Welcome to Crossdresser Heaven, a safe and welcoming place for everyone in the crossdresser community.
Join Crossdresser Heaven today to participate in the forums.
So as I go down this road of CDing, and creating a more feminine outer appearance for myself and amassing a feminine wardrobe for those rare times that I get to dress, I ask myself what does my wife think. she knows, she's seen, we've even fooled around in the bedroom with me dressed. We talk open about it for the most part. But I can't help to think does she think less of me as a "MAN"? Who out there in GOOD relationships with their SO, and have been doing this for a long time, seen a change in how their SO thinks of and treats them? I have a very good wife and relationship with her but I wonder can I have my cake and eat it too can I go from time to time be Jenny and present in front of her without werry that as such I diminish the male side of me in her eyes to the point that one day she may realize I am not enough man for her. Any thoughts ladies?
I feel the same way with my GF, Jenny. She has been so helpful and supportive, despite not being really a clothes-shopping gal, but I still wonder what she thinks when I have a new going-out experience to share or a new package arrives. I want so much to talk about it first thing when I see her but I already feel like my very choice of clothing (usually semi-femme) is enough or too much for her when she gets home so I typically wait until we eat and talk about regular things a bit before sharing more. Even that can feel like I'm withholding, especially when we're rushed and I don't get a chance to share for a day or two ("oh yeah, I have like 7 Amazon packages arriving today through Tuesday"). I'm a firm believer in communication but even that feels hard when it seems like I may just be continually reminding her of my crossdressing when she may just want to talk about other things ... or just not that.
So, I don't know if any of this is helpful but I guess ask her how she feels about and perceives you when you're crossdressing first and be sure to tell her of your concerns since, whether or not she does have any disillusionment herself, it sounds like you may need to be at a place where you feel more confident. I'd also throw in a suggestion that you communicate about communication going forward and then keep doing it as often as and in the way you discussed.
I need to work on perhaps both of these things myself but thanks for sharing your concerns and I really hope it's something you can both work out in a way you can both be happy. Good luck, dear!
Soon after I met my wife she surprised me by showing up at my place. When she came in she noticed women's clothes lying about and was not pleased. She thought I lived with a woman and was playing her.
I decided to just come clean and tell her the clothes were mine. I wear them everyday at home and often to parties at college. She asked me to dress up for her.
I went in the bedroom, put on one of my favorite outfits including full makeup. When I came out she was stunned. She could not believe how pretty and sexy I was. She liked it. I became not just her boyfriend but girl friend too. We went shopping together, picked out clothes for each other and dressed for each other.
After not dressing for many years, she encouraged me to start again. She still likes it.
Hi. Great post. I used to to wonder what my wife was thinking about me as a CD’er. After years of marriage, I’ve come to the conclusion that what she thinks about me is largely based on what I think of me. In my woman mode, I share a confident, feminine, playful, sexy, happy, loving, vulnerable, sometimes vampy and multifaceted person with her. That’s not to say I’m not like this all the time, but amped up when in woman mode. I must admit that I sometimes ask her what she thinks about CDing but for the most part, I just enjoy the experience and love sharing Z with her. Z
Hey ladies, I saw this on my newsfeed and wanted to drop my two cents in the hopes it would encourage you! I am a "partner" "significant other" to an amazingly wonderful, handsome and beautiful man who crossdresses. I know he too has wondered the same things.... the reality is that when I see him or when I see the feminine persona I see the person I love. I see eyes who see me and love me wholly, how could I not love the same? <3 I think all relationships are unique and different....but the best thing about relationships is that the one you are in is your love story, and it is beautiful just like the people who are part of it. I don't really see gender when I see my partner....I see the person I love, the man I met initially and then the deeper pieces that also are feminine. I see the person who brings me a wet rag for my forehead when I have a migrain, the person who holds me when I've had the worst day ever, my safe harbor, the person I know intimately inside and out and who knows me. I know that when I need him to be strong he can be strong for me....it is to me at least irrelevant of gender or gender identity. He and I have talked about this exact thing.....how we see each other, and the pressures of gender conformance. It has really helped us both grow beyond where we were before. I would encourage you when you are ready to talk to your partner. Hugs to all 🙂
What beautiful commentary. Thank you for your words of encouragement. I hope all of us who have relationships with spouses/significant others can develop such a great perspective from both sides.
Hi Ang,
Wow you have such Wonderful Human Insight into your Partner. What an inspiring post. I have been a little shy Around my Partner lately. especially at bed time when putting on my bedtime attire. but I know this is just me and not her Thanks for the inspiration.
