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A true story with a lovely ending

18 Posts
18 Users
35 Reactions
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Posts: 10
Lady
Topic starter
(@gwen495)
Eminent Member     Country, Victoria, Australia
Joined: 1 month ago

Hi everyone,  I have only  recently joined with this group as a new member and slowly navigated my way around.  I guess looking for friendship of like minded folk so below is my first post.

This is a true story with a lovely ending.

Many years back my mother often told me as a young boy that she wanted a girl, this was after the loss of my oldest sister before I was born and I was the 3rd child.

Overtime my mother’s comments no matter how innocent they may of been to her at the time, upset my young mind psychy and I have been crossdressing on and off for many years. Often months in between episodes and always in secret.

Now many years later and now retired, I decided to be open and truthful with my lovely wife who I have kept this all from.  After researching how to bridge this conversation I decided to not to apologies but be open and honest about who I am.

Well as the story goes, this did not go down well. Oh dear.  I was left sleeping by myself that night and in the morning our relationship was still very frosty, something worse than you would find at the polar caps. I was getting the non talking too, cold treatment would be an understatement.

As the day wore on I followed her into the bedroom where she was lying down visibly  upset and after a brief discussion she was in tears.  I was Bible bashed as crossdressing was sinful etc etc.  Eventually we did console ourselves and we did get back on talking terms.  But I was still in a lonely place and there was no way forward for me.

It was just after lunch the same day and we were both tired as neither of us got much sleep the night before.  But we were now back on talking terms I said to my wife I was going to have a lie down.

About 15 minutes later my lovely wife came into the bedroom and laid down beside me.  We spoke a bit more and she was able to ask me a number of questions about my Crossdressing to which I answered her honestly.  We even kissed and shared a moment of intimacy.

My lovely wife informed me she still has to get her mind around all of this but offered me some of her clothes as she no longer wears them.

The next morning she had a previously arranged appointment and upon her leaving she left me some female clothing to try on.  My Goodness I was so appreciative of her compassion and her empathy.  At first I felt like my world had just ended and now I am no longer in a lonely place.

lots of kindness to everyone,  I hope your day becomes brighter

Gwen Kisses  

(Gwen495)

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17 Replies
9 Replies
(@fabulous1)
Joined: 8 months ago

Reputable Member     Forest Hill, Maryland, United States of America
Posts: 145

@gwen495 Gwen, That is a lovely story. Thank you so much for sharing. Oh, and welcome home, sister. I hope you have many more stories to tell. I will be listening intently.

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Baroness Annual
(@conniech)
Joined: 2 years ago

Reputable Member     Fairfax , Virginia, United States of America
Posts: 232

@gwen495 A true story that does make my day brighter. I'm happy for you, Gwen. A wife with compassion and empathy , indeed.

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Ambassador
(@alexina)
Joined: 1 year ago

Illustrious Member     Fife, United Kingdom
Posts: 2198

@gwen495 

Hi, Gwen, thanks for sharing this with us, it's great to read uplifting accounts like yours. And what a lovely way to introduce yourself!

So you've not just joined the warmest, friendliest and most supportive crossdresser community you'll find anywhere, but also those lucky few of us with supportive wives and SO's, make sure you show her how much you appreciate her acceptance and that she's not lost a husband but gained an extra girlfriend 😊.

Oh, by the way, welcome to the family!

Allie x

 

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Duchess
(@mkat3874)
Joined: 4 months ago

Reputable Member     Northeast GA , Georgia, United States of America
Posts: 228

@gwen495 

Wonderful story.  I'm so happy she seems to be receptive. Be patient with her and continue to answer any questions she may have as she gets to know the rest of you. You may even find that ultimately your relationship is strengthened from this.  

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Duchess
(@loneleycd)
Joined: 5 years ago

Famed Member     Roland, Iowa, United States of America
Posts: 2157

@gwen495 Gwen, love your story, glad your wife came around to be more accepting. 

Don't be surprised if her attitude goes back and forth on your CD. Even your own view of yourself and where you want to go may change. For myself I started here 6 years ago wanting only to CD 1 to 10 times a month. Today I present as Cassie 24/7.

Cassie 

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Lady
(@kyrabrooke)
Joined: 9 months ago

Reputable Member     Montreal, Quebec, Canada
Posts: 148

@gwen495

Si Gwen, blessings to you both, and you, if wishing to express a little more prettiness, belle~jolie is the least of worries our world has. At best vista, it is clothes and make up. Example 19th cent. UK/France...pretty lace, satin, knee socks were chill and I've not gotten to the ladies yet !

Merci for sharing your story. At 1st I was unsure which path it might take, as I was a 4th son of 4 boys, 7 years younger than my cloest sibling, my Mom did want a daughter & suspect I have some boderline gene issues (no HRT yet)...I am very happy for you both, as this is about self-expression and 1000 other complex natural issues that are not designed to hurt people. Old ideas perhaps hurt but you aren't at fault for such; you have no fault, mere expression of a feeling that's authentic within you. Those long were dredged up to go after those whom were different.

