Why don't they understand?

I think feminine women, want their husbands to be rugged individuals... the hero lumber jack type scenario. (Maybe thats a general sweeping statement.)

Women tend to get a bit catty at times and competitive about looks, clothing, makeup etc.  (Another general sweeping statement.)

Perhaps in the bedroom, the GG doesn't want to compete.

All I Know is for as long as I can remember, I loved wearing pantyhose and loved how my legs looked and felt in them. I also realized if I wore heels. my legs looked even better, so I loved wearing heels. I really wanted a dress too but that was not available to me so I wore shirts that looked like short dresses. I also thought bras were intriguing and I manged to borrow a few of them.

So from the time I was 4, I was wearing pantyhose, heels, bras and shirts that kind of looked like short dresses. I feel in love with sheer to waist pantyhose. At 13 I began buying my own. At 17 I saw Daisy Duke and was blown away. I wanted to look like her and be her. I bought some heels and short short, grew my hair longer and began going out in that attire. I even met several girls who liked my look.

At 18, I got my own place and went fully en femme. I bought all the wonderful and sexsy clothes I had wanted for so long.  I wore them all the time at home. I even got a few Daisy Duke style wigs  and began going out in my Daisy looking character. My real big public outing was a college Halloween Party. I was very nervous but was a big hit. I got lots of compliments on my legs, pantyhose and shoes. I was hit on quite aggressively by both guys and girls. I even met other CD's there. I partied and dressed with them often over the next 4 years. I even won "best leg" and "sexiest costume". I love it. In many ways it was lifelong fantasies and dreams coming true. I was fortunate to be able to do it a lot over the next 4 years. I loved it. I got hit on a lot and often got to enjoy many wonderful, erotic experiences.

But I wasn't hiding. I was putting myself out there. You like what you see? You want this? Well, what you see is what you get. I'm glad it went that way. I think hiding and then suddenly appearing as someone another person wasn't expecting can lead to all sort of problems. I was looking for fun, dressed for fun and had fun. No surprises.

It's very true.

We're misunderstood and mis-represented, largely. There's still just the large cloud of stigma over what we do as being, 'gay' and that's that. It's not open for re-consideration. It's a tough choice to make in this life. There are slowly more roads being paved in the way of acceptance and tolerance, but they're narrow.

In the end, most of it as far as we are concerned is all about appreciation of females and of the species itself. Few of us 'want' to be female, we just can't express an appreciation, physically any other way. It's complicated, I doubt it could ever be simplified, because it matters to each of us in many different ways and guises...

Thanks!

you said it right.  woman wear manly cloths and we can not wear female cloths? what yes we can and we do. and for a good percentage of men have a feminine side and they just don't know it yet  and yes females have the masculine side and they show it. they wear manly cloths every day and nothing is said.    so why dont real woman under stand the x dressing world, maybe they should look in the mirror and see what they see and have some one with them and tell them i see a woman dressed in men clothing< DA.  but some woman do under stand the x dressing world.   guess you can call it society,  this is the year 2020 and there is x dressers, transgenders, drag queens. some men dressed up as woman look really pretty and very passable.   some men have the body figure of a female.       don't  forget there is woman that look like a butch, some men that look like a woman.                                      woman marry woman and men marry men now days, its the new generation, the old generation has to learn to except the new generation.  just like computers, lap tops, cell phones us older people have a hard time with this new stuff and the newer generation know how to use them in seconds. when it comes to new high tech stuff i am lost but it takes time for me to learn it

So well said Jessica. As someone who is currently trying to finally come to some sort of arrangement with my wife, your words really and truly hit home. Especially now since she shows no sign of compromise or support. It is very difficult.😞 Thank you for posting this.

-Jen

Oh yes yes yes you have hit the 'nail on the head'. Why? One of life's great mysteries I guess...

Nope not fair at all not even the tiniest bit

Dear Jessica, woman, you are absolutely right, it is a great enigma that we may never be able to solve, my theory about it is that women confuse transvestism with sexual orientation, they immediately believe that for one to be a transvestite, it is immediately logical that we are gay by consequence, when the truth is that many crossdressers are heterosexual, without any trait of being gay or bi, with this I do not want to offend my gay and bi sisters, simply to highlight the fact that being a transvestite is not synonymous with homosexuality, but of a very feminine expressiveness but with nothing necessarily connected to our sexual orientation, just a very nice taste for the feminine world, lots of kisses and hugs to all my transvestite sisters, felicity

I personally think since they did not initially know about our crossdressing  before establishing the relationship there is a great deal of confusion and wonderment. A very common response from many women is: "I didn't sign up for this". There has to be a great deal of patience for both members of the relationship.

I have to say that "I didn't sign up for this" has to be one of the most unreasonable and common statements I've seen concerning cross dressing.

They didn't NOT sign up for it either.

It's not in the marriage vows, there is nothing to sign - it is a ridiculous statement!

Don't worry - I know it's not your statement, I am explicitly not having a go at you!

I have seen it too many times, and it's a bad way of thinking to my mind. It puts cross dressing into the category of something intrinsically bad, which it isn't.

Maybe it would be a valid sentiment the husband turned out to be a murderer - I think it's a given that no-one signs up for that, but for having exotic tastes in clothing and being a bit softer and nicer than the average macho bear stalker?

Per-lease!!!

It can be a shock finding out, but there are such things as rights, and patience, and discussion - and I hope that the transgender awareness message gets out to everyone in time for Christmas.

Love, Peace and understanding.

Laura.

"Why don’t our wives, fiancés and girlfriends understand us?"

They really are a selfish bunch aren't they? or should I say, We really are a selfish bunch aren't we?

Answers on a post card please.

Hi Jessica

What you wrote is so very true. I'm mtf transgender and have been crossdressing my entire life.When my ex-wife found out about me all hell broke lose, When she found out I'm cd-ing after our divorse, same reaction. And she is a nurse with a speciality in sexual counselling! So it looks like it's ok to be different as long as it is not happening to anyone close to you. And as for transvestite, to me the word is so deeply rooted as a very bad word, even if I'm one myself. Almost all my life I have battled with myself to accept that I'm trans. And finally it has happened. When I came out to my absolutely lovely coworkers, all girls, their all spontaneously said "But you are still you". And since then nothing has happened in my relationship with them, life goes on as if nothing has happened.

Love
Lily-Rose

Don't lumberjacks put on women's clothing and hang around in bars?

😁

Love Laura

Round my way, back in the late 1970s, that would have been like signing my own death warrant.

Good for you though - you hit the nail on the head, and I bet it wasn't an easy ride.

Love Laura

Gee maybe its just me, but if two people have had a happy faithful and trusting relationship, shouldn't a loving trusting wife continue to be so even after the husband comes up with the courage to declare he is a CDer?