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Imagine you're shopping one day, when you notice a man walking towards you. He's dressed slightly trendy, wearing skinny jeans, a fitted casual shirt, well groomed. Then you notice something different, he's wearing a subtle bracelet, silhoutte lines under his shirt, holding a messenger bag, and walking in black shoes.
As you get closer, you notice he's actually wearing embellished skinny jeans, a fitted blouse, nail polish. Even closer, you now see he's wearing coordinated jewelry, obvious bra and cami strap lines, carrying a cross-body purse, and confidently strutting in black stilettos.
How do you feel? Wait, why does that matter. You don't know him, or maybe you do. You have a right to your own quiet opinion about his fashion, social demeanor, how attractive you find him, and other speculations about him.
How does he make you feel? Curious, scared, intrigued, attracted, nervous, insecure, envious, offended, caring, hateful. Why do you feel those ways? He's just a visual representation on the gender spectrum.
You feel something. Because you and him share time and space for a brief moment. You must feel something, because you're alive and noticed him.
Whatever! And you continue on your way. Because you are confident. Because it doesn't matter. Because you are you. Because he gets to be him, or her, or them.
It's what we all strive for. To feel normal. To feel accepted. To feel safe. To feel cared for. To feel loved. To feel respected.
Because we care.
Well said!
You said this beautifully!
Nicely stated, Lea. I often dream of the world in which one can wear whatever fits one's mood, regardless of how one is presenting otherwise.
You are so right Lea. It just some longer than others to get there, to realize this. Maybe it's my age but I have that who cares attitude about what people think when they see me in many of the items you described.
That is what I am noticing for the most part. Most people don't care. Some that do are really supportive. Our biggest enemy is ourselves. How we act sometimes arouses suspicion. My biggest transition is overcoming my fear. Yes, I know there are jerks out there that will do and say horrible things. I am starting to learn that most people are not that way.
I wish I were where you are, and had that "who cares" attitude. But I'm still at the point where even going out in public is terrifying, and I can't help but care how people react. I don't know if I'll ever get there, actually.
Karen
I loved this! I wish I was the object of the story confidently wearing what I wanted and loving the feeling of being free to be me! Hopefully one day we will be there.
As I get older, the I don't care attitude has replaced my inhibitions. However, the who cares attitude is still applicable when it comes to my 3 daughters-they mean the world to me.
