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I am finding things very difficult at the moment, in fact it has now been over two months since I have put on my skirt, top, leggings or hold up stockings and boots. I think it is all to do with the summer evenings where the curtains are kept open until quite late, and what with living in a one bedroom ground floor flat which looks out onto a car park, with neighbours always walking past our windows who obviously don't know about me being a CD, there is no privacy.
I am finding that I am getting extremely frustrated and irritable.
During the winter evenings, the curtains get closed and no one can look in.
But when I am dressed as Alison, all my stresses and worries of everyday life are gone.
My Wife is fully understanding, so I am very lucky, so that is not a problem.
Let's hope the winter days are not too far away.
As I have mentioned in earlier posts I do have a badly formed toe on one foot which raises the centre joint of the toe up to form an arch shape, this does make the choice of nice size 9 / 10 UK footwear a real problem as my toe rubs and get blisters.
In the past I have twice purged and got rid of most of my clothes and footwear, but this time I am so sure that I want to keep everything.
Does anyone else have similar problems?
Alison. Hi! I feel for you......cannot your toe be straightened by surgery? As far as dressing in summer.......why not wear your lingerie, a pair of "leggings" and a rather uni-sex top. Maybe a short haired wig as well. That should get you by till winter. Good luck....
Dame Veronica
Hi Dame Veronica, Thank you for your kind comments.
I should mention this to my diabetic nurse, I have Type 2 diabetes, tablet and diet controlled. I know that you have to be careful with your feet when you are diabetic.
I will be off out on Saturday, I may be able to get something suitable and summery.
My main worry is the pesky neighbours, endlessly in and out of the car park, nosing into our windows. We don't have a garden, just a border and the pavement and car park.
Best wishes, Alison
I had a problem with the small toe on my right foot. It was lower then the rest of my toes, which cause a painful bunion. The bunion was so sensitive to the touch I couldn't wear heels. Eventually I had to have surgery to straighten the toe.
Hi Alison, have you thought of lace/net curtains to give you some privacy, at least until the inside lights get turned on.
Purging is such a waste as the need to dress will return at some time. Packing away your feminine things until your feelings change, makes much more sense.
Hugs
Sheryl
Thank you Sheryl for your kind comments.
I think I am already feeling more positive after writing my thoughts down and also after getting some replies.
Alison
Thank you Edie for your kind comments.
I will mention my awkward shaped toe when I next see my diabetic nurse.
I did buy a lovely pair of black shoes with 5 inch heels, they were in a charity shop and only cost a couple of pounds. I am sure that I will not be able to walk in them but I fell in Love with them, perhaps I can just sit down when wearing them as they look terrific!
Alison
Hi Allison
I can relate to worries about the neighbors. My wife is petrified of them finding out or our children finding out. I don't leave the house fully dressed. I have been going out since the late 70's and my wife still wants nothing to do with Terri. We all have our own situations, but knowing that there are others just like yourself is a big comfort. I also have diabetes 2, but I lost 30 lbs and it is under control. I can stop taking the medicine, but it is a great appetite suppressant. I wish you good health and happiness.
Yours Terri
Hi Alison! I hear you girl and become the same way when I cannot be Karley. Perhaps an opaque curtain to let the light in but keep prying eyes would do it? As for feeling girl, I've dressed in panties and bra under t-shirt and hiking shorts. I cuff the shorts to show more legs to make me feel girly. A little perfume helps too!
Hello Alison; I'd recommend vertical blinds for your windows. They allow light to enter but would prevent the neighbors from having an unobstructed view. It's your residence and you said your wife is fully understanding in you dressing at home, don't let the outside world hold you down.
Hi Alison, if you were dressed would any nosey neighbours just not think your wife had one of her pals in. I live in the countryside with no neighbours for 1/2 a mile , but in the other direction 1/2 ml is the village if i want to go out i have to run the gauntlet till i clear the village as everyone knows my wife and i and our motor . hope you get the toe fixed so you can enjoy the shoes, and please don't purge it won't work (EVER) kind regards to you both .Py .
I feel your frustration Alison. Dressing in summer can be rough. I sometimes try to be content in dressing partially or just trying not to think about it. Both of these can have mixed results.
Even when I succeed in being content with my male self for a while. I know the urge to be feminine will always return sooner or later. I have also purged multiple times, and also believe I am past that. It may go away for a while, but it's part of me and will always be back.
Let's hope cooler weather returns soon. It's one of my goals to move to a place with air conditioning, hopefully soon. I really hate the time of year when I know all dressing up will get me is lots of sweat and other unpleasantness. I hope you get a chance to improve your situation somehow Alison.
