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For fifty years, the flower hid unseen by any eyes;
Her petals folded neath herself as others passed her by.
She longed to open up but could not overcome her fears
And so remained in darkness, her roots watered by her tears.
It seemed she might be destined to traverse this life alone,
With no one to appreciate her as the years went on.
But then the curtains parted-and the tiniest beam of light
Reached through the darkened room and on that flower did alight.
The warmth and energy it gave allowed the flower to bloom
Until the pot it sat in clearly didn’t have the room
To hold the quickly growing plant as petals did unfold;
No longer weak and timid, it was time to become bold.
And so the flower ventured out into the sunny world
Where all could see the colors of her leaves and flowers unfurled.
The hazy shades of grey were gone, her beauty now so clear
And confidence and joy replaced the nervousness and fear.
Her life was changed as she became who she was meant to be
And looking back from whence she came, it now was clear to see
The walls that seemed so daunting were in fact a house of cards
That when she gave a gentle push fell into many shards.
To realize our potential is the goal towards which we strive
An effort which continues for each day we are alive.
So face your fears and stare them down and you too will succeed
In cutting loose the chains that bind; your true soul will be freed!
Don’t let this life pass you by with regret at not being who you truly are inside. You never know who else you might be inspiring too. I have learned so much from so many of you and I won’t name you all here because I don’t want to leave anyone out accidentally. Thank you for helping me discover myself and I look forward to continuing our journey together!
Cyn
Thank you Cyn 🙂 I think your pome is spot on and what all of us feel inside. Most of us from birth. I mean the differences growing up with our siblings, not mention the parents. As I have said, once my parents guessed I was different ( early seventies), life changed from that relationship. I was treated differently from my brothers & sister. When Dad came home from the war, they got gifts, I didn't, it hurt. Just in the last (3) years I told my mother that I forgave my Dad for the miss treatment. Got the usual " he loves you". Well ok. After my divorce in 1996, I lost all my cousins, (2) of my children, who I talk to, but the wife's really push the grand kids away. Thanks to the Ex "outing me". I rarely seem my grandkids.
So my point girls. I choose this direction and have made choice along the way to make me happy. That includes finding a person ( my wife) who really supports my decision, and frankly does not care what others think.
There are costs that we girls must bare as CYN so eloquently expressed. This is because we my lose what we thought was precious to us. But those individuals have to consider what we feel and who we are. Sometimes that does not work out and for decades I felt responsible for bring Kathie, selfish.
Obviously, I do not feel that way any more. I am Kathie and am beautiful :). My only point is to all of my friends is expect lose. It's OK to be private dressing, It's OK not to tell persons. Enjoy what you have as far as you can, and live your "girl" as far as you fell comfortable. I was at the San Diego "Pride" festival last weekend and meet a girl from Phoenix ( wife was with us) and we had a great time together, talking sharing. Her and my wife are friends now.
Point being, this took a long time getting over the "lost" from those that would not even attempt to understand, even to this day. Family and such.
Just wanted to put this out there as one girls journey that resulted in happiness. Can you find those boundaries and still be happy? Luvs Kathie.:)
PS. Got your message Cyn 🙂
Cyn,
I always admire what you can express in written verse.
Thank you so much for sharing yet another gem.....
Cheerio.
Cookie
2016_poets corner: skippy1965(Cynthia) original post:
For fifty years, the flower hid unseen by any eyes;
Her petals folded neath herself as others passed her by.
She longed to open up but could not overcome her fears
And so remained in darkness, her roots watered by her tears.
It seemed she might be destined to traverse this life alone,
With no one to appreciate her as the years went on.
But then the curtains parted-and the tiniest beam of light
Reached through the darkened room and on that flower did alight.
The warmth and energy it gave allowed the flower to bloom
Until the pot it sat in clearly didn’t have the room
To hold the quickly growing plant as petals did unfold;
No longer weak and timid, it was time to become bold.
And so the flower ventured out into the sunny world
Where all could see the colors of her leaves and flowers unfurled.
The hazy shades of grey were gone, her beauty now so clear
And confidence and joy replaced the nervousness and fear.
Her life was changed as she became who she was meant to be
And looking back from whence she came, it now was clear to see
The walls that seemed so daunting were in fact a house of cards
That when she gave a gentle push fell into many shards.
To realize our potential is the goal towards which we strive
An effort which continues for each day we are alive.
So face your fears and stare them down and you too will succeed
In cutting loose the chains that bind; your true soul will be freed!
Don’t let this life pass you by with regret at not being who you truly are inside. You never know who else you might be inspiring too. I have learned so much from so many of you and I won’t name you all here because I don’t want to leave anyone out accidentally. Thank you for helping me discover myself and I look forward to continuing our journey together!
Cyn
Hi Miss Cynthia,
Beautifully written prose. It's truly speaks to my inner fem/masc self. I find myself at a loss for words. So many feelings unresolved. Courage in high demand. Opportunity to express Amanda in short supply. But that is the inherent nature of transition. I'm not exactly sure where I land in the disposition of my dual nature. I recall from somewhere the words "my split-apart". Me but not me, like a shadow looking at me from behind a partially closed door. That's a lot of words for "loss of words". Putting these notions in black and white seems helpful. Thank you for allowing me to ramble. Just getting a lot weary with muddling my way around. My gut says pull the trigger. My life and relationships will have to define the bullet and the gun. I could be wrong headed about that, but at least it's real today.
Hope this finds you well and happy:)
Mandy
Beautiful and well organized. Look forward to reading more
