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Hi Girls,
I am so happy to have found you all. This seems like a comfortable and safe place for me to land. I hope to learn and get new opportunities to explore my inner self. Typical story, I have been at this for 60 years, and it does get more manageable; however, it's hard to make friends without outing yourself and having everyone you know find out. Yikes, !! I have a ton of friends and relatives that would be shocked. Oh well!! what they don't know won't hurt them. I wish to go out More. I've only done it a few times: a late-night visit to Walmart and a walk on the main street, scared someone would out me. But It felt invigoration and liberating. I hope to find a friend or two to do things with. You'd think it mihgt be easy in a liberal city that I live,,, but either i don't know how or too afraid to reach out. Any suggestions?
I am just running out of closet space, that's all.
Kristen C
@kristenc Hi Kristen! My name is Jen and I'm a new "girl" here, too! I have gone out dressed many times and love the looks I get from people. I've been told I have very nice legs "for a man" by a lady who saw me dressed while I was out one night. Have you gone out dressed before? I agree it's a very liberating, empowering feeling! Welcome to the site! Cheers, Jen
Hi Jen, Thanks for the short story; I may have to accept the same fate someday, "nice legs for a man," LOL. Maybe I'll get a better makeover and a better Wig next time.
Anyway, I will go more often, but be careful to go in safe public areas. Have you gone out in the daytime? Maybe for a long walk in the trails with Pink tennis shoes and leggings, a short wig, light makeup after a super close shave, of course, and mauve lipstick. I'm just planning, you can see.
@kristenc Hi Kristen. I went out today in my black mini-skirt and gorgeous, white cable knit thigh highs!! You can see my pics on my profile page as it is that exact same outfit. Where I could I get a pair of pink tennis shoes? Donald Trump sells pairs of gold ones, LOL!!! I went to DMV a couple of months ago in my cargo skirt which is a "kilt-style" skirt and green tights to show off my gorgeous legs!!! I absolutely adored the way people looked at me! I felt like such a cute little doll!!! I have a pair of low black sneakers that I like to wear with my cable knit stockings (I have the white pair that I'm wearing now and another pair of grey ones that are just like them). I think the contrast of my white, stockinged ankle against the black outline of the sneaker looks so sexy ;^> What are some of your favorite outfits?
Hi Jennifer, I think you're right. DT sells everything gold, LOL. But he doesn't get to sell the Pink ones we wear, at least not without a tariff. I get mine through TEMU.
My favorite outfit is a cute short mini skirt with some lace showing on the bottom and a black lacy top with a ribbon around the neck area. There are so many to choose from, though. I'm out of closet space.
Kirsten,
First off welcome to CDH!
There are various groups that have meetings in many places around the country and the world as well.
On the title pages of this site there's a three bar drop down. It's located on the upper right side. Located there are chat, photo pages social, place's, etc.
You can join groups with like minded people. Use the public chat. Friendship requests.
Just hang out in the bushes and see what's going on and where.
The biggest meet ups are at various events. Like Keystone Conference. And many others.
Welcome to the Pink Fog!
Fran 🥰
@kristenc I recently went out with some friends with painted nails for the first time. Eyebrows were raised! Should I start calling you (insert female version of my name here) was the cry! Oh, if only you knew I thought. Loved it, it keeps em on their toes & after the initial comments that was it. As you say, what they don't know won't hurt them & it gives us some fun in the mean time. Keep up the good work & keep em guessing! You will find us all very welcoming here so let your hair down (or pin it up) & enjoy the space.
Hi Sasha, Thank-you so much for the support and encouragement. I need that.
Yes, I'll let the hair go where I like it , depending on the day, of course. LOL
I liked the painted nail story.
Maybe I should do one at a time. I bought some clues on ones. I'll just do one, go to the store as normal, and see if anyone raises an eyebrow.
@kristenc Hey Kristen, I can guarantee you a few friends. Not to mention support and validation. This is such a safe place to share your girly side with. From your pics you look like a fun beautiful woman. I think you're going to fit in just fine girl. Lovely to have you with us.
Hugs, Chrissie xx.
Hello Chrissie,
I am so happy you wrote such a nice letter, I’m greatly encouraged by all the words people have said to me. I will keep watching for more suggestions. Ideas includes on how to be femme in public.
affectionately yours,
Kristen
I wish to go out More. I've only done it a few times: a late-night visit to Walmart and a walk on the main street, scared someone would out me. But It felt invigoration and liberating.
I presume that you mean dressing up more en femme in public.
You can dress in women's clothes very often if you don't do it completely en femme on every trip abroad. This gives you much more experience and you get more opportunities to test out ideas and strategies while at the same time being subtle, under everyone's radars.
Sure, it is a trade-off, but just look at all of the experience that you gain!
@harriette Hi Hariette,
yes, you assume right I was talking about dressing en Femme. Do you mean wearing women’s clothes in my own house I assume, I do that without putting on wig and make up is where women’s apparel all day if I’m not expecting company. but not going out without looking like a woman in makeup and wig, would I only wear women’s clothes out. nobody knows what I wear underneath of my regular clothes. ha ha
warmly yours,
Kristen
@kristenc No, I meant going abroad wearing all women's clothes, just not totally en femme. Doing so gives you lots more experience and practice and teaches you how to be more subtle.
