Dressing Age-Appropriate
A wise, cross-dressing psychiatrist once wrote (with apologies to Oscar Wilde):
“The only thing worse than being viewed as a sex object, is NOT being viewed as a sex object.”
Amen to that, Sisters.
I understand that most of us dressers just want to go out and get our errands/events done en femme, in public, and not get hassled. Of course, a lot of us want to be noticed by others though, but in a good way. I appreciate making some heads turn, I really do, and ‘cuz I’m partial to long, blonde hair, I may get more looks. Do the clothes make the woman? I think there is a split responsibility: between the woman herself, how she is dressed, and how she moves in public; all three conspire to create an image that is either good, bad, or indifferent. Personally, I want to create a good image that others may enjoy as much as I do.
As far as dressing age-appropriate is concerned, I say that’s a certain measure of crapola. My prescription is: dress how you feel and enjoy it. I do not agree with age-appropriate dress codes that some sites/advisors try to force on people and that because I’m mature in age, I should “dress like a spinster school-marm”; no way. I let the mirror tell me what it thinks (and my wife, who always says my skirts are too short, to which I tell her, I don’t have any long skirts). As long as you toe the line of community standards and don’t look obscene, it is OK in my books.
Short, colourful skirts (I have a couple that are REALLY short) look gorgeous to me over pantyhose, and I have noticed the guys like ’em and the cis-women hate ’em. Chuckle. And I don’t think that makes me a chucklehead for saying so.
That brings me to acceptance. As I have read elsewhere, some feel that women are still second-class citizens and men are bred to “maintain the patriarchy” (good Lord!) even today; I think that is a crock o’you-know-what. Women are pretty well respected these days and this is not 1835 any more (well, perhaps they could start dressing better though, but so could men, but improving dressing standards is for another day). Some say we cross-dressers are frowned upon because women in general are frowned upon, but frankly I don’t see that here in Western Canada. I doubt it is much different in the UK, Deutschland or the good old USA. In fact, other dressers I know, say they are often treated better in public presenting as women. So there!
It is just fun to look pretty and be safe in public and let’s face it, in our culture, women are the attractive ones, if they dress nicely. Men in a tux or a nice suit look splendid, but there sure ain’t any colour and I love colours—as do most of us who dress en femme. Of course, I am speaking of general social conditions in public places. We all know there can be jerks out there and I say to any woman or CD, get yourself some self-defence training, it will never hurt. Until next time.
Cheers, gentle ladies.
Fatima
You go Fatima. I’m 76, and when I go out to the clubs I like to dress to kill. I have everything from floor length gowns to wear with 5″ stilettos and mini skirts to wear with knee high 4″ stiletto boots, or even thigh high. (I love stiletto heels, even my slippers are 3″) I’ve remained active throughout my life so I’m not in bad shape, been told I have nice legs, and pass for being in my 50s. I love new styles, the new flair legs are just awesome, and where ever I normally go people watch just… Read more »
Yes I agree that cis women do feel the competition and not all like it. But why should we MtF dressers not dress nicely even if it does show them up. Maybe we can raise standards in public. Thx for your comment.
a slight deviation from the general topic to relate my experiences.Weekly I attend the same place for music.Best description would be a fancy nightclub .Over time a lot of folks tend to “dress down"-the men even more that the women.I, on the other hand “dress up"-more so than about 95% of the women. I mean pearls,heels, maxis bordering on gowns.Over the past few years I have received numerous compliments from women. I always think-why don’t you go for it and not look so sloppy or dowdy(i.e. age appropriate)?
Yes, I don’t get age appropriate at all. Usually I feel about 30 in spite of my 73 chronological stat. No way I’m dressing like a spinster school marm…..
I totally agree. I am 74, and pass much younger. I wear what I what for the situation. I dress to be me and that is often to be free and enjoy life as much as I can.
In my view skirts can never be to short, the only thing in life that is too short is life itself.
Yes to that Hun.
Thanks for this great article Fatima! I’m with you all the way in poo pooing any kind of age appropriate dress code. What I do is dress for where you are going, and what the event is. My dress style has also evolved somewhat, as now I’m not so afraid to dress boldly, and attract a bit of attention, as I did on the weekend. See my pic which was posted here today, I got a seemingly endless stream of compliments on my outfit, and almost all of them from women. As Emily said, I too have short shorts and… Read more »
yes it is fun to dress to attract some good attention. I just can’t get used to dresses below the knee, lol. So mine are short and my skirts even shorter. Thx for the comment.
I’m with you girl. I’m 74 and I still wear mini skirts, mini dresses, short shorts and so on. I do have some midi dresses but not many. Besides CDH I have friends on Facebook and Flickr. When I start correspondence most ask my age so I always say “how old do you think I am?". Most of the guesses say mid to late 40’s. Even here at CDH when I joined the Over Fifty group I posted a photo and Lenora sent me a message saying “there’s no way you’re over fifty. So to make a long story short… Read more »
On seeing this article, l immediately thought of you in regards to its being something right up your alley 🎳 for comment. Glad to see you didn’t disappoint, Trish!!!!
Marian ❤️
I absolutely agree with you Girl. Me? I’m 73 going on 34. LOL. Love my miniskirts and blonde hair. Good on you!
Absolutely, if you have it flaunt it!!!!!
Thank you for this article Fatima! I agree with what you have said here. I’m in that upper age group as well and I don’t feel like dressing like my age, ever! All the comments directed at me when I’m out have been positive and others have been compliments. So I think if we keep on doing what we’re doing, we’ll be fine! Just need to watch out for the zombies! lol!
Thanks again and take care! Hugs, Steffy
Totally agree with you. I love to go out with my girlfriends and show off my wares. LOL. Thx for the comment.