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Hey lovelies! ❤️
I need some wig help.
I’ve always just worn my natural hair (short to medium length), but I’m finally ready to play with wigs... except every one I try either looks like it came from a Halloween store or makes my face look like I’m starring in a soap opera from 1983.
The ones I’ve tried either look fake or make my face look totally off.
What kind of wig cap should I be looking for?
Any magic styles that flatter awkward-ish faces like mine? 😂
Brands, shops, go-to lifesavers?
I want something beginner-friendly but still cute and believable. I’m open to anything—from classy to sassy!
Thanks in advance! 🥰
Mia x
Hi Mia!
To be upfront, I am just getting into wigs myself, so I defer to those with much more experience than me! My first wig was a cheap Amazon one (maybe $20?) just so I could see about the sizing, fit, look, practicing wearing, etc. So, yeah, when I tried to brush it and a couple of clumps came out, I wasn't freaking out!
Since then, I've bought one from Janet's Closet that I liked better. They are also very responsive and helpful, so that's always a plus as well.
FYI I also looked at wig brands & names, and then Google looking for reviews and photos to get more info.
Good luck! The best part is that if you make a mistake, it's relatively easier and cheaper to fix than with your own hair!
Hey Felicia,
Thank you so much for this! It honestly helps a lot just knowing someone else is figuring it all out too. I totally get starting with something low-cost just to experiment—I’m leaning that way too, so I’m glad to hear it helped you get a feel for things (even if it shed a little 😅).
I’ve heard good things about Janet’s Closet. I’ll definitely start doing some brand sleuthing and review-hunting too.
And yes! That last line is exactly the mindset I needed: less pressure, more play. 🧡
Big hugs,
Mia
@mialanieri After wearing inexpensive wigs for years I decided I needed more than a catalog and a mirror. I went to a local wig salon. The associate was a woman about 40 and when she asked what I needed I said "I'm a crossdresser and I need help selecting a wig".
She just said "Follow me" and off we went. These shops all have private rooms for those that want anonymity such as cancer patients. She showed me the different styles and types explaining them as we went. I learned so much more than I did just reading. Then she asked my budget and after looking at my face shape and skin tone she selected a few and took me to the room to try them on. It was such a difference from those I had always selected for myself based on the magazine models. Everything looks good on them and that's intentional. Not so with me.
After over an hour of trying on wigs I found one I liked and bought it. From that day on I had not only a good wig I loved, but a friend to talk to about wigs and styles. I bought another from her some months later but in the mean time I would bring mine in for "servicing". They would wash and style it for me. I would buy accessories such as wig tape, a good brush and comb and the like.
It was the best thing I could do. It was scary to admit it to someone but once past that it was amazing. Since then I've shopped a half dozen wig salons. Once my wife and I went in together and we looked around. The associate, an older woman, went directly to my wife of course. "Can I help you?" she said. I looked at her and said "I'm shopping for a wig". She said "I'm sorry, we don't have men's wigs" and I said confidently "I know!" After the ice was broken she helped me select one that all of us liked. It was a Saturday, the shop was busy and I wanted to see it in sunlight so I left the room and walked to the window with a mirror to get a better look. Of course all the women stared, but I didn't care. I bought the wig. That was 15 years ago and I still have it.
The point is that you will never get the best choice for YOU shopping online and in catalogs where someone made the best choice for the model To Sell That Wig. A good wig shop will help you find what's best for you. They want a customer, not a sale.
Thank you so much for sharing this. Your story honestly gave me chills... it’s such a reminder of what’s waiting on the other side of fear. I can only imagine how scary that first step into the salon must’ve been, but the way you tell it… it turned into something not just affirming, but even joyful.
I love that you found not only the right wig, but a friend and a sense of confidence that radiates through your words. And I really felt that moment at the shop with your wife, your “I know!” reply made me smile so big. That kind of self-assurance is exactly what I hope to grow into.
Mia
@mialanieri The first step was scary for sure. Basically the point was that buying online can be fun but we rarely find "the look". We most always find what they want to sell. Skin tone and face shape have so much to do with how a wig looks on someone and having that little bit of help is so vital.
I used to buy online because I loved how it look ... on the model, only to get it and not like it on me. With shipping and restocking that most charge it became clear that buying one nice wig and paying a little more and having that bit of help was worth far more. No buyer's remorse and instant satisfaction.
Cheryl, this is such valuable advice. Thank you again for sharing your experience!
I can definitely see how online shopping for wigs can lead to that "model vs. reality" moment. It’s frustrating when something looks perfect on a website but doesn’t quite fit our face or skin tone. I never thought about the fact that a little bit of expert help and the ability to try things on could make such a big difference, but you’re absolutely right.
