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For 20 years, I have kept my secret from my son. We, my wife and I could never decide.
He is rediculously intelligent and is destined for great things.....Seriously he is... Imagine Sheldon from Big Bang, but more intelligent..... Because of this, we didn't want to possibly damage his school work so we put it off. He's now in a top end university in London.... Only he's not... hanks to covid, he's home with us. This means that since November, I have had no time to dress as he is constantly at home.... I'm also at home, again, thanks to covid.... This has been seriously getting me down, and my depression was building.
This morning, I said to my wife that we have to find a solution.... We did.
Tonight, I told my son. After years of worrying. After years of soul searching. After years of stressing and hiding, I told him.... His response "Meh".... Well not exactly "meh" but he really couldn't give a.... Monkey's.... Not a care, not a worry.... Well, his only worry was if I was transgender. I told him I wasn't and that I have no desire to change gender.
After a long chat, I left him and his mother to talk in private. I went to get changed.
I went downstairs and into the living room. "well?" I said.... "to be honest dad," he replied, "I was expecting a lot worse".
No drama. No tears. No tantrums.... No mentally damaged future physics professor.
I should feel elated. I don't. I feel proud. Proud of my son for being such a level headed , non judgemental, accepting all, wonderful young man.
I'm so lucky to not only have an understanding wife, but also such a wonderful son.
https://www.amazon.co.uk/photos/share/iTW1O0CATuL3t4TeADB3xG5a64luWtpTMlAswj7D3Se
Hi Linda,
Welcome to CDH. Sometimes we over stress our anxieties. Great that all worked out for you and your family.
Alice
Wow, just Wow.
I can totally relate, having our lad home from Uni since November is a real challenge (oh and his moved his GF in as they can't bare to be apart 🙄) We've decided not to tell him for exactly the same reasons as you, only I'm no where near as brave or ready to take that step yet. Even if I wanted to, it'll take a visit from the fire brigade with their 'jaws of life' to separate them long enough to have a decent conversation. I guess I'll just hang around in the wardrobe for a bit longer.
Oh, as the others have said, welcome to CDH, good to meet you.
Didi 💋
Darling Linda...
I am so happy for you! Indeed, what a weight lifted. It took a while to come out to friends and my neighbours but the reactions range from the smiling acceptance to the really positive affirmation. However, I’m not willing to come out to my wife’s family as there are a number of younger grandkids to consider... not willing to risk her relationships. That will come later; how much later is yet to be determined though that is not a weight of responsibility I bear.
That being said... bravo! I hope you can enjoy your new adventure!
Hugs Polly
Wonderful! My son just turned 18 and my wife has been very adament about not telling him yet. You are fortunate to have a supportive family.
hello Linda. its is very wonderful to have a excepting wife and son now that knows you x dress. wish i could tell my youngest on still at home that i x dress but afraid of what will come to it. so i dress up when he is at work from 5 to 930, yes 4 hours a day some times 5 and only 3 to 4 days a week. wife knows of my x dressing and is some what excepting, she lets me know when i can dress up but she will not see me dressed up even tho she has seen me getting dressed up and dressed up . have a nice day and be safe during this so called virus.
Hi Linda,
Similar story here. Daughter on extended stay at home from Uni due to Covid. “Caught” me in a skirt and cami. Kind of pushed my disclosure to her to the front burner. Got that “meh” response too. It seems like it was a much more traumatic experience for me than her. Actually, not traumatic at all. In the end, it was a really great conversation, full of understanding and acceptance. Not unlike the reception from my wife when she and I had the talk.
I know it’s different for everybody. But my experience tells me we stress about CD much more than anyone else in our orbits does. And the relief that comes with openness is a wonderful thing.
So glad to hear you had that wonderful reception from your son.
Best,
Clara
