I'm in trouble

I so sorry to hear this. You must be so worried.  Try to be patient and not let your imagination run wild. We all work through things differently. I hope you find strength and peace of mind through this. Hang in there.

That sounds hard. Maybe for the next few days you could focus on her and make her feel special, maybe by doing something for her that you haven't done for several years. Give her a feeling of continuity with the past where she had no doubts about your sexuality or your feelings for her and the present which she finds more difficult.

Good luck,

Lauren

Hi Charlotte,

Give her some time sweety Thats all you can do.

You may have put a lot on her at once so let her process it.

Right now just stay calm I'm sure you did the right thing and if she cared enough to help you dress,I'm sure she loves you.

If you need us just shout.

we are praying for you.

Patty

Hi Charlotte, Teralynn here. My heart goes out to you. This happens to many crossdressing people who are honest about their crossdressing to their loved ones. Sometimes a rejection can be devastating. Even if you initially think that your loved one has taken it well and appears to be accepting and supportive, unless you are a mind reader then you never really know for sure. Also, even if a loved one is supportive initially, there is no guarantee they will always be that way.  I took note that she left the house and will not answer her phone when you call. It is next to impossible to reassure someone who will not even allow you to communicate with them. In the mean time, life goes on. You must face the possibility that you might lose her. For most crossdressing people this is their greatest fear. If I am honest with my loved one, will I lose them. That is always a possibility, but even if you did not tell, there is the possibility that your spouse will discover it by accident and you might lose them because of the hurt felt because you have been hiding this part of you. If you are like most crossdressing people, you have a need to express the feminine part of you and cannot stop doing it anymore than you can stop breathing. So be patient. If you have the ability, to text her do so. Keep the messages short and to the point. (I love you- I miss you- Could we please talk- I need to know why you left me) I am sure you get the idea. In spite of everything you try to do to save your relationship, you have to face the possibility that no amount of reassurance will bring her back to you. I do wish you well and hope everything works out well. If I can ever be of further service please feel free to contact me through this site and let me know how I can help. A post on my home profile page will get the fastest response. - Blessings

Hi Charlotte,    woman are hard to under stand at times.  sorry to hear about all that happened.   but first she buys you a dress, helps you with make up, has you pose in the dresses for her and tells you , you look pretty.   then mood swing she is the opposite of that.   my wife knows I dress up but only when our last son that is 22 years old and still at home is at work, wife will tell me I can do what I like to do. my wife has seen me dressed up and also getting dressed up. but will not help with make up or have me sit in same room as her.  there are times she tells me she does not like me to dress up, then times that she tells me I can dress up.   so I dress up when no one is home for hours. I am medically retired from open heart surgery at age 45 and now 56. so that is a long time where I can not work no more. but I do what I can to make extra cash. well hope all turns out good for you.

Hi, that is why , I can not tell my wife anything about my crossdressing desires. She probably will do the same. Sorry.

I am sorry to hear. That is tough to get conflicting messages from wife. No easy answers here

Alice Black

I hope that when she has time to process all she recently learned about you, she will realize you are still the person you've always been, and return.

I wish I could say more to you, as that is such a difficult and terrible thing to happen in your life.

There so much misinformation out there about this passion we all share here. One of them being that we are all gay, and I've had that question put to me too, as the circle of people who know about Amy seems to be widening, and like most here, I'm not.

Amy

[postquote quote=279241][/postquote]
Trust me, I have been.

The fact that she did show acceptance and encouragement is positive. As I am sure you are aware this can be very confusing for a woman, well for anyone! I am sure she has all kinds of doubts and fears and if she has tried to research online, well that can introduce a whole new can of worms!

Now that you are out to her I am sure there is a strong urge to indulge your new freedom, but remember, she still has a lot to process and if she witnesses you going headlong into a pink fog she may well be overwhelmed by it all and recoil. Now is the time to take things slow and keep talking. Remember to make her feel special, show her that you are still the same man she married.

I hope she comes home and things settle down for you.

[postquote quote=279261][/postquote]
As of today, again, she seems to be sort of coming around. She is ready "My husband Betty". She has commented on a couple of tings I received in the mail today. I'm giving her space but constantly telling her how much I love her.

I'm holding my breath.

Hi Charlotte,

I am glad to see your follow up.  I will say that giving her room to work through this along with being open and honest with all of her question may help as well as taking your time and moving slowly giving her the time to adjust.  Glad she is reading My Husband Betty.  I found it to be very helpful. Another thing that may help her is to join the Significant Other's group on here. My wife is a member and has found it helpful to have a place to talk with others, just like we do with each other.

Hugs,

Michelle

An update...

I have been doing all I can do, reassuring her of my love, answering any questions she may have, helping MORE around the house, not flaunting my dressing. Last night and this morning....so far she has calmed down and SEEMS to be a bit more accepting. I think the next few days will tell the tale. The more she reads, the more she understands.

I am taking her out to dinner tonight (if she's up to it).

I am being cautiously hopeful.

Thank you all for your support and suggestions.

Charlotte

Charlotte, I'm glad to here that! Take it slowly, use your instincts, and let her tell you what she wants next. Hopefully as she understands this better, the real CDing, not the fetish stuff that tends to be more in your face she will realize you are still the same wonderful man.

Amy