Frustration

You are so right about that sis. Hopefully things are a changing

<p style="text-align: left;">Now that I have cried my woes, I am following up with a partial success story.  I took the day off to run some errands.   I stopped by a Goodwill and bought some jeans, beautiful cream blouse and gray/black blouse, and a super soft thick black sweater.  I was in guy clothes and felt panicked but felt great to have that first experience under my belt.  Also nice to have some clothes that I might wear in public in guy mode.</p>

I feel your frustration, almost daily, especially as I walk into my office. You're right, there are so many double standards.

Women can wear whatever, feminine clothes or fashion borrowed from men, with no logic about why women get to wear heels, makeup, have nails done, keep long hair.

Being gay gives some stereotypical license on being more fashionable, borrowing feminine attributes/accessories, compared to the usual hetero guy.

Taking on some title from fashion forward to metro to goth means eyeliner might be okay, nude lipstick passable, shaved limbs acceptable.

Then there's being a CD, and the fear of not being accepted conflictng with the desire to express a suppressed side.

The sad result is frustration.

Congrats Georgia Lane on that first public experience! It's such a big step to overcome, and it will open many doors of fun for you.

Sometime, when you're ready, try on a dress in a thrift store, then move onto a store with unattended dressing rooms, and finish off the experience with trying on a dress in one of those stores that has a dressing room attendant.

Or, try on women's shoes openly in a shoe store or the shoe section of a dept store, while asking the salesperson for help in finding the right size, or the right style.

Encouragingly,

Lea

I can definitely relate.  All of the stereotypes and double standards were part of my discussion with my wife, and seemed to fall on deaf ears.  I have a close friend that can relate to the stress of everyday life and being a business owner.  He get's how it is impossible to get out of your own head even for a little while and truly relax.   I'm scared to talk about my "outlet" for stress for fear of losing a life long friend.  It's sad that falling into chemical or alchohol dependence to deal with stress is accepted in society but crossdressing is not.

I have felt that frustration too, Georgia! It's not fair that women get to choose from so many styles and fashions. Guy clothing is so boring and ugh! I constantly see well dressed women in dresses, skirts, heels, blouses and wish I could don those clothes myself. Wearing panties or hose under guy clothing helps. I think then that I am a woman wearing men's clothing! I'd lose my job too if I walked in fully dressed.

Ideal world: anyone can wear anything one wants, be anything one wants to be. For me, I'd then be in CD mode all the time. For now, I'm also my feminine self in the car ride to and from work!

Debbie, I couldn't agree more with your thoughts.  It is frustrating that we can see so many women do the FtM crossdressing and know that is what is going on.  I know of 2 women at my office that are obviously FtM and I am happy for them and jealous at the same time.  They wear their male jeans, polo or flannel shirts and have very short hair and minimizing bras.  If I were to go to work with a cute dress and 2" heels and a wig, look out.  So much gossip and I would undoubtedly get ridiculed as something I am not.  Weird double standard in this world to be certain.

We most certainly can't change who we are or what we want alot of times!  Be proud of who you are!

Some months, I feel so frustrated almost all day. I know it takes away from me being my best.

I find excuses to go shopping before work, at lunch time, and after work wearing flats or heels. I've met so many supportive sales people and other customers. And I feel so normal.

Then I go into work if get home, and I have to tuck my CD side away, frustrated by this suppression.

Georgia,

I am doubly blessed, first, I reside in an area that is very TG friendly, secondly, I own my own business. I go to work many days as Cookie. My clientel have never said anything, to my face. Thirdly, I look very feminine, and that helps.

I hope someday that the stigma of male wearing "Female" attire goes away.

Cookie. 🙂

2016_personal stories: Georgia Lane original post: 

CD has been a new path for me. I am sure that if friends and family knew they would say it’s because of my divorce and is a mid life crisis.  Don’t think it’s a mid life crisis but that I am taking time to figure out who I am and what makes me happy.  I am so frustrated that women can wear mens clothes without question but if a guy wears womens clothes he is usually subject to ridicule, comments, or worse.

I have an hour drive to work and usually use this time to be my female self and work on my voice.   Normally not a big deal to switch into guy mode when I get to the office.  Yesterday I was so frustrated that I had to do that though.  I so wanted to stay as Georgia.  Ughh.  Sometimes wearing panties under guy clothes, having painted toe nails, plucking my eye brows, and clear nail polish on my hands isn’t enough.

Anyone else feel this way?  I could go to work and announce that I am gay and that wouldn’t be a big deal.  Go to work with red nail polish, women clothes, and wig….   I would lose my job very quickly.