(A lot of posts that I need to take time to read but I feel a strong urge to reply my self)
I been interested in crossdressing at different levels since early teens. In the beginning I collected a small pile of stuff that I purged with each move I did.
Then marriage, kids and life became more important so the cd had to be on the back burner for a long while. I still had a few things that I used now and then but it could be months between each time.
Now I’m older (>50) and kids moved out I feel the urge much stronger. In 2018 it was strong enough that I did dare the step of joining CDH. For that I felt the need to come up with a name for my female side and I picked “Kelly” because I wanted something unisex. (the good part with that is that when I talk to my wife I can talk about “Kelly” instead of “when I crossdress …”)
Just this last years I have left the closet more and more. Earlier I had the fear of being caught as Kelly but now when I’m older I don’t really care to much any more if family or friends find out about Kelly, and I almost hope it will happen, then I have more freedom.
Is to why now – probably several things already said like hormone changes, more time, more secure with my self and such but really – why try to analyse it? I just think that the easiest way to deal with a temptation is to fall for it so now I enjoy exploring Kelly as much as I can.