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I have talked to a number of girls here and am wondering if having certain characteristics is a common thing that might be associated with being a cross dresser. Physical characteristics like less body hair, not much of an Adams apple, wider hips, or even small male genitalia. Then there are psychological characteristics like being less aggressive/assertive, more gentle/passive, and soft spoken. What do you think?
@maureen76 That is a great question l know one thing that Girls like me and you come in all shapes and sizes besides loving to wear beautiful feminine clothes all of us can’t stop the urge to dress and act like women we have all felt the shame and purged all clothing and feelings but it never totally goes away at speaking from my experience so I really hope all of us can embrace our beauty and feminine qualities allow yourself to be beautiful you deserve it.
@jasminejeffries75 Great reply Jasmine----perhaps I was trying to pigeon hole certain characteristics too much and forgetting the big picture of the joy that cross dressing can bring regardless----and you are so right about all shapes and sizes---and I should add characteristics
@maureen76 Physically, I'm not so sure this would be the case any more than a certain percentage of us having a certain eye colour.
I would hazard a guess that many of us would consider ourselves to be creative.
Anna x
@annaredhead Yes, after posting the question---I started to re-consider---since in retrospect, I see that you are probably right ---Also, I should have listed creativity or imagination---because I see that in all of you and myself---I like to write fiction which involves creativity
Trans people have existed for millennia. We're all beautiful and each of us is unique. Our one defining characteristic is that we exist. I don't think a narrower definition is possible or desirable.
/LK
I have talked to a number of girls here and am wondering if having certain characteristics is a common thing that might be associated with being a cross dresser.
Based on many stories and profiles that I have read on the forums, I don't think that it works like this.
Physical characteristics like less body hair, not much of an Adams apple, wider hips, or even small male genitalia.
I don't think that any one or even a group of physical characteristics govern our desires to dress.
The only thing that might set me aside from most men is my tall neck, similar to my mother's. Tall necks are associated more with females. It might even be taller than both of my brothers' too. That can't be the cause, though. How many of you have tall/short necks?
While I do have unusually small testicles, I recently had my testosterone level checked "just in case". Nothing unusual there. It may be difficult now to also have my estrogen checked, but we will see. Some CDH members have complained of having testicles big enough to complain about tucking.
My name is partly based on me being (used to be?), um, hairy, so I don't think that made me want to crossdress.
Then there are psychological characteristics like being less aggressive/assertive, more gentle/passive, and soft spoken. What do you think?
Previously, I have mentioned a popular survey on CDH that tries to let us know how male or female each of us are. My numbers were 49% male, 64% female (yes, I understand math well enough). Everyone else posted vastly different numbers, too, so no correlation there, even though that wasn't the purpose of the survey, either.
Many members recount having the desire or feeling the need to crossdress at an early age, such as 3-4 years old. I can't remember anything close to that age, let alone recalling a desire to dress up differently then.
Many members, including me, started dressing after some of our friends, families or peers have started to, let's say, pop off, so age is not a reliable marker.
Not everyone here grew up in a household that had unusual female influences, such as having sisters that dressed them up as living girl dolls. I have no sisters, at all, and no such influence came from my mom.
For me, there was never a long, drawn out, historical desire to wear women's clothes. It "just happened" coincidentally.
To be honest, I think that you are looking for something that doesn't exist. If a single cause did exist, it would have been discovered ages ago.
@maureen76 I think you can add be a loner, being a loner you can get trapped into like trying on fem to clothes around the house and before you know it your a crossdesser forever
@maureen76 don’t feel that physical characteristics can determine in all cases, the mental make up is most definitely in play. We have a soft side, calm, observant and many times passive. Outwardly, you can walk down the street, and never know that man you passed is a CD. I know combat marines, fighter pilots , tow truck and semi drivers, mechanics, and law enforcement sisters.
@missylinda Hi Lorainne, Yes, I agree---the mental aspects are probably more indicative of becoming a cross dresser that any physical traits might be
@maureen76 we are always trying to look at ourselves or one another to identify traits, physical or emotional, that might explain or at least be somewhat typical of cross dressers or people who view themselves as transgender. The problem of course is that for every example there are at least as many exceptions. All to often the traits themselves are little more than persistent stereotypes
@kimdl94 Good points Kim---it is too easy to make assumptions based on a few traits
How about creativity? The physical and psychological characteristics you mention might be helpful in developing an effective and convincing presentation or persona, but the ability to think beyond the boundaries of what is expected and explore the world from a new perspective seems to be a common thread.
@krisburton Great point Kris, creativity should definitely be part of any list of common characteristics --- because as cross dressers we definitely think beyond societal boundaries---
@krisburton Thinking 'outside the box' is what does it for me. I want to see what's possible not accept 'you are a male' as defining who I am or how I should feel
I do not think that physical aspects are a hindrance to wanting to dress. If you have the urge flaunt it and hasn't stopped anyone to express themselves yet.! Naturally having less of the attributes help to be convincing is a bonus but in no way a hindrance to wearing something feminine.
@ab123 Yes Angela, I wasn't thinking so much as a hindrance but rather as something beneficial and perhaps an indicator.
I cannot speak of the characteristics which you have mentioned. However, I have been blessed (or cursed) witha voice that is generally higher pitched for a man to the point that I am frequently misgendered by my voice, and have been since I was a teenager. I have also been told on many occassions that when walking, the natural swing of my arms mimics a style more often associated with a woman, rather than a man.
