#378173
stephanie plumb
Participant
Registered On: November 17, 2018
Topics: 78
Replies: 698
Has thanked: 793 times
Been thanked: 2070 times

I’m completely with you on this one Laura.  I started my ‘going out dressing’ by trying to blend in, to not draw attention to myself, by wearing sensible clothes  in dull or muted colours, dressing my age,  hiding as much as possible, turning my face away from people, and heading for the hills if they came too close.

Hiding in plain sight?  I now do this all the time, by wearing whatever I choose and carrying it off with confidence.  My logic goes like this:-

People expect to see a female wearing a bright red summer dress.  They do not expect to see a man wearing a bright red summer dress.   So they see you as being female.

And it works!  It really does.   But you know this already. It was a huge revelation to me when I discovered that hiding in plain sight literally means that.  I’m not drawing attention to myself. I am behaving exactly as they expect a female to behave.   I’m under the radar.  Not raising the ‘man in a dress’ alert.

I sashay past them with a flounce in my step and a smile on my face, and hardly get a second glance. More often a smile or a nod.

It raises an interesting point.  A man stomping around in a granny dress and wellies, on a summers, day stands out.    A well presented CD’er, dressed appropriately (no, not age related) on a summers day  may not ‘pass’ (horrible term ), but blends in with everyone else and will be more acceptable.  In other words, they know or suspect that I am a man, but I am dressed and behaving as if I am a woman. So that’s alright then.

And anyway, as my post shows, age is only discernible at very close quarters, and if one keeps a little distance no one will know. And they don’t care anyway.

Stephanie P.

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