Welcome to Crossdresser Heaven, a safe and welcoming place for everyone in the crossdresser community.
Join Crossdresser Heaven today to participate in the forums.
The one thing that's becoming clear from all the astute commentary by CDH members in a variety of forums is that in making the transition from male drab to female exciting self-definition en femme, all sorts of unanticipated things happened to many that made them blush a little when a flub occurred or when, inadvertently, they revealed more than what they really wanted others to know about them, especially in regard to who they really wanted others to understand them to be. There are many instructive stories to be enjoyed and learned from here. Tell us how you showed more accidentally, and how in the long run that accident helped you become who you now know you really are.
I've been dressing since my teen years 50 years ago but only at home. I used to play rugby at weekends and sure enough I broke my wrist after a mighty challenge. My wrist and forearm were plastered up and I carried on as best I could but couldn't work. I took the opportunity off to walk around wearing my partner's best lacy panties and wore them outside. Sure enough I had to make an unscheduled trip to the local hospital as the pain was getting worse. I thought about going home and putting my boring man pants on but thought what's rhe point its my wrist. You can guess the rest..the doctor decided to check nerve endings ,reflexes etc and asked me to take my jeans off. He had no doubt seen much much worse in his time and showed no interest while i was perspiring by the gallon. I still have yet to fully venture out as Samantha perhaps I should have started that day.
Not much of a story really, but I went into a dispensary an femme, but forgot I had to show my driver's license which, of course, had my male name. The receptionist just asked if I had a different name to use so I wouldn't be outed when he called it out when my time came.
Yeah, I just don't care if I'm clocked. I try to look as femme as I can, but know I am really not fooling anyone who pays much attention, and so what if they know I am cross-dressed?
My attitude is now to let them see me en femme and just maybe it will stimulate a discussion and move the needle of acceptance a little. Or, better yet it will motivate someone to dress or a SO to accept their partner's dressing a bit more. The way attitudes change is by being exposed to such concepts in normal ways.
Hi JJ
Yes I totally agree...I joined this site a few days ago and already I feel more confident about Samantha even though I am content as Stephen.
I've now changed my profile picture to Samatha with her own grey hair and first hopeless attempt at make up .
I still have to venture out as Samantha but with the help of the lovely people on this site that big day gets closer xx
I have three different stories,
1. The first time I ever went out en femme was to a friends Halloween party, there were friends that i have known for over 20 years there that didn't recognize me. the host actually told my wife that there was more to this than just a costume, she was right! and I was the hit of the party, that was several years ago and they still talk about it.
2. The first time my sister-in-law met Emily, we all scheduled pedicures and make overs, mine was at a different time than her and my wife so I met them at a store after. I was standing in the isle next to them, when my wife said there is (male name) my sister-in-law looked all around and said where!
3. The wife and I went to a Holiday themed drag event several cities away from where we live, we walked through the front door and a couple we have known for many years yelled my wife's name from across the room, we went over and they were in awe! I said well now you know, we had the best night.
I was at the stage of coming out so family and a few friends knew but not the neighbours. One night dressed and expecting a friend the doorbell rang a little early but I was ready. I swung open the door and standing there was a neighbour!! She did needlework and had some trousers given to her by me to alter and she decided to drop them off.
I froze and she asked if - male name - was in so beckoned her in. She asked again looking round. I just said 'I'm here'. She looked me up and down and said'You look nice' and handed me the trousers. I asked what she was thinking and she didn't care. From that she encouraged me to tell other neighbours and with a wonderful acceptance I was able to come and go freely which led to me moving forward in my transition.
For the first few months after going out en femme for the first time, I changed in my car because I didn't want the neighbors to know. I got tired of that fast so started darting in & out of the house when no one was around. Came home one day, was in my garage when I turned and found my female neighbor standing there saying "Hi". I froze, gave a feeble wave, said "Hi" and shut the door. The next day I talked to her and told her about my dressing and she was perfectly fine with it. She loves commenting on my various outfits.
