The Swimsuit

 I love “first time” stories. I think a lot of us do. This wasn’t exactly a first time, but it was a first for me when I went to live with my father in Las Vegas.

In June 1987, I flew out to Las Vegas to spend the summer with my father. I was 14. As circumstance would have it, I never left and spent almost 11 years there. I made the decision upon leaving Michigan that I wasn’t going to crossdress anymore (I had been doing it with my mom’s clothes since I was around 8). I would leave it behind and start fresh.

Right.

My dad had a girlfriend (we’ll call her Kathi) and they were living together in a studio efficiency. Dad confidently said “it’ll only be for a couple weeks”

A month later….. We traded the studio for a dumpy one bedroom and spent the rest of the summer there. My father‘s gambling habit created many unfavorable circumstances when I lived with him. This was just the beginning.

At least I upgraded from sleeping on the floor, to a thin foam pad on a pull out sofa bed that was likely manufactured when LBJ was president.

It sucked. I had absolutely no privacy. Also, because of their opposite work schedules, someone was almost always there. Sure was a good thing I had decided to stop crossdressing! They did have a nice pool though.

Kathi was around 27, quite a bit younger than my dad. She had a toddler son who was spending the summer with his own father. We would later share several bedrooms together.

She was fair skinned. Tall, kinda heavy and rocked it. D cup, very curvy. Bright blue eyes, high cheekbones and angular pink lips. Pretty white teeth. Her curled dark blonde hair just touched her shoulders, which along with the front of her chest were graced with a delicate spray of brown freckles.

In 80’s lingo, she was “fine as hell”.

One morning, we went to the pool. My dad was working. I got there down there first. When I heard the gate open, I turned around.

I looked at her and EVERY intention I had of not crossdressing again was instantly gone…

Kathi was wearing the most beautiful bathing suit I had ever seen. It had a crossover wrap top, which was a dark cobalt blue, with a print of black palm leaves all over it. The back dipped into a deliciously deep U shape.

The bottom half of the suit was black, the front of it covered by an elegant (tummy hiding) draping belt with the prettiest faux bow detail on the right side that had angled tails that hung down just below the knot. The belt was sewn on with a subtle ruffle effect, making it VERY feminine.

I tried really hard not to stare….  I was totally captivated by the look of that beautiful swimsuit clinging to her body. She got in the water after a while.  We were messing around, splashing each other. I managed a few eyefuls close up.

Fine. As. Hell. Damn!!

I just couldn’t stop thinking about the swimsuit though……

A couple days later, I ended up alone in the apartment. A rarity indeed. They had “went to the store” (likely to gamble). I had no idea when they would be back. I needed to use the bathroom, I went in and turned on the light.

There, to my absolute surprise, was Kathi’s lovely swimsuit, hanging on the shower door. I involuntarily drew in a sharp breath and felt my heart begin hammering in my chest.

I reached out my trembling hands and took it off the door. Guts churning, my mind raced and blood rushed to my head.

I held it up to my face and deeply inhaled. It smelled a mixture of Coppertone, chlorine and her. It was intoxicating. I undressed and quickly put it on, slipping the straps over my shoulders.

I looked in the mirror and ran my hands down my sides. The classic wrap top, with its bold black print. The back’s deep U shape so graceful and sexy. I couldn’t stop playing with the little bow and caressing the draping fabric of the belt. So very feminine. The way it felt on my body was pure exhilaration.

I felt like I had hit the Vegas crossdressing jackpot!

It was erotic elation, an adrenaline rush and crushing guilt - all at the same time. Knowing it was something forbidden mingled thrilling euphoria with an icy fear.

I was deathly afraid they would suddenly show up and I would get caught.

God she would probably be soooo pissed……….. He sure would be!

I took it right off and hung it back up. It wasn’t even five minutes later, they came back.

Whew…..

I never got to wear it again while we lived there. I longingly saw it a few times but the circumstances denied me the opportunity to indulge in its guilty pleasures once more.

We finally moved into a real apartment in September and I only saw her wear it maybe a couple times after that. I snooped around a little for it, but no joy.

After a while, it became just a memory. One I will always treasure and never forget as long as I live. The details are as sharp as the moment I stood in that bathroom wearing it…. Almost 40 years ago.

                          ………………..

April 1989 we moved into a small rental house. It would be the first time I actually had my own room and some much appreciated privacy. I would wear Kathi’s clothes whenever I got the chance.

During the move, some stuff was getting donated to a thrift store. Among it were three cardboard boxes.

Of course, l had to see

One box was assorted kitchen stuff. Another, full of books, games and electronic junk.

The last box at the bottom was bigger than the other two and felt heavy. I lifted the flaps open and peered inside…..

It was packed full of women’s clothes.

My pulse rate took off like a rocket. Much of its contents would never make it to Goodwill.

Bet you’ll never guess what was on the top of that pile….