Please advise

I'm pulling for you Connie.

Steph

Thanks, Steph! That's really nice of you.

Connie

xxx

Hi Jamie!

Oooo... can't focus much, eh? Yeah, me too along with so many others!

I'm at home getting some chores done before I head out to my cottage alone (plus spending too much time here, LOL). I just got a notice that my new winter tights and winter long-line cardigan has been delivered to my hideout. Very femme. I am now very efficient with my chores. I'm super-hyper now, but once I'm fully dressed I... just....calm.....down......! Ah.........!! (Got ADHD too, so that doesn't help!).

Here's a thought: I love wearing tights. I wear them as much as I can and in front of my SO, usually with a long T-shirt for some discretion. I've lately introduced one of my Lycra LBDs that is plain, simple and very wonderfully comfortable to match my black tights (sheer pantyhose in the summer).

I think my SO likes that "Baryshnikov" look. Trust me, I am NO Mikhail Baryshnikov, but at least I can wear my favourite things on the planet without grief. Is there a particular item you're additionally fond of that your SO can accept and then talk from there?

Just a thought...

xo Barb

Julie, hello, I’m Anya. I have no advice for you- just questions.
Given you have an accepting SO you are fortunate. This is not a common situation but one that we all seek. Would you say you are a patient person?
If so, I encourage tact and plenty of space for your partner. It could appear to your partner that they are doing the giving and you are just taking. You have shown that you are caring and you want to be open in your relationship. I would say you are well placed to maintain and sustain the trust you share. You said I don’t want to push-‘which may imply a little frustration?
Just keep sharing your gratitude and care. Keep your sims targeted towards your partner. Be sure you express your interest for you both.
In time I think you will discover a blending of views and desires. I don’t think you have anything to worry about.
Take it slowly, easy and be grateful for every small step.
I wish you every blessing.
Just my view, Julie, I’m just adding a thought.

Asnya

As other girls have posted, this is a common issue. When it came my time, I just asked her: Can I wear a nightie to bed?; Can I stay dressed around the house?; and finally "Can I wear a dress at home?" (She had a specific "thing" about men in dresses). I'm happy to say that permission was always given.

Hi Jaime cant add much to what these other girls have said  as my wife is very supportive and i never dress with out asking first she allways says i domt have to ask and i tell her that i will never take her for grantit .. So i ask she sometimes prempts me and says go find Stephanie  which is a wow in my heart good luck girlfriend time and patience is a key to getting there been married 38 years would never trade her in on 2 20s as she says im not wired for 220 he he hugs girlfriend..

Stephanie Bass

Hi Jamie, my partner & myself often have a girls night in, we start off with happy hour & then have a 2 course meal. We often have a theme to go with it like say formal dress, after 5, casual summer, race day fashion. Hope this helps.

Bottom line up front, just ask her if she would be comfortable with you dressing a little bit more around her.

All you can do is talk to your wife and see how she feels.  Go slowly though, I wouldn't recommend being in femme mode 24/7 instantly.

Your wife may not have a clue that you want more than you have just now (I certainly didn't) or she may be expecting it but you will never know unless you ask.

Set some time aside and talk.  Even if it means you have to give her some time to digest and then come back to the conversation in a day or a week, remember you have had time to think about what you are comfortable, she hasn't so she needs that time as well and then try and involve her, if she wants to be involved.

Hi Stephanie,

Thank you, good advice.  I am also trying the same. Always ask her permission.

Thank you Anya, will take it slowly

Having just come out to my wife three weeks ago we are still figuring out what  her comfort level. She does accept my crossdressing but isn’t sure how involved she wants to be.  She has a very positive attitude and is hopeful but in essence doesn’t want me counting my chickens before they are hatched.

Based upon it goes well and behind my expectations I asked my wife what did I do that helped her accept this.  There’s other factors but what she said what that I always said our marriage and relationship with her as a man was number 1. That we must always talk and not shut down. When you shut down the the walls start getting built.  Lastly you have you put yourself  in Her shoes not literally 😁 but that figuring this out is 50-50 not 90 percent me and 10 her.  I know we are hurting but it’s important that you take her perspective as much as your own.

Not sure if this makes any sense but it’s working for us

best of luck. Always think positive.  Good thoughts attract more good thoughts 🌻🌻

Go slowly and in stages.
I decided a little more than 2 years ago I was going to start dressing the way I wanted, wearing what I wanted. I started with wearing womans jeans. I know where them exclusively. Then migrated to wearing womans boots, (booties, the short stylish boots). I always wear womans underwear, which she does not see. Tights or some sort of hose.

I always wear mens shirts, although I would love to wear blouses. My wife has "accepted" this, realizing she can't do a lot about it. It has had an affect on our intimate relationship. There is none. Oh, and I have removed all of my body hair.

Your wife may come to accept this more, if you take it slow.

Good luck!
Rebecka!