Walking Fashion Magazines

At the risk of maybe sounding a bit lecherous, I've always been one to check out women - whether at work, out shopping, moms on the sideline of a my kids' games, etc. From my perspective, there was always plenty to like - a pair of great legs, full bouncy breasts, a terrific smile, and so on. I don't (usually) stare, but if I like what I see I've never been opposed to stealing a second - or even a third - glance if possible. Walking behind a woman with a great derriere and terrific legs would be more than enough for me to slow my gait to match hers, no matter how annoyingly slow she was.

Over the past six months or so, though - ever since I came to grips with my gender fluidity and started paying attention to my feminine side - I find myself checking out the woman's physical traits much less and instead checking out her style. In male-mode, I'm a rather bland dresser. I wear the same pair of black loafer shoes to work every day, with a pair of black socks. I wear a slacks - almost always tan/khaki or black - and a golf shirt in the spring, summer, and autumn, or a sweater in the winter. The only jewelry I wear is my wedding ring - I used to wear my college ring as well, but my arthritis got bad enough a few years ago that I can't get it over my knuckles any longer.

Feminine me, though, desperately wants to break out of that dull, boring, gray world and explore. But, I spent 45+ years in that dull world and it's really all I know. If it's not a pair of black loafers or sneakers, I have no idea how to match shoes to an outfit. No clue how to choose jewelry. Not the first idea how to pick makeup let alone how to apply it. And on and on. But I've noticed the way I look at women has changed. Sure, I still admire sexy legs or beautiful eyes. I still love looking at large boobs. None of that has changed. But, I'm noticing other things. I realized the other day, for example, that I now regularly look at a woman's shoes - is she wearing flats or heels? Boots, wedges, sandals, pumps? What color, and how does that coordinate with the rest of her outfit? And it's not just shoes. I'm paying attention to how the women around me coordinate their outfits in general.

So, to all the women around me regularly - the ladies at work, moms at soccer games, people at the store, etc. - thank you for being a living fashion show for me. Thank you for helping, at least a little bit, to teach me about coordinating shoes and jewelry with an outfit, for letting me look at your hairstyle and how it relates to the shape of your face. Thank you for showing me how to mix and match colors. And if I ever made you feel like I was the creepy old guy staring at you, I'm sorry. I don't mean to stare; I'm just fascinated now that the veil of ignorance has been lifted from my eyes.