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A couple of years ago I wanted to somehow connect my everyday male wardrobe to my ‘girl-time’ wardrobe. I decided to maximise the use of ‘unisex’ or gender neutral clothing. This has taken me some time to achieve, slowly buying new items in suitable feminine styles and colours as they needed replacing. The overlap has the advantage of saving storage space, especially for bulky items like coats and shoes.
- I started with coats, changing out my drab man-coats for unisex ones in appropriate colours.
- Shoes were next; tricky enough to buy man-shoes for my big feet (UK size 13), let alone the right fitting ladies shoes (which tend to be narrower). Now I have a selection of shoes that have a style crossover or similarity with womens shoes. For example black tasselled loafers, classic white trainers for summer, some navy flat deck shoes. [I have more pairs of shoes than my SO 🙂 ]
- I bought a nice sun hat; it is a unisex style somewhat like a straw Fedora/Panama hat and is great for summer outings worn with a summer dress and white trainers.
- Polo shirts. I got rid of all my old drab brown, grey, olive green ones and replaced them with some nice colours - bright red, sage green, lavender, lilac, royal blue, wine red and so on. The polo shirts are great for casual wear and pair nicely with a denim skirt (and other skirts).
- I also have a small selection of zip through fleece jackets in feminine colours, nice to wear on a cooler day instead of a coat while I’m out or under a coat on a cold winter’s day.
There are other items that have lots of potential too, like suitable ordinary T-shirts, jumpers and other tops; which I will be looking at using in the future.
As I've bought the new clothes, my SO has said how much she likes the colours I've chosen and how much they suit me.
I now have a nice selection of more feminine clothes in my man-drobe, which I can wear during my ‘girl-time’ too. Having overlapped my two wardrobes, it has helped reduce my dysphoria feelings and the disconnect between ‘normal’ days and my very special girl-time.
Having overlapped my two wardrobes, it has helped reduce my dysphoria feelings and the disconnect between ‘normal’ days and my very special girl-time.
I love this approach - what a great idea!
Hugs
Ellie x
@ajthairms I've done something similar. I buy plain women's jeans that I can wear in male mode. I have to play a bit with the phones and wallet in the smaller pockets (like using the back pockets more) but otherwise they fit great.
I wear women's tee shirts, often with a V neck that is deeper than a guy's tee.
I wear women's flat shoes that look unisex enough. I also wear women's low-rise socks. In the colder months, if I'm not going to the gym, I'll wear opaque winter tights instead of socks.
If the weather is right, I will wear a woman's jean jacket or cardigan. Other than buttening on the opposite side it doesn't look overtly feminine. I do have a coat or two that could be worn in either male or female mode.
I have women's shorts that I wear for the gym. They are long enough and baggy enough to pass as guy shorts.
So there are days I will wear everything from the women's department that all appear close enough to unisex clothing.
@ajthairms I like this approach. I do have a couple of items that work in both modes, notably a denim jacket. My jacket has a brooch of a red haired lady with glasses on it.
Before I went full fem I spent about 8 months going to my Church wearing black pants, black blazer, black flats and a silky top all from Torrid. The pants and blazer looked very much like a men's suit. The pants and top blazer felt much softer than any men's clothes.
Cassie
Alicen, thanks for this, my wardrobe, a few months ago, was about 20% Allie stuff and 80% what I considered male things.
However, I've been slowly sending largely-underused things like shirts, trousers etc. to charity shops so that's freed up some space. I do have a fair collection of so-called "Hippie" clothes, colourful/tie-dye/psychedelic light cotton cargo trousers and "grandad"shirts so now the space is 30% Allie, 40% "Unisex" and 30% Drabwear, in that order. It looks much better.
Thanks again for the idea 😊
Allie x
Spot on, Alicen. I could have written the same , although less eloquently, so thanks!
Women's clothes are so much more interesting. And at one end of the scale there's a whole bunch of unisex options. Colourful, soft on the skin, and feel good. Why be drab?
For anyone who feels challenged or frustrated about getting 'quality time' to dress, this may be an approach to consider.
Emma x
@ajthairms This is mainly how I get time to dress - select clothes that are difficult to pin down as for one gender or the other. I call it dressing androgynously.
Doing so has some obvious limitations, such as not wearing pretty dresses or frilly tops in public, but the main upside, if you do it well, is that you can dress androgynously 24 hours per day and most people won't/can't even notice, unless you do something which draws attention to yourself. Big breast forms do this, but sport bras and small forms draw far less attention.
My wardrobe is exclusively women's or unisex. And unisex is mostly my collection of band tees....which get worn often and often with skinny jeans.
There's nothing overtly feminine about my usual daily wear. But it's not typical guy wear either. I dress for comfort.
I suppose I could say I'm overlapping genders. Blurring is probably a better word. It seems irrelevant. I feel feminine regardless of what I'm wearing. I'm pretty comfortable in my own skin. And it feels amazing!
When someone looks at me they see a woman. That's how I'm treated. I stopped passing as a guy more than a year ago.
/LK
@ajthairms yup! That's something I being working on for some time. Underdressed (socks, panties, tights) mixed with women's styles that could easily be perceived as male clothes.
Not that I would want to even consider trying this, but if I did, it would be a near impossible job, since my female wardrobe consists of mainly bright & cheery colors. Whereas, my male clothes tend to be on the drab side. Moreover, my girl clothes are distinctly female in many ways, unsuitable for a male to wear.
Put another way, the two wardrobes are like oil & water. They cannot mix.
Alicen -
Thank you for sharing. What a lovely idea on how to integrate both wardrobes. Over the last souple years my wife has helped me get more colorful in my wardrobe - out with the drab in with some color. As you said polos are one place this has happened as well as t-shirts. My t-shirts are still male but more color and patterns. I do have a couple pair of female shorts she gave me taht no longer fit her, other than the zipper opening on the left and the pockets being smaller you can't tell the difference. I also have a pair of ankle boots that are black suede - they look like men's cowboy boots and I've worn them out without incident. After reading your post I am going to start looking to make some changes in my wardrobe as well. Thanks for the thought.
XOXO
Suzanne
Great idea. My feminine wardrobe would not pass in male mode in the least. Due to style or lace or cut of the blouse. When I dress I prefer to not wear jeans or pants. So most of my outfits are skirt or dress based. I do have some leggings for around the house
Hello are you going to pride today Im looking for someone to go with dressed or not?
