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Hey gurls, Danni here...

10 Posts
9 Users
12 Thanks
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Posts: 2
Lady
Topic starter
(@danni73)
Active Member     Bordentown, New Jersey, United States of America
Joined: 3 months ago

First post.  What to say.  Still working on my bio, so I don't want to duplicate that, but I can't reference it either...  But. I finally feel like I have a safe enough space to really open up to others, so here goes nothing...

Hi there.  My name is Daniel, Danielle, Danni, Dan.  I identify more as home-closeted gender fluid.  I hope that is ok.  I came to this conclusion pretty recently.  Ok, some backstory cause the bio isn't there.  I knew I was different around 14.  I am 50 now.  Yep, took a while.  It was only in the last few years that I figured out that one can decouple assigned gender, current biologic gender, gender identity, and sexuality in order to really define who they are without being constrained by a few traditionally defined squares.  Yep, that was my doorway. 

Once I realized who and what i was, i then told my wife.  She knew I liked to crossdress because of an initial lukewarm experience between us a decade ago involving me dressing up, but because of the lackluster experience, I suppressed the urge again just like when my mom discovered my first stash when I was 14.  Sorry, bio will have more.  So, my wife knows, we have no kids, some of her family knows when she outed me at the start of a military deployment (can't blame her and her mental state at the time).  And now, you know too. Yay, you're in the club lol.  Today, my wife is more settled with it, we communicate more, but she is not that interested in furthering my feminine side.  I don't hold it against her, like I said, we talk. 

As for wanting to be more girly... I am a more logical and scientific mind by nature so being an artist and blending colors, contouring, and applying makeup is not well developed in my wheelhouse.  And my hooded eyes don't seem to help either.  I tried growing out my hair during covid, but once it starts getting long, I get banana curls, and because I didn't know how to maintain it in an androgynous way for my fluidity taking into account a receding hairline, I decided to cut it short again and go the wig route.  I have masc days mostly, but I have my fem days too. I like to be pretty, but I also like to be handsome, depending on the situation and my mood.  Yard work days are always masc days lol.  But silky fem underwear, painted toenails, and other small rebellious details keeps my urges mostly sated these days.

Well, that is a little about me.  Sorry its so long and perhaps psychoanalytic, but I am here to open up with like minded people.  And I am sure we all have similar stories to share, albeit maybe not in a "hi there" intro post. So hopefully I make some friends here, maybe meet some friends that are local, and maybe even make it out for coffee in fem mode one day.  Well, i feel i need to let that political landscape quiet a little again or at least find some people who know where to go to be safe.

Until next time gurls!
Danni

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9 Replies
4 Replies
(@lauren114)
Joined: 7 months ago

Prominent Member     Connecticut, United States of America
Posts: 576

@danni73 Welcome Danni!  There are certainly like minded people her.   This has been a great place for me to open up and I think you will find the same.  In my case, I have said things here that I have never said to anyone before and it has helped me to better define and understand myself as i go forward in life.  Enjoy the community here!

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Guest
(@Anonymous 93000)
Joined: 4 months ago

Estimable Member
Posts: 121

@danni73 Hi Dani and welcome to CDH, you will enjoy this friendly community!

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Ambassador
(@ellyd22)
Joined: 8 months ago

Famed Member     Norfolk, United Kingdom
Posts: 2002

@danni73  Hi Danni

Welcome to CDH 🙂

Thanks for posting such a full intro!

I've just done a search of the member directory and found 652 CDH members in New Jersey. Hopefully some of them will get in touch ... and you may even get to experience that cup of coffee 🙂

By the way, if you want to search the directory yourself then start by clicking 'Social' in the header bar. Select 'Member Directory' in the drop down menu and you'll be away.

Meanwhile, it's lovely to have you here.

Hugs

Ellie x

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Guest
(@Anonymous 93000)
Joined: 4 months ago

Estimable Member
Posts: 121

@danni73 welcome! I’m very new here as well and don’t have much advice except for the banana curls.

I never let my hair grow out due to the curling. I was/is a stoner metal head and wanted long hair but was always embarrassed of the curls. During Covid I just let it grow out, as it does it’ll grow past your ears and neck straighter. I still have a few curls at the end of my hair but with each trim it’s less and less. 

I’m also dealing with the receding hairline but at this point I’m keeping it long.

 

Vicki 

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Posts: 405
Baroness
(@chrisfp99)
Honorable Member     London , Kent, United Kingdom
Joined: 12 months ago

That's quite an intro Danni! Let me just say for now that you've come to the right place. This is such a safe and supportive environment. We all have a slightly different take on the subject but you'll always find the girls here helpful and chatty. I too struggle with my makeup. I know what you mean about the damn hooded eyes!

Hugs, Chrissie xx. 

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Posts: 448
Duchess
(@lucyb112)
Prominent Member     Staffordshire, United Kingdom
Joined: 1 year ago

Hi Danni,

Welcome to CDH. Wonderful intro by the way.

You’re definitely in the right place. This is a very welcoming place.

You’ll find lots of different stories here, some of which will be pretty similar to your own, but we’re all very friendly and love to chat.

Lucy 

 

 

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Posts: 6781
(@aliceunderwire)
Illustrious Member     Near Burlington, Vermont, United States of America
Joined: 4 years ago

Hi Danni,

Welcome to CDH.

Alice

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Posts: 1093
Baroness Annual
(@d44)
Noble Member     New York, United States of America
Joined: 4 years ago

Welcome to the group Danni! Lot of ladies here from NJ so you're in good company.

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Posts: 1728
Ambassador
(@terria67)
Noble Member     California, United States of America
Joined: 6 years ago

Hello Danni,

Welcome to our CrossDresser Heaven (CDH) site. So glad you have joined us here. Feel free to explore all that our site has to offer.

The Warmth, Compassion and Hospitality of our community members can be found throughout the site.

Please do make use of the forums and articles or public chat room and friendships offered here on CrossDresser Heaven.

At any Membership level, You can contact any of us via Private Message (PM). You can find that link on each member’s Wall under their Profile picture.

Also, you may find what you need from: The Help Center or our Ambassadors by using the links in the Top R/H Drop Down 3 bar Menu.

Here is a good link to review the membership levels and the privledges for each. Such as Private Chat (PC), Groups, Additional Photo Allowance, etc.

======== Link to our New Community Forums ====

https://www.crossdresserheaven.com/community/crossdresser-heaven-lounge/

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