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My name here is Brianna. I hope what I say next doesn't sound weird.
I was born male, and there is a part of me that wants to crossdress and that feels female. In fact, in some ways I feel more female than male; I find myself wanting to dress and look less like a man, and more like the woman that's inside me.
Unfortunately, I can't afford a female wardrobe, makeup, perfume, all the stuff that helps turn men into women. I need to lose a lot of weight. And I am in a situation where I can't really be me even at home b/c of family. Without going into details, I can't bring clothing, wigs, etc. home right now. I also have to be careful who I talk to about this and how I can go about exploring my feminine side, because almost all of my family are conservative Christians who think being gay is a sin and would certainly think the same about crossdressing and transgenders.
Yet, I really want to explore my feminine side. I'd love to do so, but I don't know where to turn.
I did explore it a few years ago, but reaching out to the transgender community didn't turn out well for me. I couldn't break through into the clicque. A major event happened soon afterward and my entire life came to a screeching halt; I've recovered, but have yet to reach back out to the local TG community. I'm not sure I ever will, after what happened a few years ago.
I live in a conservative city (many Christians, quite a few homophobes, some rednecks, very few of which are pro LGBT) with a small LGBT community that seems to be there and not there at the same time. There are no dressing services anywhere close, and I only know of one salon that would give 'makeup lessons' at nearly $100 a clip.
So, I'm here. Maybe I'm wrong about something I just said, maybe I'm wrong about a lot of it. I'm willing to wait for the right time to explore life a little bit as Brianna. I'm willing to go as far as considering transitioning, but right now would settle for living and presenting in public as my male self, and exploring Brianna in relative safety and privacy...until Brianna was presentable enough and knew how to be as safe as possible to go out in public.
Thanks for listening to me, and thanks for your time. I appreciate this website, and knowing I'm not alone.
Brianna welcome, your now part of a extraordinary place with many here to help, comfort and support you everyway possible. Your journey refects the experiences of many here. The lack of acceptance from all around you. Society and it's hostile presents, the dealings with family, friends and values that have been incrested in every day life . To understand these feelings and not having the opportunity to express ones self, hiding for all and totally alone. No nothing was wrong on what you have said, it's a way of a journey in trouble waters and I hope this place will soften your travels and a more peaceful journey will develop. Meet with our ladies and make friends with and that said you are never alone. Happy your with us q and looking forward to seeing you here. As one of your ambassadors happy meeting you and if you need anything please be free to PM me, love to help.
Stephanie 🌹
Brianna welcome to C.D.H. that is a tough live living in a community where you cant dress up. but hope you can find time to dress up and be all you should be. buying female cloths and hiding them from family members is a tough thing to do also. but you came to the right place for starters. us girls are very under standing and friendly. sorry wish i can help you out more in your situation, but coming to C.D.H is the first smart thing. welcome and hope you can read post and meet new friends and chat.
Hi Brianna. Welcome to CDH. I think I understand you rather well. I've been there. I live in an environment very hostile toward us. Fortunately I have found CDH and I am making friends who support me in my femenine journey. The girls are the best. They cheer for me. This place is full of useful information. Sharing experiences and ideas is very helpful. Nobody judges anybody. We respect each other. The girls of CDH have helped me to open my heart and express my feminity. It is true that I continue to live in the sam hostile environment as before, but my mind is stronger and I believe in myself. Now I know I'm not alone and it helps a lot. I'm sure something similar would happen to you. In my internal search, it was useful to fill the profile information. It was a catharsis. To my surprise, I deiscovery a few things. Enjoy CDH.
Gisela
Hey Brianna.
I can empathize with you. I'm married to a woman and we have 3 beautiful girls together, but lately I've been considering full femininity. My wife has no idea about my transgendered life. It would destroy her. Lately I have found varagesale as a good source for clothes and can partially cross dress under my work clothes and coveralls. I use my backpack to hide what little woman's clothing I have. I hope this helps you figure something out so you can get comfortable in those sexy clothes.
Best wishes,
Serena 👿💕💞