Hi harriette,
interesting concept I might actually like that. I’ll have to get my passport ready, thanks I guess they don’t mind as much over there huh!
Hi, Kristen.
Yes, this is a comfortable and safe place and I'd add friendly and helpful, encouraging and supportive, fun, with just a hint of eccentricity from some corners 😉.
Most importantly, though, it's now your place and it's a pleasure to welcome you. I'm sure you'll love it here as much as we do.
In terms of finding friends in your area, I include the link to our, appropriately named, Friend Finder. You can search by location and, hopefully, see any members near you. Anything else you need, just shout.
Allie x
https://www.crossdresserheaven.com/meet-crossdressers-in-your-area/
@alexina thank you so much for the warm welcome and additional information, I greatly appreciate it, and I am grateful that you reached out back to me. keep the smiles coming and enjoy what we do.
warmly yours
Kristen
Hi Kristen
Welcome to CDH 🙂
'Comfortable' and 'safe' are two words which describe us perfectly. We're VERY different from most of the other CD sites on the internet. This is a genuinely supportive community and we hope that you'll feel very much at home here.
I was 59 before I came out to anyone, and that was after a lifetime of dressing. It was joining this wonderful place that made all the difference to me. I'm still hiding the fact that I'm trans from many of the people in my life, but I've told those that I felt NEEDED to know and each time I've done so I've been lucky enough that it's gone very well.
You say that you wish to go out more. Again, that's where I was a little over a year ago. Looking back at 2023 me, I no longer recognise myself.
Just since July of this year I've gone out fully dressed and made up in Leicester, Leeds, London, Milton Keynes and Manchester. I've been out in bars, clubs, restaurants and the theatre, each time with friends from CDH.
If you'd told me I'd be doing that fifteen months ago I'd have called you crazy.
Sometimes, you can get a good way on your own but just need that little nudge to get your further.
The love and support that I've found on CDH has been what's done that for me.
Hugs
Ellie x
@ellyd22 thank you so very much, dear for the encouragement and the vision of my future possibly. I am so glad this site has got some wonderful gals to chat with. I’m starting to feel at home and I needed your girlfriends to get through some doubts and still feel comfortable and worthy. I think I have met some local people soon through this site already, but haven’t met them in person yet. I hope to that way I can go out with them for shopping or coffee, etc. then I’ll gain some knowledge of people in places to go to for help on make up, etc. my first time going out a few months ago to Walmart and address was so thrilling and didn’t have a problem although I was very nervous. I think I passed OK, but I still feel not confident enough. I need to work on my facial features, but feeling comfortable in women’s clothes is what my first desire has been for so so long.
I recently met a couple new gals and was preparing to go on dates. one evening one of the girls called me on FaceTime she needed help with something. Well, I just returned from buying a dress and trying it on when she called. so needless to say, I couldn’t answer with my video. I told her so I didn’t. I really really like this girl and thought this could be the one. the guilt came over me so the picture I took of me smiling with a little red dress, is the one I sent her with an explanation why I didn’t answer with video, the quilt got me, and told her I was a cross dresser, thinking she needed to know in case this went forward. I don’t know what I was thinking, but I was being fair to her. if I would’ve concealed that fact that day we still would’ve probably been a thing. but her response was “you do you”. Since then, I’ve never heard from her mind you this is a professor in social justice and she’s very liberal so I thought why not reveal. well tells me that the world is still misunderstanding of why us men like dressing up in women’s clothes and looking pretty and feeling pretty once in a while there’s a rough world out there and I’ve been in man world for so long that no one ever ever knew and I’m 74.
hope I still feel pretty getting in this site, thank you all.
affectionately,
Kristen
@chlosm hi Chloe, it’s so nice to see you here. I accepted your friend request and read your wonderfully written profile. I’ve been there with those same thoughts of feeling and living as a woman. I decided not to make a transition. And continue to enjoy all of the things that women enjoy, especially the clothes and when in crowds, I find myself attracted to conversations with other girls. I’m sure they don’t have a clue, but I’m happy thinking what I think and go away accepted thinking that way. it would be a dream to find a woman that agrees with my thinking and helps me through that. But a man 90% of the time and enjoy that as well. at this point in my life I’ve have way too many friends and relatives that I don’t want to disappoint by coming out and telling them what I do and how I feel.
I’m happy with me being me, however I’ve recently found myself dressing up and finding places to go out at night, dressed as a lady, including some shopping spree times it is thrilling as I think I pass. I wish I could have a girlfriend to go do more than shopping with to go to A place to eat or have coffee looking cute. best wishes in your journey. We are always here for answers two of those difficult questions.
best wishes in your journey. We are always here for answers two of those difficult questions.
Affectionately yours, Kristen
i totally agree…this is a fantastic site and am so glad the gurls created it for us…..THANK YOU
Hugs
Amber
@kristenc It's wonderful to have you here Kristen! CDH is a very safe place with many like minded people to learn from and to share your experience and wishes. At one time or another, we've all be in the same place where you are right now.
