Thank you for your response.
My motivation is simply to have her understand a little more what it is like to be me. So that she is a little more accepting, and if she finds something lying around (and I have an unfortunate habit of that happening), it doesn’t cause her more anguish.
I do not want to dress in front of her. That is one boundary I don’t think we will ever cross. And I accept that condition. Actually I don’t think I would even if she says it’s okay. To start with I would be too embarrassed, and I know she would be uncomfortable. No, Stephanie is ME time and I could only ever share her with my wife if she was 100% accepting – and talked me into it. Which is very unlikely.
What I would like however is to be Stephanie in private with a little more freedom, and for my wife to say it is okay with her as long as I am discreet, and just laugh it off if I leave something lying around.
I am locked in my head. Stephanie would love to be accepted by her alter ego’s wife as another non threatening personality within the relationship. Interestingly we have a gay daughter and my wife is completely okay with that, as am I. Why then can’t she accept me as I am? I am still the same person she married.
In other words I am just looking for a way for her to accept me as the femme person I am in addition to being her husband.
I just need the words to allay her fears and encourage her to be more comfortable with me.