I think you’ve convinced me! I’ll be seeking out a shop where I can try on wigs in person—sounds like the investment in time and a little extra cost will be so worth it in the end. No more buyer’s remorse, just joy!
Thanks again for the advice. It really helped me put things into perspective.
Hugs,
Mia x
@mialanieri if you want to spend the money I would suggest that you make an appointment at a wig shop there they will be able to teach to and make suggestions on what for wig is best for you
Abby
Thanks so much, Abby! I’ve been thinking about visiting a wig shop, and it’s reassuring to know they can guide me through the process. I might just treat myself and book an appointment soon. 😊
Hugs,
Mia
Of course I will! 🤗
Thank you again, Abby. I can’t wait for that moment when I look in the mirror and say… “Wow, Mia is there.”
—Mia
@mialanieri I do like wigs, but I also like my own hair my hair is currently cut in a chin length bob. I have an appointment tomorrow with the hairdresser ( can’t wait)
wigs are good because it fun for the choice of selection
Abby 
@mialanieri Mia, you'll never get the right one online, i bought two and was unhappy with both.
Gathered up the nerves to visit a wig shop ....i entered drab and just bit my lip, announced i was a crossdresser and was looking for a wig....the rest is history, the assistant was so helpful ...when we got chatting, she told me they frequently get CDs purchasing.
I'd have no hesitation making a return visit, life is too short Mia...btw, i brought my SO for a second opinion.....yours, might enjoy the inclusion also.
Best of luck, we all here look forward to seeing you with your final choice😘
Martina x
Martina, thank you so much for sharing your experience—it really gives me a boost!!
I love how you took the leap and just did it. It sounds like that moment of honesty with the wig shop assistant made all the difference. I’m definitely feeling more confident about the idea of going in and speaking up for what I need. And the idea of bringing my SO for a second opinion is a great one—we can make this a fun, inclusive experience together. 😊
I’ll definitely keep you all posted with how it goes. Thanks again for the encouragement and support, Martina. It means the world.
Mia
@mialanieri There is no magic formula to finding a wig that will work for you. Rather than wasting money buying wigs on line that you'll just throw away you're better off going to an actual wig store. Try on several in different colors and styles. You'll know when you hit the right one when you look in the mirror and say "that's her!"
Jennifer, that last line gave me goosebumps—“that’s her!” Yes! That’s exactly the feeling I’m hoping for.
It’s so tempting to just browse online and hope for the best, but you’re absolutely right—nothing compares to seeing it on your head, in your mirror, and suddenly feeling her looking back at you. I haven’t had that moment quite yet, but your words make me even more excited to find it.
Thank you for the encouragement—it means a lot coming from someone who’s clearly had that experience. I can’t wait for the day I get to look in the mirror and finally meet her, face to face.
—Mia
Hey Mia
I got my wig - the one you can see in my photos - after my first professional makeover. That was with Tracey Galligan at Femme Side Studios in Leicester last summer.
Before then I just had a couple of pretty unsatisfactory world-wide-web-wigs (WWWwigs) bought online.
Because I'd booked the full five hour makeover and photoshoot, Tracey had the time to sit me down and do a proper wig consultation. First a range of colours to see which suited me best. Then, once the colour had been decided, a range of lengths to find something that went with my facial shape. Finally, knowing the colour and length, a range of different styles.
As we went along we took photos so that we could scroll back through and find out what was working best. Believe me, lots of wigs really didn't. Some knocked 10 years or more off my real age. Others added that, and more 🙁
It was time-consuming but it was also great fun. At the end of the day we put in an order for exactly the same wig that we'd hit on.
I don't think I'd ever have found the right one otherwise.
By the way, I do actually have a full head of blonde, shoulder-length hair of my own. It's just that I can't get it to look anywhere near as good as the wig does!
Ellie x
Ellie, thank you so much for this—what a gem of a reply!
That makeover day with Tracey sounds like an absolute dream. I love how thorough and thoughtful she was with you, from color to length to style—and how fun that process must have been! The idea of taking photos as you go is brilliant. It’s so true, some wigs can be wildly unflattering, and others… magic.
Also, the fact that you already have shoulder-length blonde hair but still prefer the wig? That says a lot! Sometimes the structure and polish of a good wig just hits different, right?
