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From early childhood I dreamed of being one of the girls. I always would see how happy the girls were when dressed in pretty dresses. I also was very jealous of their long pretty hair. I especially had a love for ponytails that were tied back with pretty ribbons and bows.
My mother always told me I had such pretty hair and what she could do with it if I was a girl. She always told me this when she was cutting my hair.
At that age I had no idea that there were differences between boys and girls other than if you wore dresses and had long hair you were called a girl. I wanted to wear pretty dresses and I wanted long hair but was told that was only for girls. Then call me a girl and let my hair grow!!
All of my life I kept my hair short as appropriate for a man until recently. Covit made it inpossible to go get a haircut. Even after the lockdown I didn't like the fact of having to wear a mask. My hair has now grown long enough to put in a ponytail. See the picture in my profile
The girl in me is really enjoying this, but the man in me doesn't really feel comfortable with it so long and I'm not comfortable wearing it in a ponytail except when I'm alone and feeling girly. There's just something about it that makes me feel I'm exposing the fact that I am a crossdresser even though I know a lot of men do have long hair and wear it in a ponytail.
I know I'm too old to ever live out my childhood fantasy of being a cute little girl with a ponytail and ribbons and bows in my hair.
At times I feel I should get it cut but that little girl in me stops me. Another thing that stops me is my wife. She likes it long and also wants me to wear it in a ponytail. She knows all about my crossdressing but has never been very supportive of it.
I use to be very open with her about it but times have changed and I keep it in the closet these days.
I'm really excited over how long my hair is getting and I feel my feminine side wants to emerge from the closet. My masculine and my feminine side are now at odds with each other. I so wish I could choose one or the other and live happily ever after.
Hi, Lacy.
I so envy you, your long hair, I wish I had it,I had the bald crown, and receding forehead, in my early 20's, and Im a long way past that, now, lol.
We all must find our own way, to merge our two personalities, and each of us is different, as much as we are the same, it is a constant battle, until we find our comfort spot, somewhere in the middle, unless we choose to transition.
I wish you well, on finding your true self, it's not an easy journey for many, but the end result can be so,,,,,,right.
Hugs, Regi👸💕
In guy mode wear a Motley Crue tee shirt, and all will be good.
Diane
Hi Lacy,
Nice hair! If you have your own long hair, enjoy it while you can! There's been times in my life when it's been appropriate or necessary to wear shorter hair, but by and large I prefer long and loose hair, with a hairband for windy weather or whatever.
One of my mistakes in the past has been to refuse to cut even the slightest bit, so it never has been the tidiest head of hair. In my case I've accepted that it's a case of a "two steps forward, one step back" scenario, so I get a trim now and again, and of course lose a small amount of length in the process.
Marti xxx
I'm like you, for the most part it's just long and not at all looking like the girl in me would like to see it. One of these days I might spend the time with a curling iron and see what I can do with it.
I still don't know when I will get it cut but before I do I want to experiment with it. I have a number of nice wigs but it's just not the same as playing with your own hair.
I do wear guys T-shirts and jeans most of the time but I also wear panties and other feminine undergarments under my guy clothes and I'm always very aware of that girl in me just under the surface
Lacy, you are all girl!
It is a wonderful and fabulous feeling to feel womanhood. I sense that is true for both of us.
Hugs to you girl!
Diane
I'm not one who would ever transition. I'm comfortable calling myself "A trany gurl" People close to me in life would never understand so I will take my secret to my grave in hopes there is an opportunity to come back again and live another life as the girl I've always dreamed of being.
Lacy, I am 73 and still wear ribbons and bows in my long hair! And I often go out in girly clothes too. I am decades past being cute, but I still FEEL cute inside.
Hi Lacy,
Your hair looks lovely, with or without the ponytail. I stopped cutting mine over a year and a half ago, and still don't have enough for a decent ponytail. I've had it permed twice, and the only comments from friends and family is that I look like an old '60s Rocker. Long hair is totally acceptable for guys now, so don't let it bug you.
Hugs,
Bettylou
I too always kept short masculine hair all my life but when Covid hit I let it grow and haven't gotten it cut in over a year and a half. I call my long hair Covid Hair. It now makes about a 12 inch white silver grey ponytail which I wear that way in public and I love it. Feeling it brush against my neck combined with underdressing with panties and a bra makes me feel so girly all day long.
At home I wear it down and it falls about four inches below my shoulders which I pull it behind my ears. At my age its beginning to thin a bit on top so I wear a ball cap in public and plan on letting it grow as long as it can get or until it all falls out... lol. It takes a bit more work but I love my long hair and wish I had done it years ago.
I may be wrong or its wishful thinking but it seems some women are more friendly towards me now in striking up conversations. I don't feel embarrassed about my ponytail at all but I don't put ribbons or bows in it either. A black scrunchie is as feminine a decoration as I do.
I too, have covid hair. My last haircut was June 2019. Taking care of longer hair is more time consuming than a Mr. Drab haircut. I look at it as a challenge and a learning process. GG's have to learn long hair care too. Shampoos and conditioners and other hair products and treatments are fun to experiment with. I haven't colored my hair so it is a natural silver/grey color. I curl it from time to time using a curling iron or a set of steam curlers that my wife bought for me, although she frequently uses them.
Mr. Drab wears the long hair in a low ponytail most of the time. Mary, when working out in the garden during the warm weather will pull her hair back into a ponytail set higher near the crown of her head. I have had several GG's stop me and compliment me on my long hair. Long hair is fun. Mary
Hi Lacy. It has been almost 2 years since my last hair cut, only having a small trim twice. My hair now comes down around my shoulders and the way it frames my face I think gives me a feminine look with just this. Last week I got my hair colored for the second time. The first time was only to cover the gray, I asked to try to match my origonal hair color - I just wanted to cover the gray. This year I got it colored darker and now it is a dark brown and looks very dark red at the roots. The girls at Ulta (where I had it done) commented that it looked good, a nice autumn look.
When I am out in drab I tie it back in a pony tail.
. . Cassie
I love the feeling of my ponytail brushing across my neck too.
I haven't called it my Covit hair but if anyone wants to know why I'm letting it grow so long, I do blame it on Covit and tell them I'm not getting it cut until Covit is gone. We all know that Covit will never fully go away so I will see how long my hair will grow.
Thanks for sharing that story, Lacy. I suppose many of us experience that struggle in different ways between remaining true to the alignment of the familiar masculine identity according to the societal norms that we were locked into from youth and the exciting and daring new adventure of our CD exploration. That struggle shows up in me in other ways, but not in my choice of hair style.
My hair is not as nice as yours, and it is getting thin on top, but I have let it grow past my shoulders and sometimes tie it into a ponytail. I am loving the freedom and even the sense of rebellion I feel about growing my hair long now that I am in my 60s. I am looking forward to my hair growing even longer!
How wonderful that your wife is enjoying and supporting your new hair style!
I would suggest you try to free yourself from making you decision about your hair based on cultural norms or other people's judgments. You just enjoy unpacking the inner you and see where the journey of finding self takes you.
Best wishes, Lacy!