My wife was visiting her brother in San Francisco so I was at home, alone. Sundays are usually the day I go in to full Karla mode. I had spent the day preparing myself...depilating, make-up, hair, dress and shoes.
I decided that I did not want to cook supper. So I made an order through Door Dash. Now mind you, we spend a lot of time getting ourselves dolled up. There was no way I was going to change clothes and wash off my make-up for a two second encounter.
When the doorbell rang, I went to the door, opened to find a young man on the other side. He handed me my order and trying to speak as best as I could in a feminine manner said "Thank you." He simply smiled and said "Have a good evening." He walked away and that was that.
I know I didn't fool him but I do wonder how many times he's told his friends about this encounter.
The funniest time I've been caught was actually unintentional. I got dressed for morning workouts (military) in a hurry after a "good night" with my girlfriend at the time. I didn't want to wake her so I got dressed in the dark. During sit ups, the guy holding my feet noticed a bit of lace and a bow while looking up my shorts. (Wonder why he was looking up my shorts.) He said in a whisper, "I can tell you had fun last night, but you might want to give her back her panties."
Okay, my turn! I always dress nicely under my suits, casual, etc…one day not long ago, I was showing houses to a buyer. That afternoon as we were leaving a house, another realtor arrived to enter as we were exiting and locking up. Happens I know that realtor very well. We had not seen one another in a few weeks, so she naturally gave me a hug in greeting me. Her hand went over my camisole strap and then she felt the pretty stitching down my back. I was mortified!!! Without missing a beat, she winked at me with a knowing smile and patted me on the bottom as she slipped by me, I’m sure verifying I was indeed wearing panties and garters. To my relief, she only said we really need to get together over drinks soon! Never a word was shared with anyone else to my knowledge. And yes, when we see each other every so often, she gives me a big mischievous smile before she hugs me and kisses me on the cheek.
One day I arrived at the office and my secretary had a shocked look on her face. She exclaimed your wearing earrings! I indeed had put on a pair of my wife's clip on earrings that morning and forgot to take them off. I acted like I didn't know they were on me, which I didn't, and mumbled about killing my wife for this. I am pretty sure she didn't buy that story for a minute. Nothing more was ever said about it but I'm sure the secretarial pool was a buzz with that story for a while.
On the window cleaner theme as a teenager at home I got dressed one day. Parents working and house to myself. I had long hair so no problem. Bra and kicks on next some cream coloured women's pants, blouse and block heeled boots as its 1982ish. Hair styled in a fashion and lippie on. Loving the time and walking around swinging my hips. Turn round and there's Robin Nedwell, UK readers will understand, for others he's a fictitious window scrubber. What could I do but brave it out and move to another room.
Anyhow he continued to do his job and give me a knowing smile when his ladders crossed my path.
Exciting and scary then, funny now.
I have been getting a good amount of Chanel time and have become more comfortable going out on errands etc in Chanel mode and even in part femme mode, ie clothes and makeup, heels, no wig. I decided this was a bit too dangerous so I dialed it back, except trips to a few safe places that were far enough from home. One of these such places was the dry cleaners. For drop off and pick up they have seen me in drab, fully en femme, and partial. They are always polite and business like. They are a polite Asian family and I enjoy supporting their business. Well, last week I was continuing the “tone it down” mode and I went into their store in drab mode. I was scanning some recent Chanel photos on my phone of me in a purple chiffon and sequin gown, as I turned over my ticket and the owner returned with my items, I placed my phone down to retrieve my credit card to pay…and he said, “that’s you in photo- very pretty”…I said huh? He repeat himself and pointed to my phone “That’s you in the photo - you are very pretty”! I was flattered for a second and said thank you I just bought the gown…on the way out reality set in and it occurred to me that he now knew my appearance in drab, and as Chanel, and he knows my name. What if he sees me somewhere and says something?
what should I do now? Sorry, I guess this one wasn’t comic…