Hi from a new membet.

hello Lindie , welcome to C.D.H. gee how to tell your wife is a touchy thing to tell  her. mine found out when she seen a pic of me in my dresser drawer that my daughter seen also.  it went slowly. she excepts my x dressing but has to be when 2 adult kids are out, i dress up and she knows for she tells me when i can do what i like to do. i was 1/2 way there when she told me.  i could not wait to x dress and feel like a female. like i tell all my friends, its like a switch, off with male mode and on with female mode, she takes over and dresses me from head to toe, and there is not stopping her. when all done i feel so sexy and feminine and wish i could stay this way for i feel more of a person and human.  the look and feel and smell of perfume and silky panties and pad and lacy bra and dress and nylons and heels is so intense.    for telling wife  well try watching a tv show about x dressers on Jerry springer and see what her reaction are and go from there. if she likes it maybe you can bring up something about you x dressing just once if she likes it then you are home free. but watch it she might not like it and u know what is next.  but don't take my word for it. some woman, wife's are OK with it and others are not

Hello, Lindie!   I'm pretty sure you'll like it here.  There's a lot to read and learn, and everybody seems really helpful.  They're also very friendly and encouraging.  P.S. say hi to the bunnies at the Bunny Park (I used to cycle past there all the time before I moved).

Welcome to the Haven Lindie
Have a good time

Sweetie , telling your spouse is tough and takes a lot of courage. If you have only cross dressed in the past and not currently crossdressing I would suggest not to open that can of worms and not tell your spouse But if you're a serious ongoing CD or dealing with gender dysphoria you should share it with your spouse. Because she is going to discover your secret sooner or later and that will not be pleasant.  In my opinion, the safest way to come out to your wife is to do it in couples/marriage therapy. If you are suffering dysphoria or dealing with gender identity issues you should be seeing a therapist for individual counseling. If you do have a therapist then consider discussing the idea about the best way to disclose your CD or TG issues with your spouse. Most likely you will invite your spouse to accompany you to see your therapist. While in the therapy session you will disclose to your wife. The therapist will act as your moderator and be able to answer your spouse's questions or help to moderate any conflict that may arise. This process will be the most healthy way to come out. It definitely works better than coming out 1on1 without the assistance of a therapist. And is your best option for a positive outcome. Nonetheless there are no guarantees

Hi Lindie!  First of all, welcome to CDH. I hope you find our site helpful and informative. I am so sorry that you find yourself in the predicament that you are in. Women are really good at ferreting things out so don't be surprised if she already knows something. One of the most important things about women that they cherish is truthfulness and not keeping anything from them. I have mixed feelings about going to a therapist together for the first time and springing that on her. I can guarantee she will not like it. If it were me, I would see therapist alone at first, see what they think and then decide on a get together with just her or with therapist too. You can bet the fur will fly if she knows your both going to a therapist together to discuss something but what you won't say till you get there. There are those spouses who going along with cross dressing but they are in minority. I wish you all the best luck and hope that it works out for you both. It seems the spouse will jump to conclusion you are having affair and she isn't good enough for you or you want to be gay....something she never bargained for. And women will always attack......when they feel threatened.

Hugs and Good Luck.

Lady Veronica

Hi Lindie   welcome to cdh here with these lovely ladies help is here for the asking. Sorry to hear about your spouse each relationship is different and for some a strong relationship sometimes overcomes such hardships, may  be in time things may get better I only hope it does. Welcome to the sisterhood. 🌹

Hi Lindie and welcome to CDH.

Telling your wife or girlfriend about your crossdressing is a big but important step to take. As others already have stated, mutual trust is very  important in a marriage and the reaction to not being trusted upon is often stronger than to the issue itself.

There are three basic possible outcomes to the revelation.

1. She may be totally opposing the thought of your dressing and immediately seeking divorce. Sadly this seems rather usual.

2. She may accept you dressing under given premises provided she doesn't have to see you dressed.

3. You may be one of the lucky few that happens to have a wife that embraces and welcomes your female persona and offers you help and advice to explore your femininity.

Hopefully you have some idea of the most plausible outcome. And be sure the reaction will be stronger the longer it take's before she realises.

You can read about me coming out to my wife in my profile page. We are basically at the acceptance without encouragement stage but I  think she may slowly come to terms with my dressing as I have made clear I won't stop and I don't hide my clothes any more. I don't think she knows the extent of my outings though and she doesn't ask me about it.

Please let us all know how it goes and feel free to contact me anytime.