How do I interpret this behavior?

Sorry, but this makes me so angry. There are people on here who would give their right arms to have an SO as accepting and loving as you, and this guy "trolls for attention?".

The only attention he should be seeking is yours.

Sorry. Rant over

Connie

xxx

I agree with Connie here. First and foremost is the commitment that each of you made to the other. You are obviously fulfilling your side if that by being supportive and, as it reads to me, encouraging to his desire to CD.  I am super lucky to have a CD that not only likes Trisha but wants more of her in our lives.  And I can say, beyond a shadow of a doubt, there is nothing I won't share with her. She has even asked me if I want to explore sexually, which for me is a nope, but just the fact that asked says volumes about her. And it sounds like you are doing the same.

I am sorry you are having to deal with this.

Trisha

Hi Barbie, I'm pretty new to the coming out thing. I'm trying to dig out of a 40-year pit I made in not telling my wife about the femme side of me. I may not be the best one to give advice, but here goes:

I agree wholeheartedly that being open and honest is the only way to navigate any relationship. We CD people are as diverse as society itself - some are happy to dress underneath their guy clothes, some feel like we want to emulate a woman's look and attributes as closely as possible, some want to transition, some are gay or bi but are so afraid to reveal the other side(s) of themselves because of ridicule or loss of esteem, career, marriage, church, friends. Some of us are feeling urges towards transitioning, but are fearful of what it will be like on the other side. If we are less happy or lose everything in pursuit of our perception of completeness or "happiness" would it be worth it?

So, your SO may have many different emotions rolling around in their head. It could be a case of "sexting" and nothing more, or your SO may want to experiment with their sexuality but afraid of what that would look like. You know your situation better, but you may want to consider an open, calm conversation with them about what they really want. If you are okay with them exploring this area of their sexuality, maybe offer a setting or way that is safe and that you both agree is acceptable.

Hopefully, you can get them to open up more fully. I applaud you for remaining open to your SOs exploration. Most times there is very negative response whether there is open communication or not. Thank you for sharing your story. It gives us a way to see into our SOs mindset more clearly and helps us not be so internally focused! Good luck, and let us know how you get on.

Hugs,

Brielle

I have definetly been feeling like this lately. Thank you! It is very upsetting that this is happening! I just got get it because I am 100% open to it. So I just don't get it. It makes me feel like I'll never be enough. It sucks!

I personally don’t want sex with a man even if him or I where crossdressed.

Hi.

I have a SO that is supportive of me dressing.

We are open and honest. Why? First it is hard to cover up a lie. Second of all what if your SO is with another guy and he brings home a STD? You should tell him if he is with another guy to go get tested for any type of STD as you do not want or need any problems.

The other reason is simple.... the couple that plays together stays together.... be open and honest it is the simplest and easiest way

Me too!

Connie

xxx

Perhaps counseling would help you both. I don't condone his behavior. He is so lucky to have a supportive SO such as your self. I hope everything turns out good.

Hugs, Liara

Personally, I feel you need to questions your SO’s motives and ask yourself.
Is it just attention seeking or acknowledgment/acceptance of their new identity,
Is the a question of seeking to identify and/or forefill a need,
Are they missing something at home.

You need to keep the lines of communication open but also be honest with your own feelings. Let your S/O know your feeling.

If this is to continue, maintain the need for safety for your both. But also be open and upfront.

Your profile does not indicate your age. How long have you been his fiance.

I believe the girls have given some great information for you. Any relationship is based on honesty and trust. You sound as if you are infatuated by him and happy to go along with his life choice and to explore his fantasies but within set parameters.

I am of the mind that you should be asking questions and maybe seek some counselling. 

I hope you find your answers and make a sound decision as this man could be your future.

My advice is do not let your heart rule your head.

Hi Barbie I have been a active crossdresser for the majority of my adult life I would go out to gay night clubs just to get the attention I wanted from we all call here trolls or admirers. I have never been attracted to men not even a tiny bit. But interesting enough I really enjoyed the feeling I got from men being attracted to me. I was single at the time and I did enjoy flirting but when it came to anything else that might be expected after them buying  me a simple drink. A simple no, not interested was not always respected. So I always referred to the bouncer as my dear friend. Your SO seems to be looking for affirmation from men. He may not be attracted to men at all. Some of us who have just started fully dressing up are looking for affirmation from anyone they can In so many ways we are like teen age girls looking for fun, experimenting with clothes and make up but do not fully understand  all the dangers of getting the attention from the wrong man. It is wonderful for him to have such supportive SO but there are definite rules and and commitments made when the both of you decided to marry. Barbie you sound like a very loving kind person and I do admire you for that. Your SO has to be honest with you. Some of us may have fantasies of being with a man only because they want to feel what its like to be a woman that is admired by a man Some things should always remain fantasies if you are expecting to stay married to loving and compassionate partner. Just the opinion of a life long cross dresser.

Stephanie

Hello Barbie You sound like a Wonderful Person... And You're SO..
Does Not ...Understand..how Lucky..
They ARE TO HAVE SOMEONE LIKE YOU..in His/Her Life...
They NEED TO FIND OUT WHAT THEY WANT IN THEIR LIVES...And so do You
I Hope what I say Here.. is Helpful.
Take Care..Be Safe.. Jessica 💕

Hi Barbie.  For most crossdressers you are a dream come true, I hope your SO comes to realize what a treasure you are.  What he is doing is just not right.  Open honesty and devotion to ones partner should trump everything else.  If you can't share yourself with the one you love, there's something wrong.

It has been said, and its true, that there is some  bi-sexuality - or at least bi-curiosity - among CD's....  It takes some a long time to realize this and to admit this to themselves let alone others.  And there is no shame in seeking some therapy and guidance, or at least talking through it all with you.  Regardless of whether that is the case or not... You Deserve to be treated with more respect than that.

I truly do wish you luck with this dear!!  Stay strong ❤

Stevie

I see many replies saying he's lucky to have you. That's fine, but I don't really think that's the sort of assistance you were actually needing with your post.

The plain truth is that CL is filled with CDs looking for and arranging sex with men. Many CDs use CL this way and "CDs 4 Men" is one of the most popular features on CL. This has been true for nearly 15 years.

If your SO is a CD and soliciting sex with men on CL...then I think you have the answers you need right there.

If it looks like a duck, quacks like a duck, it's a duck.

Protect yourself and don't trust him.