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Well, I sort of went out and I made it back alright. I started seeing a therapist 8 years ago and go as I have need to do so. I took the bold step, for me, and dressed for a recent appt. I partially dressed for the ride out, bra, girdle, make up etc. but, wore jeans and a tee on top of them. When I arrived at the building I went straight to the bathroom, located in the practice's lobby. I finished by changing and brushing through my wig. My therapist was shocked to see me dressed, as she knows I am closeted.
We spent the entire session talking about my decision to dress for the appt. vs what I initially came to chat about that day. At the end of the appt., I thanked my therapist for her support and understanding then, I dressed down and drove home. I experienced so many emotions that day, as you can imagine. I'm still replaying everything in my mind! : ) I'm glad I did it, even though I'm not sure when or if I will again. If you're closeted, you know the risks of being outed. I am not advocating for you to do it nor am I saying you should not. But I survived ladies, you can too.
That was a very bold decision and happy for you that it went well. The way you did it was a very good way to go about it too. Did your therapist comment on how you looked for you to get a feel for acceptability?
To me it certainly moves you forward and perhaps for your therapist to adjust the sessions as it is clear you are determined to progress this.
Thank you for sharing as it showed you planned, prepared and indeed you survived!
Thank you for your kind and supportive reply Angela! She was shocked, as I mentioned. But she was very supportive plus, complimentary of my make-up and wardrobe choice (a sweater dress, ankle socks and pair of beige Nike sneakers). She let me know I can come to our sessions dressed anytime and that their practice is a safe space for all of their patients! 🤗 However, I told her I try to be realistic about my wardrobe choices. Because of my body frame size, I really don't pass.
So, the next best thing I try to do is mimic what many women wear daily. Yes, I have dresses, heels and lingerie but the average woman today is much more casual in their style of dress. I don't want to sound critical of those who want to "dress to the nines". You're free to dress as you feel like inside of yourself! But if you're looking to 'blend in', don't wear a pencil shirt and 5-inch stilettos to the supermarket.
Hi Jayne,
Congratulations on your decision! You’re right that it’s a huge thrill and delight.
Alice
Well done Jayne,
I went out En Femme the first time properly a few months ago, before that i went out a few times but very late at night, this recent trip out i went out from about 10 in the morning till about 4 in the afternoon, I got in my car and drove around the country side where i live, and guess what i lived i wasn't swallowed up by a black hole, it's a great feeling and I'm hoping to repeat it again soon,
Hugs Rozalyn X 🤗
Jayne -
How wonderful for you, hope you continue to do that.
I've done some of my therapy sessions dressed. My therapist has a private office and I am able to change when I get there. She has always complimented me on my outfit. There are times I will just wear some fancy earrings or necklace and others where I will wear a dress and heels. It is nice having her address me as Suzanne.
XOXO
Suzanne
While not exactly a therapist, I recently went to my monthly waxing session fully en femme. Her only comment was, "Wow! Lookin' good."
I know it felt absolutely amazing to be dressed up for your appointment. It can be difficult to go out dressed, we fear running into someone we know or being outed by teens or some butt hole. But knowing all that I still go out on occasions. Today I went to the Georgia Ren Fest dressed in a renfest skirt and top, no mask of any kind. I had basic simple makeup on and flats. When I arrived I couldn't believe how many people were there, there were thousands and the most I have ever seen at one. I parked, brushed my hair and walked to the show. I so enjoyed being out and about with other people, happy smiling and enjoying the breeze blowing up my hitched up skirt.
Was I brave for doing this...no not in the least, March of last year an Emergency doctor told me I would be lucky to see the morning sunrise. She told me that I would probably die tonight and should call my family. Massive lung blood clots, I survived and now I know I should enjoy what is left of my life the way I want to enjoy it.
My journey started with very small steps going outside dressed. I started with just stepping out on my front and back porch, then walking around my yard and taking the garbage bin to the road. From there I started to take some small trips then the Post Office. Since then I have gone to Disney World, shopping and even in 2020 a Buc-ees. That one scared me to death. I had to use the bathroom so I put on a mask and went to the ladies room. Have I ran into any bigots, yes once leaving Walmart but it turned out ok.
I will say this, when you finally walk down a mall walkway into a store, go to the ladies section and pickup a few items and then try them on...there is no other feeling better than finally being you.