Sorry to hear your problems, Both of you Nicole and Melanie. Between my own experience and everything Iv’e read on CDH you are not alone. Many here have had similar experiences and from what I hear the SO forum here is just packed with valuable wisdom.
The only other great piece of wisdom I can pass along is my response after a counseling session with my now X. I told her ‘ if I win WE loose if you win WE loose, the only way WE win is each of us have to give of ourselves so WE will win.
It seems to me you both love each other deeply and that is a good start. It is good to see that you Nicole, are at least somewhat accepting. Melanie , please don’t push to hard, I know how you feel, give me the ok to CD here and there then you want more ( I know , it seems I can’t get enough – seems like the only thing I can think of is going out again ). I am sure that your feelings and thoughts, Nicole, are all over the pace so please Melanie be sensitive to her. KEY — communicate – communicate -communicate.