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Hello
I quick little bit about me.
I'm 54 and still remember vividly the first time I put on a pair of my sisters knickers at 5 years old.
Since then and now I've hidden my crossdressing from the world and sometimes even myself. Throughout most of my life words like transvestite had huge negative implications and were considered deviant and wrong.
So that's how I felt about myself for most of my life suffering depression and self doubt.
Thankfully that's all starting to change and recently I realised you really only do live once and so I took the plunge and told my wife I crossdress.
There's been ups and downs but we're still together.
I'd never pass as female and while I'd love to experience being outside in a cute skirt I now realise I actually don't want to try to pass as a woman.
Yes I guess I wish I'd been born a girl but that is the road back to depression.
I want a world where people are judged on how that act towards others. How they dress or their sexual orientation is frankly non of my business or anyone elses.
I look at these huge lists of gender and still don't know where I fit yet.
Maybe it's a sliding scale. Most days I'm in jeans and teeshirt with just a pair of knickers hidden below getting the car washed going to work etc etc and then some days I'm in full on girl mode rolling around the bed in stockings and pink lace knicker dreaming of - well that'd be telling.
I accept others for who they are. A loving soul can have many covers. I don't want to label myself I'm me.
Sorry for the ramble
Lucy
Hi lucy
What a beautiful story. I would live to chat to you more. My life sounds so much the same except the marriage bit.
Chat soon
Love sammatha xx
hello Lucy and welcome to C.D.H. were us girls under stand and very friendly. we all have been there. i know what its like to x dress and want to go out doors but society is not ready for the x dressing world. so i am in the closet or in doors. yes x dressing does help with depression and anxiety, panic attacks. feel free to read my profile in the mean time look around and i added you to my friends list
Lucy, no need to hid and be alone no more. Here enjoy expressing your self with many same mined gals all here experiencing their love to dress. Beautiful place to get the help , support and make wonderful friendships. I too don't want to be label. Just let me be my self and be who I want as life is too short and we only live once. Very nice to meet you and look forward to seeing you here soon.
Stephanie 🌹
Hi Lucy !
That's not a ramble. That's a small series of snapshots. I think you conveyed glimpses of yourself quite well. You are in the right place. Take the time to read forum posts and articles. Get to know some of the awesome people here.
Welcome to CDH
-Hugs
Autumn
Your story Lucy will reverberate to lot of us. Nice to hear from a fellow Lancastrian. Welcome.
That's not a ramble Lucy that was a great intro! Welcome to CDH
Hugs
Amanda
Great intro Lucy, thank you.
Warm welcome,
Nikki
Hello and welcome Lucy! Loved the heartfelt honesty in your introduction. Enjoy the journey of exploration in finding who you were created to be.
That was very inspiring and heartwarming Lucy! It is very overwhelming and scary doing CD sometimes but we are here for you! Nice meeting you and hope we make you feel welcomed here!
Hello Lucy! I'm glad you're here.
It is a curious path, this gender identity thing. I realized consciously that I am not on the 100% Male side of the spectrum a few months back. What a realization!
Today I paint my toenails pretty colors. I shave from the neck down. I wear pretty underwear and tease my wife about how jealous I am of her clothes and shoes.
I came out to her and it did put a strain on our relationship. We are navigating that by intentionally communicating each day, aiming for 15 minutes face to face each day. I am watching for the silver lining in all things.
I'm on the broad highway (pun intended) with you and wish you nothing but joy, beauty, and affection.
Renee
Welcome Lucy!