Why do some of you hide.

Cos I live and love with someone who will not allow me to dress as Caty before I go out.

I have the confidence, the time and the $$$ to have makeovers and go out and I'd do it quite frequently if I could.

But I've had a broken marriage already, with being CD a major part of it and I aint going down that "mascara wand" again. Also its very selfish to impose"our" wishes on someone else if they are not comfy with it and to do so is just "rubbing concealer into the wrinkles".

Mine not her's!!!!

Caty

Fiona such well thought out points... It is a guide worth noting for all the ladies here...
The main point is safety... The best way to be out and about is with other friends cd/tg or not. I am fortunate there is a tg/cd venue where you don't owe anyone an explanation and share your feminine side with others. I plan to join them very soon... Thanks again Fiona for a great article...Leonara

Everyone's situation is different.  What is right for one person, can be devastating for another. It's easy to tell someone what to do. But remember we all are not the same.

Yours Terri

I think I look much better in Bianca mode than in my drab mode, I feel much happier, excited, more extroverted, feel I let my true self out. Love it and would love to do it full time. As most of us have, I have had my share of knocks, and my skin is thick enough to take any insults or taunts ignorant damaged bigoted people want to throw my way.

So why don’t I do it full time, simple, my kids, in their early teens.  Not so much how they would deal with it, I know our bond could not be broken by such a revelation. It is more that I do not want them to be exposed to insults about having a ‘tranny dad’ or Suchlike from above mentioned ignorant damaged bigoted people.

This overwhelming need to protect my kids trumps my desire to let the real me out.

Hope you all understand

love

Bianca

It is very understandable.We all want to protect our famalies and loved ones.The ridicule by friends and peers for kids.I have learned as I have aged,that I have become more understanding on alot of issues that others judge us for.I have a transgender person in my family that I never knew about until recently.My wife brought her to my attention.You know what,good for her,and good for all of us.We are becoming a recognized group that should be noticed.We are all human beings.I just wish I was as brave as some of you here.I am just so scared to take that first step and go out in public and be who I really want to be.Like I said before I hate judgemental people.The one thing I will say,when and if I make my first outing..........................I hope mister manly can handle a pair of my little size 7 Stilettoes in his sack for being a jackass if he makes remarks.Love all of you GIRLFRIENDS for just being who you are.TAMMY!

I have lived in my community for 30 years.  Although some do know I underdress, most don't.  I don't come out and stay in the closet as my many friends just could not handle it.  I feel it would hurt them and it would certainly cause a problem at my locals.  My brother is a homophobe and that would be impossible and I just wouldn't want to hurt my daughter who still sees me as her knight in shinning amour.  In the end, I have made the decision that the hurt it would cause others outweighs my want to do it.  However, I have figured out how I can have both.  I don't live far from a gay community and have made friends there.  It is a free zone, so I love to take the trip and am able to go out en femme there and limit my day to day just underdressing in my home town and around my relatives.

It is so understandable knowing what hurt or trouble it would cause with family and friends.I know where you are coming from.I have a brother that means the world to me and I would never want to break that friendship or bond.The same with my Daughter although I think she would be very understanding.It would be nice having a chance to get away like you do.Just having the chance to make new understanding friends would be so great.I have had more or less my first date with a male friend.It was here at home with him but it was interesting.I guess I am very lucky,my wife left Saturday night and told me to invite him over and have fun.So that is what we did.Thanks Jennifer and enjoy your private outings.Tammy.

I do create a beautiful illusion - but I do have a large Adam's apple, I am 6'2" without my 5" heels, and no real femme voice. I can be pretty and will attract visual attention. But I won't blend in unless traveling with a women's basketball team. I could use a turtleneck or scarf and sit and be quiet, but is that really worth the tiny risk of physical violence if some men are visually attracted to me and then get upset when I speak? If my wife would support me and go with me, I could do it, but she would toss me to the wolves if that happened.

Society currently depends on treating men and women differently - men you may shake hands with and women a peck on cheek. You get people upset when you confuse them as to how to properly interact with them. Men who are attracted to a man in a dress may feel you are making them think homosexual thoughts. But things are getting much better than 30 years ago.

Hugs, Ellen

I see all your points.It is just a srewed up society for sure.I did something a minute ago and really dont give a damn what my neighbors say or think.My wife asked me what in the hell I was doing?I went outside in my heels and hose and blouse and had a cigerette and sat on the porch in plain view.People don't like who I am the hell with them all,I dare them to say something.Thanks for your reply hon.Lets talk anytime,Tammy.

This is a great question - and one I have often asked myself.

There are lots of answers, so I won't give one for now, but I will share this;

Yesterday, a delivery man knocked on my door.

Nothing unusual in that - especially in the run-up to Christmas.

However, until yesterday I (Laura) would never have gone to the door and answered it.

The delivery guy's face and manners didn't give much away, and I surprised myself at how naturally I behaved.

I knew I looked good (not amazing, but you know when you've got the image right!).

I was wearing a lovely black floral dress from Alex, which I treated myself to when I got my last job, nude heels from Next which I wear in preference to any other pair I own, and tights, and my forms gave me an appealing but not overtly sexy. My wig was honey blonde, and a little ratty - and I had no makeup on, but had recently shaved, so no shadow.

It was an experience that made me (Laura) feel really alive - I'm still basking in the moment.

NB; There are no sexual overtones to this - I have only ever been attracted to females - and feel repulsed by males!

I wanted to share, because it's something I thought I'd never be able to do, or, if I did, that it would be awful, or I (or my man) would suffer horrible guilt or other bad feelings.

But we both feel great.

I hope this inspires someone.

:0)

Love

Laura

Thank you for your reply hon.It inspired me!This was my whole point that I was trying to get across.I am so happy for you and what you did.The confidence in doing what you did and answering that door and saying that here I am take it or leave it.I am me,I am beautiful.I know there are many situations that hold some of us back which is sad for us.So happy for you,keep living the life GIRL,Tammy.