managing Ambassador
(@bellaz76)
Joined: 4 months ago

Prominent Member     London, Middlesex, United Kingdom
Posts: 343

@fishingr8 thanks Stephanie, it’s so important for us all to gain the support , likewise with you all in too. Like the saying goes….happy wife, happy life!🥰

Reply
Posts: 445
Lady
(@andreauk)
Honorable Member     CAMBRIDGE, Cambridgeshire, United Kingdom
Joined: 7 years ago

Hi Laura, I am sure the Significant Others will benefit hugely from your support and input and I am also sure you will do very well in your new role. Having a place for the SO's away from the main forum is a great thing and allows you to help and support each other in probably the best way possible, away from the main forum. I am sure I am not alone in appreciating the input that the SO's can also offer the mainstream members and it is always lovely to have their opinions on some of the posts. All of us on CDH must always remember the SO's need as much support and friendship as the CD's themselves, if not more, the fact that they are here is a good thing, lets hope we can all help and support each other in the coming years....x

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1 Reply
Managing Ambassador
(@bellaz76)
Joined: 4 months ago

Prominent Member     London, Middlesex, United Kingdom
Posts: 343

@andreauk what a lovely message and understanding you have, we deffo have needs as well and it is so lovely to have a safe space to chat to others.  It is v quiet atm but am hoping it will pick up and will keep pushing the word out there , i love having the support of both SO's and also all of you wonderful ladies as well.  The world will be a wonderful place if everyone was as kind as those ive met here.  xxx

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Posts: 92
(@jennyphose)
Estimable Member     West Midlands, United Kingdom
Joined: 3 years ago

Hi Laura

Just to say thank you for this article and that I think it is so wonderful what you are doing in promoting the site out to the SO's out there that support us / put up with us / don't yet know about us....

We spoke recently on the Chat area, and you suggesting I point my wife towards the CDH site and the SO area - it is certainly something I'd like her to look at, so I will do that, next time we have a "check in" - I think if she knew more and could see that there are hundreds of CD's just like me, it may help her come to terms with things, and may allay some fears and answer some questions... The reverse is also true, she may have more questions for me as a result, but I'm hoping that I will be able to answer them honestly and openly.

Keep up being such an advocate and loving SO of your partner.

Jen x

Reply
1 Reply
Managing Ambassador
(@bellaz76)
Joined: 4 months ago

Prominent Member     London, Middlesex, United Kingdom
Posts: 343

@jennyphose oh sorry i must have missed replying to this, sorry for the late one.  

thank you for the kindness, pls do let me know if there is any questions your wife might have before joining herself happy to help in anyway i can, i am sure she would benefit from being here like i have, and also would be a great asset herself to others too!  Heart Up  

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