Had my SO's as times began to shift not only accepted me but made it more fun and easier to be all of me, I am not certain of the result, although I'm strong willed, and just knew at a very young age I had femme features, tendencies despite those I didn't have. Your outcome is a wind of fragrant blooms, kindness in a time of wars & bigotry. You take care, j'adore, grand amour, Kyra ox

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Managing Ambassador
(@bellaz76)
Joined: 4 months ago

Prominent Member     London, Middlesex, United Kingdom
Posts: 363

@gwen495 awwwww how truly wonderful, I love your wife , she sounds like she's a kind and beautiful person. 
Although she , like you was scared she just wanted you to be happy ❤️ and now you are no longer in a lonely place 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

I hope you and your wife continue to grow together and get to enjoy this new freedom as much as me and my husband (another CDH member ) are doing . 

And if that gorgeous kind wife of yours felt like joining too , she would be very welcomed here like I was months back when I joined 🌈🙏💕 so happy you are here - sending hugs to you both 😍

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Duchess
(@rebeccaoh)
Joined: 7 months ago

Estimable Member     Oxford, Ohio, United States of America
Posts: 77

@gwen495 your post was a rollercoaster of life thank you for sharing. I can just imagine the crushing low that hit you both and many of us have been there. Contrast that with the absolute highs of relief, vulnerability, and joy I can imagine you had too. Great story

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Lady
(@jillannquinn)
Joined: 4 years ago

Noble Member     Reno, Nevada, United States of America
Posts: 627

@gwen495 Gwen, Welcome to your new home and congratulations on coming out to your wife and the happy ending. A word of advice if I may; don’t go crazy buying and wearing your feminine wardrobe every chance you get. Go slowly, at a pace she can handle so that she won’t feel like it’s in her face nonstop. I took it slowly and it helped my wife. Three years later, we went out looking at Christmas lights last month, with me driving in full on Jill mode! Makeup, heels, purse and wig, and we had a great time. I hope you have at least as much enjoyment with your wife as a cross dresser as I’ve had with my wife. Thanks for sharing your happy story!

Hugs, Jill

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Posts: 118
 Kate
Baroness
(@kayo)
Estimable Member     San Francisco, California, United States of America
Joined: 5 years ago

Welcome Qwen,

    Nice of you to share your experience with coming out to your wife, I like the happy ending! 🤗

Kate

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Posts: 7829
(@aliceunderwire)
Illustrious Member     Near Burlington, Vermont, United States of America
Joined: 5 years ago

Hi Gwen,

Thank-you for sharing your good news story with all.

Alice

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Posts: 2111
Hostess
(@cdsue)
Famed Member     Delaware, United States of America
Joined: 5 years ago

Gwen -

Thank you for sharing your story.

My story is similar in that when I first told my wife she was upset and we slept in separate rooms for a few days. She did come around to accept me dressing as something I could do when she wasn't home. She gave me some of her clothes that she no longer wore which I appreciated. As time went on and after many discussions we are a point where she will invite Suzanne to spend the day, we go for mani-pedi's together (she helps me pick the color for my toes) as well as shopping together. 

I hope your journey continues in a positive way. Enjoy and remember to give her a gift (flowers work wonders) along the way.

XOXO
Suzanne

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Posts: 471
Lady
(@krisburton)
Prominent Member     The Hub City, New Jersey, United States of America
Joined: 3 years ago

A lovely account Gwen - so glad it all worked out for you. My wife went through a period of adjustment too. Things were tense for a while but gradually improved. Now she is not only accepting but participatory up to a point.We now  realize that in our 40+ years together we have had any number of challenges and rough spots, but my crossdressing has proved not to be one of them. I hope the same for you.

Kris

 

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Posts: 1019
Duchess
(@gracepal)
Noble Member     South Carolina, United States of America
Joined: 5 months ago

What a great story. It just goes to show that although something can be a shock at first, when you think about it there’s usually an upside to the situation. Your wife giving you her discards made me smile. And so quickly too. Saved her a trip to the thrift shops!

Bottom line is that when you do a deep dive into crossdressing anyone has to conclude its pretty darn harmless. The pros outweigh the cons by far.

GP

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Posts: 2172
 J J
Lady
(@jjandme)
Famed Member     California, United States of America
Joined: 5 years ago

The only real problem with crossdressing is most people do not understand it, and we fear what we don't understand. Once most people become educated about it, it ceases to be a major issue.

Here I am only talking about dressing, not the broader issue of transitioning, which is an issue for some, but certainly not all crossdressers. As my wife puts it, "They are just clothes." One of the biggest issues always seems to be the "bible". I believe there are exactly two brief, and very tangential mentions, and yet it has been built into this major issue. The bible also says not to eat pork, and yet many religious people do. I do not mention this to make this a religious discussion, which is not allowed, but only to point out where a major misinfomation about dressing comes from. We simply need to let the world know that dressing is not a moral issue and that it is just a way of expression and inner peace. Once people are informed about such things the easier it is to accept.

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Posts: 1797
Baroness Annual
(@d44)
Famed Member     New York, United States of America
Joined: 5 years ago

Gwen,

First of all, thank you for sharing that lovely story. Just take it slow and keep the lines of communication open and you should be fine.

Secondly, welcome to CDH. You will find it a very welcoming and supportive place so enjoy your time here.

Fiona

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Posts: 3439
Hostess
(@ab123)
Illustrious Member     Surrey, United Kingdom
Joined: 5 years ago

A lovely story Gwen. There are so many reasons why we dress but it's when the need comes back what will happen. Your tale is an honest way to do this and then have that moment of reckoning then a show of acceptance. Of course this is early days and there maybe more conversations but at least it has started well.

I hope it continues so that it becomes the new normal to strengthen your bond and new horizons together.

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