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Surprise "attack" 🙂

15 Posts
14 Users
82 Reactions
642 Views
Posts: 9
Lady
Topic starter
(@davinasimba)
Eminent Member     Sjælland, Denmark
Joined: 1 year ago

Hi gals... 

I just feel a need to tell you about this other day.

So i've been Crossdressing since February, so i'm still fairly new in this universe.

Me and my wife have talked about it , and she was weirded out about it, but tried her best not to be to conservative, and she was okay, as long as she didn't have to have anything to do with this new part of me. 

And me, i didn't really know how to be around either to be honest.. So i found a good solution.

I am an old timer Streamer on twitch, but haven't streamed in many years, so i thought.. HEY let's re-Brand my self as Davina, because then i have an extra excuse to dress up and be Davina. 

So that's what i did. and then it would feel a bit bit more natural, because.. it's a "brand" 

So i was streaming the other day. and just as i was about to finish up, my wife walked in on me, because she needed help with some computer stuff,  not knowing i was dressed or streaming. 

So i finished up the stream, she was sitting and waiting, and when i was done i helped her, and we talked and talked about random life stuff.

And then slowly i started to undress to get my "normal" outfit on and look maskuline again and remove makeup and such. 

I was still talking with her about random stuff.

When i was done and a "man" again. 

It suddenly hit me.. 

She is talking to me like nothing is changed, like i'm still just me.. She has gotten SOOOOO far.

So i naturally complimented her, and told her how much this reliefs my heart and how happy it makes me. it really means a lot.

 

and typical her: "Well i'm trying baby, i'm doing my best".. i smiled and kissed her and she went to bed after that., 

She is just such a sweetheart and i love her. And again.. she is really trying.., and i was thinking it was going to take a LONG while before she would get more accepting.

I don't know how to end this story haha . 

I hope you gals enjoy the story. 

 

Lovez & Hugz to you all

Davina

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14 Replies
5 Replies
Managing Ambassador
(@ellyd22)
Joined: 2 years ago

Majestic Member     Norfolk, United Kingdom
Posts: 5210

@davinasimba 

Thanks for sharing this 🙂

Your wife sounds like an absolute gem.

Also ... I LOVE the idea of 'rebranding'.

*starts Googling how to trademark 'Ellie Davis' and begins planning a range of merchandise*

Ellie x

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(@playinginmypanties)
Joined: 6 years ago

Estimable Member     Monroe, Connecticut, United States of America
Posts: 170

@davinasimba That is great news. It shows that you both have true love! You are the same person she married and make sure she knows that. My wife is also on board with me! I pray that everyone's wife understands that.

Best wishes Brenda.

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Lady
(@harriette)
Joined: 2 years ago

Illustrious Member     Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Posts: 4015

Posted by: @davinasimba

typical her: "Well i'm trying baby, i'm doing my best".. i smiled and kissed her and she went to bed after that., 

She is just such a sweetheart and i love her.

What more could you ask for?

However, you might want to giver her a heads-up next time. At least that way she won't get another surprise. You can fill in the details of how you do that.

 

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(@jenniferr)
Joined: 2 years ago

Estimable Member     Greenville, South Carolina, United States of America
Posts: 81

@davinasimba  I think that sometimes we forget that when we come out, in many cases it's as much of an adjustment for our friends and relatives as it is for us.  While it's new for us to be out, to most of those we know it's also new to them.  Although they've heard about it they've never really known or experienced anything like it in their real lives.  Like you, I found that it's better to ease them into it.  Once I told my friends I noticed that even though they were all accepting and supportive, there was still some uneasyness.    I didn't walk out to them full blown, I wore small conservative earrings, like a little black stud or small crosses.  Then I no longer removed my nail polish but stuck to lighter colors like pink, started wearing 3" wedge shoes, then women's every day clothes like jeans and shirts.  Over around 2 months they don't even notice any more, it's just me, the same me they've always known.  Just as we've been programmed with all the fear and guilt, so have they, and they need some time to process it also.   Most of my friends were born and raised here, smack in the middle of the bible belt, pickup driving country boys from very conservative families, the type who used to get their kicks in their young years harassing or beating up gays.  Yeah, now they wonder why I was so reluctant to come out to them, even feel offended that I felt I couldn't tell them, and it's taken them awhile to learn, see their mistake,  process this new factor in their lives.  But now, they actually look forward to see what kind of outfit I'll be wearing on Saturday night when I go out, one will even occasionally go along with me.   Like anything else, it's never wise to just throw changes into peoples faces and demand they be accepting and welcoming.  Force will always cause resistance.  Patience, understanding that everyone needs time to adjust, in order to be accepted we have to be acceptable, and most times the good side of human nature will take it's course.  One step at a time, we can't change over a thousand years of social programming over night. 

