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Coming out

10 Posts
8 Users
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Posts: 149
Lady
Topic starter
(@skyler1090)
Estimable Member     Chicago, Illinois, United States of America
Joined: 6 years ago

So after a wild day today with my fiancé, things came down to the wire with my best friend and soon to be best man in my wedding next year. I came out to him. Not in a light way either. He knows I’ve been in therapy for a month or so now. I decided I wanted to tell him exactly why I’m in therapy.

My fiancé is in the hospital for reasons we won’t discuss here. She’s okay. Just getting better now. My best friend rushed to be by her side while I was at work. He’s seriously the best human being on the planet. I initially planned to come out to him tomorrow, but we got together after I got my fiancé settled in at the hospital.

Terrified because I knew he wanted me to talk to him tonight instead of tomorrow, we sat down and talked about her for a while. After a half hour or so, he mentioned that I had said I needed to talk to him about something important. Okay... here we go!

I decided to lead with the obvious. I’m in therapy blah blah blah. But what you don’t know is!

...shit... how do I say this.

Lets start easy. Hi! I’m bisexual and have hid that for the past 23 years of our friendship!

Okay that was easy. Let’s go further.

So you know how I’m in therapy? Cool. Wanna know why??? So here’s the thing. I have three things going on. One fuels the other two. I’ve been diagnosed with clinical depression and anxiety and then there’s the third thing. It’s a little scary for me to admit and I wasn’t sure how he would take it. He initially thought I was diagnosed with bipolar or something. Then I dropped the bomb.

I came flat out and told him everything. Shaking the whole way through. And by everything, I mean everything. I came flat out and admitted for the first time outside forums that I am transgender. Oh my god was that terrifying. It took every ounce of energy not to cry. When I looked up, the same guy I’ve known since pre k was sitting accross from me with the same warm welcoming glow. His reaction? He told me he is so proud of me and thinks I’m the strongest person he knows. He also said I’m the best actor he knows. Lol

we talked for hours about what being trans means to me and how far I want to take this. He assured me throughout the night that no matter what, he will always support me and be by my side through anything. He encourages me to make a full transition if I feel I want to. I showed him a picture of me as Skyler and he reacted with “Holy shit. You are beautiful! I’d have no idea you’re not a genetic girl.” He has told me that any time I want to hang out as Skyler, he’s completely open to it and just wants me to be me.

On top of everything, he reached in the closet and pulled out a gift wrapped box that has probably been there a year or so. He gave me an adorable pair of shoes he bought for his ex that happened to fit perfectly. Oh my god. Seriously. I’m on cloud nine. Granted, my mind is on my fiancé 110% right now and I’m worried sick about her. However, I never expected telling him this would go this amazing. Thank god for amazing friendships!

Anyone have any great coming out stories?? I’d love to hear them!

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9 Replies
Posts: 0
Guest
(@Anonymous)
New Member
Joined: 1 second ago

Good for you and your fiancee, Skyler.  Unfortunately for me, my coming out did not go well at all.

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Posts: 1351
Ambassador
(@elbereth)
Noble Member     Northampton, Massachusetts, United States of America
Joined: 7 years ago

Hi Skyler, thank you for sharing what is happening. I wish your fiance a quick recovery! It sounds like you both have a great friend in this person. I am very happy to hear that coming out to him went so well, congrats on taking that step!  It is an awesome thing to have that type of support. Hugs, Michelle

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Posts: 149
Lady
Topic starter
(@skyler1090)
Estimable Member     Chicago, Illinois, United States of America
Joined: 6 years ago

I never imagined this talk would have gone this well my when I brought up with my fiancé that I wa going to explain things to him, I expressed that I was absolutely terrified to know how he would respond. Her guess was that he would say something like “It’s about time you came out!” It wasn’t that enthusiastic lol but the reaction I got was incredible. Now if only I could get my family to be that accepting.

Yeah. Right....

A girl can dream right? Lol

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Posts: 4
Lady
(@sheerfulness12l)
New Member
Joined: 8 years ago

Great experience you just had, that's so Awesome! I'm really happy for you, must feel like a thousand pounds have been lifted off of you! I can only pray that I have the same outcome when I reveal my " True" self to my family and friends. I'm terrified of how they may react. But I'm so happy for you!

I'm new to CDH and want to make some new friends who are supportive and understanding! I would like hear more about you and your past experiences. Again, so happy for you, that is fantastic! Have a wonderful day and hope to hear from you, Peace

Michelle

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Posts: 2917
Managing Ambassador
(@ladyelly2957)
Illustrious Member     Kent, United Kingdom
Joined: 6 years ago

What a heart warming thing to hear so glad you have a true friend. Hope all goes well with your fiance. Hugs

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Posts: 129
Lady
(@janine)
Estimable Member     Winter Haven, Florida, United States of America
Joined: 9 years ago

Hi Skylar
Congratulations on coming out to your lifelong friend. It probably is the hardest thing that you'll ever have to do.
I think that it's awesome that he is so understanding and didn't criticize you for your choices regarding crossdressing.
I was on vacation last year and met a girl who I felt comfortable with.
So much so that I told her my secret about being a crossdresser
She like your friend totally understood and accepted me for who I really am.
The sky didn't fall like I thought that it would and I felt like the burden of my choice of being a girl was lifted off of my shoulders
We became friends and talked about our views on crossdressing.
We gave each other tips on how to apply makeup and how to make our bodies look feminine as well as many other things
Congratulations again on your admission of wanting to dress as a female
I'm sure that it's made it easier for you to become Skylar when you get the urge to do it.
Good luck with your girlfriend. I hope that she's as understanding as your life long friend is
Keep us informed
Janine

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Posts: 149
Lady
Topic starter
(@skyler1090)
Estimable Member     Chicago, Illinois, United States of America
Joined: 6 years ago

Hi Skylar

Congratulations on coming out to your lifelong friend. It probably is the hardest thing that you’ll ever have to do.

I think that it’s awesome that he is so understanding and didn’t criticize you for your choices regarding crossdressing.

I was on vacation last year and met a girl who I felt comfortable with.

So much so that I told her my secret about being a crossdresser

She like your friend totally understood and accepted me for who I really am.

The sky didn’t fall like I thought that it would and I felt like the burden of my choice of being a girl was lifted off of my shoulders

We became friends and talked about our views on crossdressing.

We gave each other tips on how to apply makeup and how to make our bodies look feminine as well as many other things

Congratulations again on your admission of wanting to dress as a female

I’m sure that it’s made it easier for you to become Skylar when you get the urge to do it.

Good luck with your girlfriend. I hope that she’s as understanding as your life long friend is

Keep us informed

Janine

See telling him I prefer women’s clothing was the easiest part. The hardest part was admitting for the first time out loud that I am a trans woman and want to transition. What surprised me most was his support and understanding of the situation and even his encouragement for me to seek HRT and eventually surgeries

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Posts: 0
Guest
(@Anonymous)
New Member
Joined: 1 second ago

Congratulations on a great start to move forward !

Lisa

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Posts: 121
Lady
(@mandycericross)
Estimable Member     Cheshire, United Kingdom
Joined: 6 years ago

That's pretty amazing Skyler! Well done girl and sounds like your friend is amazing. Hope your fiance is doing ok, Mx

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