MacKenzie Alexandra
@ladymakenzie Hi Mac Kenzie ---that is something that I hadn't thought of---of course, in male mode it is sadly often made fun of--- however in female mode, It would be a great help --- I don't dare talk when dressed because no matter how I modulate, it is still a male voice --- you have something of a mixed blessing---hugs Maureen
I don't think we haev any common physical or mental characteristics in common besides our desire to dress.
Now a more interesting question would be, what characteristics do supportive GG's have in common. I always find that way more interesting. I have found they are more open, some have bi tendencies or are lesbian, and girly girls
@leah63 Leah, that is interesting and it inspires me to open that as a topic---Thanks---Hugs Maureen
Physically, I didn't/don't fit any of the attributes suggested. I am lucky to have a slim frame on which I never developed any significant musculature, although not so lucky to have large hands and feet.
I can certainly relate to the psychological characteristics though. I was the underdog all the way through school, the less dominant one in any friendship. I think that psych profile goes hand in hand with a lower testosterone level, which is where I see a key driver, at least for me personally. After all, exposure (or not) to it in the womb is a lot of what makes us who we are, biologically, in the first place.
I doubt testosterone levels would be the only factor, but you could imagine that with increased levels there would likely be a lot lower incidence of CD tendencies or feelings of desire to be feminine. That would also correlate well with the typical CD demographic.
Just my £0.02 🙂
@finallyfiona very good points Fiona----yes I think the psychological factors are more indicative then what I listed as potential physical factors. Perhaps caused not so much by a lower testosterone level but perhaps a greater estrogen level than most average men? Even though I had some of the physical aspects of men I also had more the personality of a woman --- there are definitely psychological aspects caused by estrogen in males as anyone in transition can testify to
Yes, good point, actually that would describe me as well. I guess once the T drops off you're only going to end up as feminine as befits your naturally occurring estrogen level. Which probably explains why now living as Fiona has been so easy and natural to move into and fits me so well.
@finallyfiona ---yes, and when your older like me, the T drops off for all men---I have definitely noticed all kinds of changes since I turned 65 or so --- some beneficial for dressing, some not ---I'm glad you are having an easy and natural time living full time as Fiona---you are pretty brave
I manage a team of about 20 technical people, all men, except two.
I sometimes think I'm a weak leader, as I always focus on brining people with me, and will rarely assert myself. I know some of my team think I'm averse to conflict. I tend to think that my sense of empathy in other peoples views is so overwhelming that I totally lose the sense of what I actually think.
Emma
@emmajones there is a lot of interesting stuff in management courses about empathy, willingness to support the team and taking into account others views. I don't think this is a weakness at all
@emmajones hi Emma----I also am pretty empathetic and definitely adverse to conflict--- arguing with people merely raises my blood pressure and no one's minds are changed anyway---I think that empathy and being adverse to conflict are usually good traits to have --although I can see difficulties if you are expected to lead--- however, remember if you are clever, gentle, but firm in asserting authority people often don't challenge
This is a very interesting question and not easily answered, and likely has many gacets to it. Like the diversity of us here, there is a diversity of answers. No doubt some intersex individuals have certain common charecteristics. Others have certain hormone variations that lead them to dress and/or transition, and they too my have certain traits, but I would say the majority of people who are just CD do not. These are people, mostly men here, but it may apply to women who like to CD, who are otherwise male, most often exclusively heterosexual and just like to dress. We seem to come in all sizes and shapes with no common physical traits, at least that I have noticed.
When it comes to personality, or pyscological traits...well, that may be a whole other topic.
@jjandme Hi JJ----I guess as with so many things in life---it is complicated as they say---I just thought it was a subject worth thinking about even if no firm conclusions can be drawn---thanks for your input---Maureen
I agree, I think it is a great topic, and the kind of question I like to think about from a biological/evolutionary perspective...the way I view a lot of nature.
As I said, there is a subset of CDs that have a definte different biology then typical CD, as well as a group who have different pyscology, i.e. gender dysphoria and such. The majority here seem to be hetero-male who just like to dress. I am firmly in that group and am probably pretty biologically, boringly average.
I would love to know what, is there is a what, the behavioral reason why we dress. I have never seen anywhere near an answer for that, but I.would not be too surprised if the were certain behavoiral charecteristics common amoungst us.
@jjandme Ha ha JJ---you could never be "boringly average"---at least not mentally ---you are very intelligent and thoughtful ---- I agree--there are probably certain behavioral aspect that are common to hetero-men who like to dress
The sharing of common physical characteristics I never heard of.
However, there are strong indications that cross dressers do share other common traits.
An excellent member of CDH to talk to about this, who has done some in depth studies on the topic is Rhonda Lee from North Carolina. She may, in fact, run across this topic, as she is quite active on CDH, although this month (August) she is going on an Alaskan cruise.
A few known common shared traits are heterosexual, married with children, work in detailed technical jobs and professions like engineer, electrician, accountant, plumber, mechanic, etc. Gravitate toward male oriented jobs like career military, police, firefighter, construction worker, race car driver, etc. OTOH, there are many shared female traits too. Rhonda's studies are very interesting!
As for me, I fit the pattern, Career Military Cryptologist and in civilian life, an Engineer.
@catgurl That is interesting---many I talk to hear fit those patterns also --- I do in most of them except in my career which is teach in the Social Sciences
Yeah, I tic several of those boxes. So I was destined to dress 👗👙and it is not my fualt🤭😚
