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Hello everyone. I have been dressing for about 30 years in private. Untill about 5 years ago, My wife did not know about it. I didn't even understand what I was doing until about 2 years ago. I think I am still really pinpointing what I am considered but what I like to do has not changed. I found crossdressers heaven while google searching for advice that I could give my wife. She knows about my dressing but really has not accepted it. I found a really good article on this site call a perspective from the other side.
I hope to find a lot more information on here that might help me work with her. I am still her husband. I am not interested in changing to her wife. But I like cross dress play. Hope to meet new people on this site who may have gone through the same things to see how I may continue in my wonderful life I have but with a little dress time added in.
Cindy.........Howdy and welcome to CDH. Explore our site, talk with the girls, who are always willing to help, maybe you will find the answers you need. I have been studying Female Psychology to find out why females respond they way they do...........making good progress and hope to make the results know in an article before too long. Anyhow....don't be a stranger, my door is always open....come on in...set a spell, and let's chat.
Lady Veronica
hello Cindy, that's my mothers name, GOD rest her soul. welcome to C.D.H. how to have your wife know about cross dressing is all about showing our fem side and to show what real woman go though. for her to understand it she would have to learn more about it by reading up on it. my wife knows and lets me dress up when 2 adult children are not home. but will not sit in same room and talk like 2 woman, i wish she would i try to talk to her but she will not listen but in time she will. she has seen me getting dressed up and putting on make up, she is learning what i know that it takes a lot to dress up and be pretty. i am a 28 waist person and slim. so if i try hard i can pass as a female, but never went out doors just yet. i went to a cross dressers meeting once and was all dressed up then my male cloths over them and went to meeting put on perfume and make up in my truck, heels and wig and went in side to meet others like our self s. i had a great time. just don't remember the day and time, the place is easy to get to but late at night 6pm to when ever the meeting ends. give it time for your wife to under stand cross dressing. woman cross dress all the time. they wear pants and shirt and sneakers and call it woman's clothing. woman do not dress like woman any more now days, so why cant we dress up like a real woman would and show it off?
You sound like so many girls here and many I have met over the years. I'm really amazed at how you and so man others have been married a long time and dressed secretly during that time.
My wife met Patty shortly after we met. I dressed for her after she noticed women's clothes in my house. She liked Patty. It actually enhanced out budding relationship.
We went shopping together, picked out each others clothes and dressed for each other. I became her boyfriend and girlfriend at the same time.
For those going through this coming out, I hope they can be as fortunate as me. Some are.
Hello Cindy!
you're more advanced in your path than me and many others. You can find out where I am here:
https://www.crossdresserheaven.com/forums/topic/hello-heres-the-story-of-emma-from-europe/
I've also found the article on the other side's perspective to describe quite well the situation my wife is in, although with different nuances.
hope to read more about it does evolve with you, and how you're making your way with her.
what I'd like to achieve for the near future, is the acceptance of me being allowed to keep exploring, reassuring her that I won't transition or make the thing known outside our house, although I hope she accepts I can go out to meetings with others. Let's see: it's hard to find the balance between putting too much strain on the couple/family and progressing. I find it also hard to keep the communication channel on this topic open despite her apparent indifference. I think she just want to bury her head into the sand.
well, it's complicated and some days, in the periods when my femme urge peaks, as now, I wonder why I'm getting my couple through this. I could just have just hidden it, and find another reason for doing that than being more feminine. But that would make my path fragile.
I'm not asking a lot (being waxed, having some weekends out when her parents come visiting), and I'm just asking for the right to do it; that doesn't mean I'll actually do that (although I think I would) because this is something that costs quite some emotional energy (and time) to do, and money.
Actually, I think that already the fact that she doesn't feel I'm doing it sort of 'against' her would be great.
Sorry for the mash-up of thoughts, but there are some many things one has to say that chosing isn't always easy...
Hugs from Belgium!
Emma
Thank you for your reply. I think knowing why she is acting this way is a very important thing to know. It might help direct me on how to communicate this with her. She has fears that I cannot seem to tell her aren't going to happen. I would love to chat with you and pick your brain on what you think might be happening here.
