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Wow…I just had a roller coaster night as Holly!
I was all set to finally go out full fem…I even shaved off my beard tonight which was a HUGE step for me! I got dressed, did my makeup, looked in the mirror, and thought…hell no!!
Washed it all off, dressed in my manly attire, and went to drown my sorrows in a pint. Well…after 3 of those pints I was back at my room and seriously disappointed with myself. I thought about all of the courage the other girls on this forum have shared with me and I figured if they could do it, so could I!
I got dressed again in my tight jeans, sparkly blue platform heels ( I know, blend, but I couldn't resist!), a nice push up bra, and unfortunately a mens shirt but it was tucked into my jeans so it showed off my curves as best as I could hope. I went with my short red head bob look tonight with minimal makeup on…just mascara, lipstick, and simple con sealer for the beard shadow.
Well, I was scared walking down the hall…got in the elevator and almost turned back…got to the main floor and thankfully no one was there…I figured if I could get outside I was golden! I did…I walked to the darker area and promptly found my path blocked by a huge crowd of people! Ok…not going that way! Turned around and went to the main drag strip…bars, restaurants, and shops all crowded with people…granted it was pretty late by now, so mainly just the bar scene, but honestly I was mostly worried about them! I found courage in my cell phone. I figured if most teenage girls can walk around staring at it…then so can I! It sure helped me. I walked the entire strip…in my heels…with a nice wiggle to my hips I might add 😉 ...on a brick paved walk no less! I was on cloud 9! I wish I looked cuter, but I at least achieved the not noticed status.
I felt so good that at the end of the walk before going inside I stopped and leaned against a rail in a rather…um...provocative pose…sticking out my jean covered curves ( what little I have ) while leaning against the railing posting on my wall here. The next thing I know I realized that a guy had checked me out while passing me…again…not gay, buuut…that was quite the compliment to end my evening out. 😉 The only thing missing for me was a friend to share this all with. I noticed two girls ahead of me walking hand in hand and I was totally jealous. That was about the time I stopped to jump on this forum again.
Thanks to everyone on here for the encouragement and support! I can't tell you what a help it's been for me. ????????????
Holly
Congratulations Holly,that took guts,we're all really proud of you.Tell me afterward did you feel like you let yourself free ,I know I did after my first time out,that was after I finished shaking and hyperventilating HAHA.You keep going a enjoy yourself.LOL Hather
Yes I can relate to the shaking and hyperventilating 😋💖
I couldn't get the smile off my face afterwards though 💋💖😋
I just wanted to go back out again but honestly I wanted to have some girlfriends to go out with. I know it would have been more fun and I would have dared to do more like get a drink at a bar if I would have had some support to lean on💋
With someone who looks as good as you do, it would be an honor! MAybe when you make the move to the east coast....
I hear the upscale gay bars are the safest places to go. I know the ones I've been in in Portland have that feel. I hear the same about Seattle as well. Certainly going out with someone you know and trust would be the best, but sometimes that doesn't always work. It will come, in the mean time continue to bask in your victory. I know most of here certainly are. hugs