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I have mentioned to my wife that I would like to go out as Roberta for the first time.She is not so sure and says that I am safer dressed at home.What I would like to do is have a break in one of the big city's in the U.K. I would like to change into my femme clothes in my hotel room.My wife and I could then go out as glamerous girls dressed up to the nines.The first hurdle would be the hotel staff?.What would they say if I checked in as a man and went out of the hotel dressed in girl mode.Would anything be said,is this a security issue?.The second hurdle would be passsing when out in the city.I could pass to s certain extent as I have a reasonably pretty face anf cutly hair but my wife says that I would have to be madeup expertly in order to convince.She is great at applying blusher,eyeshadow and lipstick at home but would this be enough out in the big wide world?.Hurdle 3 would be would be the possibility of being spotted by a gang of youths who would know that I was a guy in female garb and pick on me and run the risk of being beaten up.My ultimate goal would be a quiet day shopping with my wife en femme in somwehere like M&S,followed by a low key meal in a restsurant and then a show.I reckon that the reststaurant would be less problimatical as I am often mistaken for s woman as I have nice curly hair.This is very gratifying for me.Going to a show in a theatre or concert hal might be a significant problem with regard to going to the toilet.There is alwayd a much bigger queue for the ladies in theatres and what would be the reaction of the women in the toilet if they suspected that I was a crossdresser.Girls,your advice wluld be deeply appreciated.It would be great if I could achieve this and it would be my ultimate goal but I can see the reality behind the fantasy and I know that my wife would be unesasy about the whole business.
Hi Roberta,
I would suggest you start out slow, a step at a time. What I've been doing the last several months is going out partially dressed. (For me it will be long before I could really pass). That is, wearing some womens clothes, jeans, shoes, panties of course, and test the waters. See how you feel going out in this manor. It was (and still is) anxious at times. I have not done this overtly with my wife knowing, but she knows. I do see others react when they realize I'm wearing womens boots or shoes, but I just go about my business.
Second I would say, seek out CD/Trans friendly parts of the city to explore in, that is my next step I believe, as I plan to go out wearing a blouse of some sort, maybe even a bra underneath. This will lessen the chance of running into anyone unfriendly.
As far as hotel staff, if it is a big enough establishment, they may not even notice and I would not worry if they did.
Just be safe, and have a lot of fun!
Bravo!
I would really consider what your wifes feelings are on this. Your top priority is to keep the boss as comfortable and happy as possible. She gave you an inch, don't take a mile. I would totally abandon the idea if she's going to be "uneasy" about it. Just my 2 cents. . . Good luck. Mikayla
Go 4 it gurl!
Hi Roberta....
Your wife is uneasy about this.
I believe that you truly have to respect this.
I don't believe you would enjoy your day out if your wife was uncomfortable.
Hi. My wife would certainly be uneasy.She is a cautious person and inclined to be nervous in tense situations.
I’m more new to this than you are, and I haven’t been out yet. I’m going for a makeover in a couple weeks, and will be going to CD friendly places afterwards with a guide. I’m sure if you google your destination city for CD friendly locations, you won’t have any problems finding great places to go.
A thought I have is that you could both go for a trip, and do a dry run dressed as a dude. See how your wife feels about the areas you go. That would make her more familiar with the area, and that familiarity may help provide some comfort to both of you.
I picked up some mace in case I get into a tough situation. Not sure what the laws in the UK are for that sort of thing. But I’m sure you could find something to keep in your purse.
Seriously doubt a hotel in a major city is going to care about a man crossdressed. They probably see it all the time. I bet the staff would bend over backwards to show you support. Even if it’s pretending not to notice. Remember that most people don’t even care what you’re doing. A lot of them are silently supporting you. Most of the anxiety we experience is generated within ourselves. I’ve been buying makeup and other “female” things as stores for the last couple weeks, and everytime I have the cashier has actually been more friendly than the times I only buy male stuff.
Go have a great time. You deserve it.
Victoria
Hi Victoria
Many thanks for your lovely advice Victoria.I agree that anxiety is within ourselves.When I first started buying womens stuff,I was twenty one and very nervous.First item I bought was a pair of black tights from Woolworths.I was convinced that the counter assistant was giving me dirty looks.I got more and more nervoud with each purchase.However,as time went on my comfidence grew in leaps and bounds.Some thirty years down the line,I realise that staff in shops are not necessarily assuming that I am a crossdrrsser when I buy stuff.
Roberta i say go for it gurl. I too would that type of opportunity my makeup and wig still need perfecting but the thought of being in public as Kandy excites me good luck hope you make the decision to venture out
Going to friendly places will help but I find many are more bar/club then restaurant. Besides getting gas and casually passing my first interactions were hotel restaurants. I can charge to my room and I think hotel staff have seen it all. They have always been very nice. I also tend to go when not crowded.