Being Discouraged

Matilda......sweetheart.......don't get discouraged.....all things take time....you will get there.

Weareall behind you.

Dame Veronica

Matilda, please don't give up. I have felt the same way, that is until the other day, I walked into a lingerie store, and was looking around at different panties when a  s sales girl approached me then asked if she could help I stammered a little bit and just blurt it out I'm looking for panties to fit me she was very helpful take the first step it felt so free.  Stick with it girl don't be discouraged.

Love Jonnie

Hey girl:

I've lost myself many times trying to force the physical part of being feminine. Never could get the the look I wanted...always something wasn't right. I'm a rookie with the makeup...can't tell you how many times that's been a disaster. But then I realize that being feminine is more a state of mind. If I'm thinking all those things that make me feel like a woman then everything else falls into place. I can't force myself to be anything. I have to shape my thinking first then it doesn't matter what I'm wearing it's how I'm feeling inside. Read some articles on transitioning...not the physical stuff but the way you move and act. Ways to develop your mannerisms. I've learned crossdressing is not something I can rush into. It's something I grow into.

Hi Matilda

I just want to echo what the others have said - don't get discouraged.  I'm new to this myself and am having setbacks all the time.  Gradually I am finding what works and what doesn't.   I liken CD to learning a foreign language - it has to be learnt.  I have never put makeup on in my life until last week .  It doesn't come naturally to me and I simply have to learn how to do it.   The same goes for hair removal - it can be done without a problem but each person needs to find out what method and technique suits them best.  You will get there, just stick at it.  There is a huge amount of support on this site.

Don't get so crazy about it. The razor burn will get better once you get a technique and a razor that works well for you. You will find a style and size of panties that will look best on you. Makeup is something that takes practice and patience. It's continuous improvement. You get better with experience. Have fun with it.

Like everyone else has said, please don't get discouraged. Things do take time, they take practice, and they take experimenting. Makeup and I are barely on speaking terms - I look great after a transformation with a professional applying my makeup, and when I do it myself I look like a clown the first time through and have to scrub everything off and start again. And again. And again.

For me it is more the state of mind than the appearance. Dressing in clothes that respect the female portion of my very being doesn't always mean that I will end up looking genetically female. Some days I get closer than others, but usually it's more important that I feel I am respecting my female self than if I appear to be a genetic female.

I know that might not work for everybody, but it's what keeps me going. Even if it's just wearing a pair of panties under my boy clothes, or a belt that came from the women's department instead of the men's - it's all good.

My journey started when I was a child and now that I am nearing retirement age it still has a long way to go. Some days are easier then others, but in the long run it has been a positive part of creating the person I am and the success I have had in life.

Good luck

Millie

Just some tips from a girl whose main gender dysphoria revolves around her hair.

1. Use a razor with a minimum of 4 blades.

2. Bikini shave cream at target.   Instant relief and preventative razor burn tech. 😉 you're welcome.

3. Try shaving at a 45 degree angle instead of with or against the grain     Especially sensitive areas like under arm, pubic, or bum.

4.  Moisturize       Have to moisturize after shaving it's a must.  And be mindful of your clothing.  Just beginning I would only use cotton.

5. If you experience razor burn throw out the razor. And do not stop shaving! Shave around the razor burn.

Hope this helps  if anything get number 2

❤️

P

Hello Matilda; crossdressing is an experience of constant learning. We learn what works from our successes and from our mistakes we learn what doesn't work. Although it's difficult to face, failure is the greatest teacher of all. The most important thing is don't let the low points overwhelm you. Also, don't be afraid to seek out assistance from professionals, especially with make-up.  I hope you have progressed with success since you posted this.

You are not alone. When my wife and I first started to create Gigi there was much to learn and there still is. It was awkward at first. We have only been at this for a couple of months. We always have fun trying to get better each time. It is a process that teaches us a little more each time. Have patience and don't expect miracles; you will only be disappointed. Best of luck and always have fun. I hope this can help.

We all struggle at times with makeup, clothes, etc.  I still struggle with my make up, but let' s keep trying.  You will have a break through moment when everything comes together and you will say, wow Matilda, you did it!

Although the details  are different, do you really feel that every cis girl hasn’t felt the same way and the same frustrations as they learn when and how, and when not and how not?  Look at young teen girls and the mistakes they make with style choices and makeup application. They learn from their mistakes and from their peers how to do it better. They want to fit in and model themselves against their friends, what they see out in the world, and in magazines. They spend YEARS learning what works for them. Can we really beat ourselves up when we aren’t perfect after a few attempts to emulate what has take them a lifetime to perfect?  Give yourself a break!  Yes, you will have frustrations and set backs. But you will also have lots of small successes. Enjoy those successes, learn from your mistakes and failures, and keep on keeping on. And before you know it, you’ll be helping new CDH members when they want to throw up theirs hands in frustration. Trust me, I get it. And I’m far from perfect. But most importantly, I’m enjoying the journey. Step by step, you can enjoy yours, too.

With all my love,

xoxo Brenda

1. If it's in you, a little discouragement won't stop you!

Baby steps. It's an art, which takes lifelong and patient practice, and brings its own rewards.

When the rewards outweigh the disappointments, you find positive momentum.

But the disappointments can fuel the determination to do better next time!

It's a lot like normal life...

Love Laura