You've inspired me to look into getting a proper consultation—maybe even make a little trip of it. Honestly, your whole experience makes me feel like I don’t have to fumble through this alone. Thank you for that. ❤️
Hugs,
Mia
@mialanieri hey beautiful I personally look online and you can get your face shape. You can get whatever look you want. They also have face apps where you can choose your hair. You can go into a gay wig store and they will set you up with many different looks. It does make a difference and it’s a great attribute to have
I’ve definitely been thinking about visiting a wig shop—everyone here has been so encouraging, and it really means a lot. The tricky part is that to truly see if a wig works, I’d need to go in as Mia… and I’m not quite there yet when it comes to going out as her.
Right now, I’m still using hair extensions. They look decent in photos, but honestly, they don’t feel great in real life. I know I’ll have to work up the courage to take that next step eventually—it’s just a process.
Thanks again for the support and advice, Michelle. It really helps more than you know. 💜
@mialanieri call them i first went in as man. There are plenty of gay shops and place you can call see if make you comfortable .
Mia, check out Paula Young wigs. I have several and they look pretty good. Most of them are less than 100 dollars. The human hair wigs are much more expensive but you get the quality if you want it.
Kerri
Kerri, thank you!! I just peeked at Paula Young’s site and you’re right, they actually have some cute options (I hope my wallet won't get panic, haha).
Big hugs and thanks again!
Mia ❤️
Try and find a shoppe that will help.Wig shoppes are usually very good and accommodating.I have a lady I go to here in Nj and it’s the best thing I’ve ever done as far as getting a look.
Thanks so much, Megan! 🥰 That’s super reassuring to hear. I think I’ve been a little nervous about walking into a shop not knowing anything, but it sounds like it might actually be the best move. If you don’t mind me asking, what kind of help did your wig lady give you when you first started? I’d love to know what to expect!
@mialanieri she helped with color,length and style.I switch back between dark brown and blonde.I think I look better as a chunky brunette!All stuff to bring up in a consultation.
That's fantastic!
I'll definitely have to overcome my shyness a bit to seek direct advice in a shop.
I need to be brave. 🙂
@mialanieri it can be unnerving for sure.Just realize these people are here to help you.I wish you were close to Nj I’d gladly go along with you!
Thank you for saying that. 💜
I think if I had someone like you by my side, I’d be halfway through trying on wigs already! It’s comforting to be reminded that the people working in those stores are there to help, not judge. Still, it takes a deep breath (or five), doesn’t it?
If I’m ever near NJ, I might just take you up on that!
Mia
Hi Mia. I have had an assortment of synthetic wigs (Grey, Black and Brown). Some good which I still have and some hopeless. Mostly I get my wigs from SHEIN for about $20 AUD although for those in the US - tariffs may cause some cost increases.
These synthetic wigs are of reasonable quality as well with an average crown of 58cm. Personally I prefer the longer wigs as then I can do some hairstyling with hair clips, bows, ribbons and scrunchies. These adornments add to my feminine look, I also prefer wigs with fringes or bangs that go partway in hiding some of my male facial features
I did get one from an on line store Wigspark and I sent it back so just be a little bit wary of on line purchases unless good folk on this site mentions them.
Cheerio Gwen
Hi Gwen! 💖
Thank you so much for sharing all that, super helpful! I’ve been so back and forth about synthetic wigs, but it’s great to hear that some of the more affordable options (like from SHEIN!) can still be cute and decent quality. I hadn’t even thought about using clips and ribbons to style them, such a fun way to personalize the look and add that extra feminine flair. 🥰
And YES to bangs! I think I might be in the same boat with wanting to soften my face a bitso that tip is gold.
Appreciate the heads up on Wigspark too, shopping online feels like a gamble sometimes, so knowing what to watch out for is everything.
Big hugs,
Mia x
@mialanieri Dear Mia, Thankyou for your lovely comments, We are all here to help each other.
Kind regards Gwen
You're such a gem—thank you! 💕 I already feel so much more confident just from talking with everyone here. It means the world to have this kind of support.
Big hugs,
Mia x
@mialanieri My own wigs are all from Amazon, and all <$30. I stumbled into the red one and that was pretty much that.
I've always used the nylon wig caps that were included with them. Some include a fishnet style, but that doesn't work well for my short hair - though it may for your longer hair.
If it's financially feasible, try a few styles out and see what you think suits you best. Don't worry too much about color because that's the great thing about them: they're as interchangeable as your clothes!
This is so helpful, thank you!! I’m honestly so relieved to hear you found cute options on Amazon without spending a fortune, that gives me hope! 😅
And oof yes, I’ve been side-eyeing those fishnet caps, wondering if they’re meant for someone with a totally different hair situation than mine, so that clears that up.