When I started going out, one thing I realized quickly is that people are so into their own thing that they hardly ever notice others. While it was a big thing for me to be out as Lauren, people just didn't care or even notice. Just carry yourself confidently and dress to blend in and you should be fine.
thank you so much Lauren, that’s exactly what I notice recently, dress to blend in is a great response.
thank you so much Lauren, that’s exactly what I notice recently, dress to blend in is a great response.
@kristenc Hi Kristen and a belated welcome! Just catching up on all the wonderful chat and stories. Finding the CDH community has been a godsend, a truly wonderful place and safe haven for me. Just to know there are so many like me, and you, where we can openly talk about our "unique" lives without judgement has relieved so much of the anxiety we all feel. It's as if an enormous burden is finally off my shoulders just in finding a place with so many warm and loving people offering unconditional support and encouragement. Dressing and having a feminine self seems natural now. I don't fight it and don't question it.
Lana 
however, it's hard to make friends without outing yourself and having everyone you know find out. Yikes, !! I have a ton of friends and relatives that would be shocked. Oh well!! what they don't know won't hurt them. I wish to go out More.
Correction: What they don't know won't hurt you. 😉
I will address this issue in a different way because there are few mentions on how to meet more CDs in your neighbourhood.
CDH has a friend finder. Surely there are more members in Madison that may want to go out together. Safety in numbers, etc
On top of that, you might also consider starting, say, a MeetUp event in a safe, public place and see how much interest there is.
HI Kristen very nice to meet you and so happy you found and joined us girls here so get settled in relax and enjoy yourself here.. So as a new sister and family member you are welcomed with open arms into our home as well as yours now also.. Well girl with a wealth of knowledge and experience here to learn from do some looking around and do some reading of the forums and posts from so many ladies here telling there stories about there journeys down the femme road they are on in life.. Like when you get comfortable with us please join in with a story or two about the life and times of Kristen as she travels down her own girly path in life.. Now as for making friends here girl with so many ladies from all over the world to build long lasting friendships with and best of all we are just a simple click away from you .. So when you feel up to it please return to your profile page and fill in some more please as this is how we get to know you better thanks.. Once again girlfriend nice to meet you and hope to see you around for a chat sometime soon..
Stephanie Bass
Hi Stephanie, Thank you so much for the Warm and welcoming feeling. I will certainly be inserting new information as soon as I can.
Since I joined, I have felt more comfortable being el'Femme. It has taken so long to get to this point, and it feels great. Again, Thank You, sweetheart.
Kristen
Welcome Kristen, you’ll love it here. There are so many opportunities to make friends here, I know you’ll find girls in your area and I’m sure they’ll show you some nice places to get out. Don’t worry about a thing, we were all new once. When I first joined, I wasn’t sure I wanted to reveal anything about myself publicly for the same reasons you outlined. But as time progressed and I became more comfortable, I began to express myself much more. Enjoy yourself and have a great time
Hello Jennifer, thank you for the encouragement, is this greatly needed. I am getting quite thrilled to know. I have a support team now. so stepping out will be a little easier. I really need this from my psyche, dressing up for years on my own and now having a family to do it with is so rewarding. You are my family and sisters. I emailed a place for a makeover about four hours away, I’m thinking of doing that to see how I can improve on my make up. Then I’ll get more confidence to go out once in a while because it is so rewarding to just feel that comfortable in the clothes. I love .
affectionately yours,
Kristen
Hi Kristen,
Welcometo CDH. It’s nice to meet you.
Alice
hi Alice, Thank you for the welcome. I can’t wait to meet My new sisters.
Kristen
Welcome to CDH Kristen we're glad to have you. This is a very supportive community with a lot of lovely ladies here to help you through your journey.
Alexis Grace xx
Hi Kristen!
Welcome to CDH!
I think you will find the community helpful, encouraging and supportive.
Again, welcome to CDH!
Catherine
@catherine0918 thank you so much Catherine, I look forward to finishing my profile and information as well. it’s a busy month for all of us, but I will get there.
@kristenc You're welcome and if you got to it hope you enjoyed finishing your profile. 😀
Hello Kirsten,
Welcome to CDH.
Jessica
thank you so much, dear Jessica
I really feel welcome here, how was it Annette side of the pond? is it welcoming to have groups going out together?
not a lot in my city and it’s considered liberal in about 300,000, I’ll keep searching to meet people and go out with them for drinks and food and stuff.and just to chat mostly.
loving sister,
Kristen
@kristenc Sorry sister, but I'm the wrong gal to ask about groups going out as I've only ever dressed in secret. I'm sure some other ladies here might be able to give you a better answer.
Jessica
no problem I get it took me over 50 years to get to this point anyway,
but you are in the right place if you wanna get information a ton of girls out there little gladly help you. that I found out the first week and it’s working.
Hi Kristen,
It is lovely to meet you and I have benefitted greatly from this site too.
One thing you could do is use the friend finder and see if there anyone near you and send them a message. It is quite possible to meet in male mode the first time and keep meeting dressed for later. Of course not everyone is comfortable meeting but I suspect many would welcome contact. In any event the chat is a great way to get to know people.
Janet