Hugs,

Jennifer

   

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Lady
(@davinasimba)
Joined: 1 year ago

Eminent Member     Sjælland, Denmark
Posts: 9

@jenniferr Wauw.. just wauw babe... That's so well put and such a godo story as well <3 <3 

Truth spoken right here.. <3 <3 i love this insight.

 

You're a wise one Jennifer <3

Hugz and Lovez

Davina

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Posts: 760
Duchess
(@jennconn)
Noble Member     Florida, United States of America
Joined: 2 years ago

That’s just such a beautiful story to hear, Davina, just thinking of what you said warms my heart.

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Posts: 23
(@vermonta)
Eminent Member     Georgetown/Crescent City, Florida, United States of America
Joined: 3 years ago

Great story Davina, you and I are amongst the few lucky ones with accepting partners. When I met my present wife I told her about my alternate wardrobe and she was  okay with it. I "dress" every evening and when I wear something over the top such as short skirts with nylons and visible garter straps she will politely ask me to tone it down a bit. Until recently going out dressed and wearing makeup were out of the question, but to my surprise she suggested that I try getting made up and go to our local pride group's events. One big rule is that I keep it from the neighbors and her two daughters. She is a bit uneasy about it and at this time does not want to go with me, but I am hoping that will also change. She is an awesome woman!

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Posts: 1118
Duchess Annual
(@firefly)
Noble Member     Panama, Panama, Panama
Joined: 7 years ago

I love your story, Davina, and I predict a happy ending. Love will prevail. Your wife is in the right track for you as she is willing to try. I'm glad for you. 

Gisela

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Posts: 3436
Hostess
(@ab123)
Illustrious Member     Surrey, United Kingdom
Joined: 5 years ago

A lovely simple story of acceptance from a wonderful partner. Everything was said, no ending required.

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Posts: 328
Duchess
(@karla1958)
Honorable Member     Not in New Orleans, Louisiana, United States of America
Joined: 3 years ago

What a great story.  Love it!

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Posts: 90
Duchess
(@amydoll)
Estimable Member     Leicestershire, United Kingdom
Joined: 12 months ago

That's a great story and it's fantastic that she's as open to you as you describe, given it's only a short time since February!

Wishing you much happiness as things evolve further X 

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Posts: 2108
Hostess
(@cdsue)
Famed Member     Delaware, United States of America
Joined: 5 years ago

.Davina -

What a lovely story, thank you for sharing.

It can take some time for our SO's to come around. It took some time for my wife to accept Suzanne but she did eventually. There are limitations but that is to be expected, as time goes by they are becoming less. I always take my lead from her as to what is acceptable and it is working so far.

XOXO
Suzanne

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Posts: 6
Lady
(@martinamae)
Active Member     Galway, Connacht, Ireland
Joined: 1 year ago

Davina, having an SO join you on your journey is unmeasurable really and their support should be greatly acknowledged. Those of us who have their respective partners support are most fortunate in not only the advice regards with clothing and makeup, which will significantly boost your confidence when the time comes to venturing out in public.

Like you, I've only recently discovered this aspect of my personality....it all started with a desire i shared with my SO regards to wearing heels...the rest is history, as they say.

When femme, I'm a much calmer person in that i am more content.... this helped significantly when stepping out in public. Not having to go alone,  i know i would not have achieved so much in a relatively short time, is all thanks to her.

So, for those of us who have the support of their SOs, a BIG THANK YOU, the least we can do is to repay them with honesty and respect.

 

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1 Reply
(@finallyfiona)
Joined: 1 year ago

    Leighton Buzzard, Bedfordshire, United Kingdom
Posts: 1458

@martinamae Martina, welcome to CDH from a girl the UK 🙂 This is a very warm and supportive sisterhood where you can talk freely, be taken seriously and listened to - and offered advice, if you need it.  There's also plenty of information to devour on the site.  It looks like you're already well set with a supportive OH though, lucky girl you!

Do continue to jump in and chat on the forums or the chatroom.  I see you've written a pretty full profile, but I'm sure we'd all love to welcome you in and get to know you if you'd like to post a thread in the Introductions forum 🙂

Hugs,
Fiona xxx

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