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I have been a crossdresser since puberty and an now on the later into the back 9. At this point in my life I have a few more opportunities to be Mikki. I don't get to be all of me too often, but if I did, I would love nothing more than to sit on the couch with calming music playing to sit side by side with my best girlfriend just shopping on line and giggling about things we liked. While I really wish that to happen someday in my life, in my dreams it can go one of two ways. I will only talk about one of them at this point. I believe that more than half the time girls like me find being dressed to the 9's, and having a girlfriend being the same, that it could get arousing if flirting subconsciously began. This is my confused part. If we find kissing and touching in our femme mode, a tad stimulating, aren't we in some way being bi guys? Granted we both love being feminine in our mode, but shit happens, rite? I don't know what the hell I am trying to ask. Just a tad confused. I would love to hear what you girls think. Hugs, Mikki
Hi Mikki,
My whole life I was confused because I had these feminine feelings that I would dress for, and all my fantasies were with women. I never fantasized about being with a man. I assumed that if I felt feminine, then I should be gay and attracted to men. If I'm not attracted to men, then this must merely be a fetish or just weird. I decided that it wasn't a "thing" if I wasn't following the formula or standard that was in my head.
Three years ago I began to explore my feminine side more, buying clothes, joining a crossdresser support group, going out in public, joining CDH. I learned that many trans or CDs MtF are attracted to women only. So I realized that I wasn't weird, I was just being me.
I was very lucky to have experienced an encounter with a woman who was accepting of my feminine expression and embraced it in intimacy. So I believe that I don't have to follow any particular path except my own. I've decided that the only way I might be gay is that I'm a lesbian. And I'm ok with that.
Hugs, Lorie
Oh Lorie that was a perfect response. You opened my eyes to a few things I did not consider. Thank you so much honey, Hugs, Mikki
It doesn't sound Bi to me Mikki, it sounds kinda nice.
Give her a kiss from me, that'll confuse her too.
Sally x
I like that, I'm in on that one.
I like that, I'm in on that one. Actually do not wish to confuse her, just entice, or tease.
Happy you had input.
You are most welcome. Thank you for your post.
I am happy there are girls I can talk to here. Hugs!!!!!!
Thank you for replying. I totally agree, Oh yes definitely attracted to women. Women are my inspiration to look as good, or hot, as humanly possible given my age, that ain't so hot. Hugs, Mikki
Lorie,
Guys who think or react in certain situations the same as girls, who enjoy dressing in girls' clothes but are are only attracted to girls are definitely "different"; but "different" isn't the same as "weird". We are "normal", subcategory CD. Or, as a popular self-help book from the late '60s phrased it: "I'm OK, You're OK".
Thank you for that. You wrote it well, and gently. Thank you for taking time. You gave me a better outlook on things. Hugs, Mikki
Hi Mikki, I have pondered this many times. I like Lorie was confused in my young days figuring I dress like a girl and had fantasies about being with guys I must be gay. I experimented sexually in my teens to see where I stood. I enjoyed fooling around with guys but was also very attracted to women. Another dilemma, now what? Well I just kind of let it ride and figured it will figure it's self out eventually.
Well here we are 40 years later and I still ponder this one. So here is how I look at it. I consider myself to be a woman so when I'm with my wife I figure I'm a lesbian which by the way kind of turns me on and since I'm a woman if I'm with a man that makes me straight.
So I consider myself bisexual, just a bisexual woman not a man. There now you're really confused right? You're probably sitting there going, WOW thanks a lot Heather! Lets put it this way.Are you happy? Is your girlfriend happy? Then who gives a damn? Enjoy yourself, life is to short to stress over stuff like this.You know what category you fall into? The Mikki category so quit worrying about this and be the best Mikki you can be.
Take care, Heather.
PS I'll send you my bill later. lol
Uh, ok! I think I get where you are coming from. I think.! IT was a fun read too! Thank you for your input. I am usually around if ya ever wanna talk. Seems we started out pretty much the same way. Hugs, Mikki
Mikki, I'm so glad you posted this topic for a lot of reasons.
From the replies, you're definitely not alone in how you feel, many of us are or have been a tad confused. I used to ponder this a lot and spent hours googling terms to try to find the one that described me. For a while, I felt like I needed to know which category I was on the gender and sexuality spectrum.
Years later, something hit me one day, and I realized that to me, it doesn't really matter. I am me, a complicated individual.
Some advice...just be safe physically and health-wise, be responsible for yourself and others involved, and think about the future in whatever you do. Life will only get more complicated, but live it the way you truly want to live it so that you regret less later.