Also love what you said about wigs being as interchangeable as clothes, such a good way to look at it. I’m totally down to experiment now without putting so much pressure on getting the one right away.
Thanks again for all the great tips! ❤️
Mia x
I also have a pair I bought on Amazon for twenty-something dollars, and they've been great, so I used to rotate them. I finally decided to buy a fine wig from Keystone, and it was a fabulous experience, from fitting to buying and even more so wearing it at the Gala. The three are made of synthetic hair.
So it all depends on what you want. There are good options.
Gisela
Gisela, thank you! 💕 I love that you’ve had a good experience with both Amazon finds and a more high-end wig... that gives me a lot of hope that it really is about what suits your vibe and budget at the time.
Espero encontrar alguna que se ajuste a mi rostro. 🙂
Big hugs and thanks again!
Mia x
@mialanieri La encontrarás. You will find it. Testing wigs with the help of AI images is useful.
Cinnamon kisses,
Gisela
Mia, I agree with a comment above, Paula Young wigs. Sign up for their web site. Many times, during the year they do a two for one sale. It is the only place I have used.
Lynne
Hi Lynne,
Thank you so much for the recommendation! Definitely signing up for their site now.
It means so much that you took the time to share what’s worked for you.
Mia 💜
I use Paula Young too. In fact the wig in my profile picture is one of them. It works well for me & my old craggy face.
Michaela,
Okay first of all—stop it, your profile pic is gorgeous! That wig looks amazing on you, and now I’m even more excited to look into Paula Young. I love hearing what actually works for real people, and your vibe in that photo? Total inspo.
Thank you.
Mia 💜
Ah wigs yes, I have many and I don't think any of them are terrible! I used to always go for long curly wigs at first, mostly blonde and red, I have one black one that's my least liked wig, I use it when I want to go for a goth look or something like that.
However when I tried on my long, straight blonde wig that somehow was it! I found my main signature look! more recently I tried a blonde bob style I wasn't sure I'd like it but I did.
I guess what I'm saying is it sometimes takes a lot of trial and error to find THE ONE!
M. 
Michelle,
I love this! Thank you for sharing your wig journey! There’s something so special about that moment when you put one on and you're like, “Ahh, there you are!”
I really needed that reminder that trial and error is part of the fun, and not to get discouraged if the first few aren’t the one. Feels like such a creative space.
Sending you love and good hair days,
Mia ❤️
Curious for the people with multiple wigs--do you have individual stands for each of them, or do you store them in bags, boxes, or...?
Asking because in my situation (and probably others), I can't use stands, so I'm looking for the best possible storage method. The two wigs I have are mid-length, so while I'm not worried about tangles in really long hair, it's still a factor.
@felicianrb I keep two plastic heads inside a tall cardboard box at the top of the closet (no doors) so they're hidden from view. The top is left uncovered for ventilation. The third, which is one of the cheap ones, I keep in the plastic bag it came in, after carefully enclosing it in a fishnet.i hope it helps.
Gisela
@felicianrb Both! I just recently started using wig stands they do help keep the hair from getting too tangled! All my more favorite one are on stands! If you store them in bags or boxes gently shake them out first to straighten them. Before I put them on, I use a wig spray before brushing them, Start with short strokes at the bottom or end and work up, put the wig on straighten it, and gently brush it as needed.
But do try the wig spray for tangles it really helps!
M. 
I’ve got a stash of them and like you I’m not able to keep them out.
for me I’m constantly searching for that ideal wig - style length and color - which has been a bit elusive. But the search continues…
what I do is if I’m going out I will take out 3 or so candidates and hang them on a holder (usually I’m in a hotel at this point) that attaches to a closet rod. I’ll brush them out and use a wig conditioner and that usually gets them ready.
Miranda,
Thank you for sharing this. I totally relate to that ongoing quest for the perfect wig. It’s like chasing a mythical creature: part science, part art, and a dash of magic. Haha.
I love your hotel prep ritual too! That’s such a smart and intentional way to give yourself options and make it feel special. I hadn’t thought of using a holder like that on a closet rod, but now I’m absolutely stealing that idea (if you don't mind).
Thanks again!
Mia
@mialanieri not at all! That’s what these girls do here - pick up ideas we can use to enhance our experiences. I’m just very glad it was helpful
miranda 💕
Miranda 💕
I’m so grateful for this space and for girls like you who are so generous with your experiences and encouragement. It really does help, more than you know.
Mia ❤️
I highly recommend going to a wig shop and trying wigs inperson. A good SA in great and offering advice and makingnsuggesuptions for your face shape and skin tones. If you are at all concerned, call and ask if they work with CDs. The two shops I have been in were more then happy to help.
