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Hey everyone….just wanted to introduce myself. I am Lexi, a 32 year old m2f crossdresser living in Florida. I joined the site in January and have gone back and forth about posting but I recently had an epiphany where I realized that I am in fact a crossdresser and I need to own it and enjoy it.
I’ve been dressing since I was nearly 10 years old and I’ve continued to do it throughout my life, I just never reconciled what was actually going on and just passed it off as a phase. While I have dressed up many times I never had a wig and always was curious how it would feel. Game changer. I was at a large store this past weekend and saw a bunch of wigs in the Halloween aisle and I got the urge to try it.
When I saw myself in the mirror with the wig and some basic lip gloss I almost started to cry. There was a flood of emotions but I realized what I had been denying for so long. I felt beautiful and so feminine and I loved it. It felt so right and as I was looking at myself in the mirror I realized this is who I am and it makes me feel so good.
Having the ability to dress as Lexi is great for my mental health, and while I’m not sure what took me so long to realize it, but becoming her makes me a better man if that makes sense? I feel so at peace and honestly a lot of my angst was due to lying to myself for so long. Shame, guilt, feeling embarrassed. Lots of emotions but for some reason, seeing myself in a wig, I felt like myself, and I adored that. It clicked.
Sorry to ramble but I am so lucky and excited to be able to take part in such a great community. I can’t wait to be one of your sisters and I will likely be leaning on many of you to guide me through questions and concerns. Thanks so much for reading.
Hey girl, welcome and congratulations! Self acceptance is the first major hurdle! Hope you find here what you're looking for - be it tips or info or friends!
Say 'hi' if you see me around the chat room 🙂
- M
Thanks Melodee!! It’s been a long road but I feel so comfortable with it now for whatever reason. Lucky to have you all!
Hello Lexi welcome to CDH I am glad you have shared a part of who you are. Having found us you have made the step to become part of a family that is welcoming, understanding, compassionate, and supportive. While we are all similar and have many of the same desires we all differ on our goals or level of public expression and or personal experiences. I encourage you to explore the many forums, topics, polls and member biographies found here as there are a wide range of members all over the spectrum of feminine expression from differing levels of crossdressing to those on the path to transition and those that have. There are also links to websites that have products and services that may help you on your own personal path of self acceptance and expression. Ultimately it is a place, home, or space were you can feel feel comfortable and confident in who you are that you are not alone and this is a place where you can feel safe to express and share part of yourself as being who you truly are as your authentic self of you being a man, a woman, a man who dresses as a woman, if it makes you a better complete human being expressing your feminine desires feelings and or qualities. I am happy you are here and have made a choice to accept this part of yourself as self acceptance is the most important thing you can do for yourself and others. You can’t expect others to accept you if you don’t accept yourself all of you. As you are sharing a part of your authentic self here on CDH it ultimately lifts some of the burden that you may be feeling which many of us have carried for what seems like a lifetime you are not alone. Being here helps not only yourself but helps others gain acceptance and confidence. I can relate to what you have shared and it is amazing what a wig can do to the overall appearance you are at least a good 15 years ahead of where I was when I choose self acceptance I am happy you have made the step to be here. Welcome!
Hugs April
Your words mean so much April. I am so happy to be here and it makes me tear up knowing so many girls have walked this path before and are so supportive. Thank you so much, it really means the world to me.
I wish I would have found CDH years ago, but ultimately I am happy I did better late then never. Ultimately we are who we are and crossdressing has made me a better man too. It gives me balance and happiness. I share what I can here because I do not want anyone to suffer with who they are not a minute longer than they already have when self acceptance can bring a huge relief knowing that we are all special and better people for it.
Welcome Lexi
That’s a great story. I can appreciate the revelation of a wig.
I used to be excited about heels. Then realized adding matching skirts and tops or a dress seemed like enough. Finally like you, I tried the wig. What a feeling!
Next was makeup naturally. Getting the complete picture right (close at least) is so gratifying and special.
Enjoy it all.
Lizzie
Hi Lexi,
Welcome to CDH.
Alice
Hi hi Lexi
I enjoyed your writing and understand similar feelings you have. I am Stephanie and Stephanie is me. That realization comes together with emotions that have been buried for a long time. The feminine part of me is Young immature and finding herself like any young girl but in this man's body which is different than navigating just being the young girl. I am at the same time old and young feeling pretty and realizing it's not so, loving all the dresses and skirts and things hanging in my closet and realizing there's almost no room left for any of my mail clothes. And not realizing how that occurred but there it is. I so love dressing and being in public and being seen and passing, that everyday that I do not have to dress and drab is a wonderful day. I do have some friends who I still hide from and regret that I do.
I value their friendship and I have anxiety and fear that I will lose it if I dress in them for them or with them. This is a sadness I feel.
However I recently went to a doctor's office in skirt, dark pantyhose and open toe shoes with painted toenails. Sitting in the waiting room and being anxious with the other patients there and pulling at my skirt and keeping my knees together! When the nurse finally called me in and did the usual way in and taking blood pressure and so forth no comments were made no tells were observed and I felt completely accepted as Stephanie and I was thrilled.
So perhaps I will find the courage and to introduce my self to my friend; perhaps the fear is just in my own mind. I sure hope so. Again thank you for sharing your thoughts here with us girls!
Welcome to back to CDH. the feeling and denial are common. Just come out na enjoy. Ladies here are very supportive
Welcome in! You will bring a fresh approach as you have been watching our “fishbowl” a while. Now dive in. April says it all, and so eloquently. As you see we are all here to support and help each other. Isn’t it just wonderful when you are embraced with the fog? We all wish it to go on and on.
Thank you Lorraine! I’m loving it here so far, everyone has been so sweet.
Vimala,
I agree completely the lady's here are very supportive and I love you all!
Welcome, Lexie! Happy to hear your story and that you're discovering more about your feminine side and your masculine side!
Hi Lexi and welcome. I am sure you will find all you need here to help you along. No you have had the lightbulb moment keep it shining.