There are good wigs and there are cheap wigs, but rarely are there good cheap wigs. A quailty synthetic wigs is a good affordable choice. My first w8g was cheap, and it looked it. My next three were quality synthetic, and I was happy with all of them. I have not bought a real hair one, partly due to price, and partly because real hair is a limited resource and I prefer to leave it for those who need it.
Thank you so much for this... I really appreciate how grounded and honest your advice is. You’re absolutely right: there’s something so valuable about being able to try wigs on in person, especially with someone knowledgeable there to guide you. And I love the tip about calling ahead to ask if they’re CD-friendly—that small step can make such a big difference in feeling safe and seen.
Thank you again for sharing your experience... it’s helping me shape mine. 💛
Warmly,
Mia
BTW, trying on a variety of wigs is great fun. Even styles and colors I would never wear are fun to try just to see how I look. It was fun to be a long haired blond for a few moments even though it would never work for me.
Hi Mia.
I might be repeating what has already been said here, but a good starting point might be to look online and get a feel for the various types and styles of wigs that are out there. You'll bound to see something you like!
I bought my current wigs from Simply Wigs but they are UK based so might not be any good for you. I'm sure there are masses of other similar sites out there.
Maybe consider buying a synthetic wig, for starters, and see what you think. There are sooooo many styles available. They usually have a welted cap which has adjustable straps inside. I paid around £40 each ($50?) for mine.
I have two longish synthetic wigs that I wear when dressing at home, but I don't wear them out and about. When going out, I have two human hair wigs that have a cap made of a mesh material. These are my pride and joy and I treat them like the crown jewels. I only wear them when I go out. They are so comfortable to wear and, as you might expect, they look natural. However, the quality is reflected in the price, but I feel it's a cool investment.
Happy wig hunting! Have fun!
Judy.
Hi Judy,
You’re not repeating at all... every piece of advice helps, and I’m genuinely soaking it all in like a happy little sponge! I love that you mentioned starting online just to get a feel for styles. That’s exactly what I’ve been doing lately: scrolling through photos, imagining myself in different looks, and trying not to get too overwhelmed by all the options.
Simply Wigs sounds lovely, even if I'm not in the UK, it’s always good to know where others have had good experiences. And your breakdown of synthetic vs. human hair wigs? So helpful. I really appreciate how you’ve kind of mapped out the progression: home looks vs. “crown jewel” outings. That’s exactly the kind of insight I needed.
Thank you again. 💜
Hugs,
Mia
More expensive wigs have more expensive hair and you can feel the difference. I started with cheap wigs from Temu (for about £10) so as to find my style, but now I know what I'm looking for, I usually spend around £100-£200 and I look after them.
If it is really cheap and starts to frizz, throw it away and buy another, but the more expensive ones do well with a little care. Wash them fairly often in proprietary wig shampoo (some people use human shampoo, I can't comment on that) and a wig conditioner, which is important. Just wet the wig, spread the shampoo around and comb it through with a [very] wide-toothed comb or your fingers—don't rub, perhaps just squeeze gently. Rinse, apply conditioner and leave it on for five or ten minutes, rinse thoroughly. Comb through gently then dry on a wig stand, preferably overnight—don't mess with it until it's dry.
In use, try not to touch the hair with your hands as it encourages frizzing, makes it dirty and it will require more washing and since washing is a pain, you don't want to have to do it more often than you need to.
Unless it's specifically mentioned that it's heat treatable don't go anywhere near a heat source. Do not use curling tongs, don't light any BBQ's, and if you smoke, keep well away from a lighter—wig hair will be ruined with any naked flame, at the very least. Worst case, it will go up like a petrol fire. You can, at a push, use a warm hair dryer but any heat from these will probably alter the structure of Permatease (look it up), if the wig has any, so use with great care (or preferably, not at all).
A good wig will transform your looks and can turn a made-up man-in-a-dress into a very passable woman in seconds.
The style you require comes with experience and don't forget to experiment with colour—I was always a copper-coloured girl but my latest wig is blonde. I didn't think I'd get away with blonde but it's my favourite colour now.
Becca
Hi, Becca!
Wow, thank you so much for this! Seriously, your reply is like a masterclass in wig care and totally packed with wisdom. I really appreciate how you walked through everything from finding your style to caring for a quality wig. I had no idea about things like permatease or how heat-sensitive some wigs are—so that’s really helpful to know!
Also, I love that you gave yourself permission to explore new colors. I can totally imagine that moment of surprise when blonde suddenly felt right.
Thanks again for taking the time to write all that.
Big hug,
Mia x
