I’m answering this as the question was posed and really want to make it clear that this is how I feel for me/us. I am the CD husband and the feelings you have described have been voiced here in a similar way (without the question).
I’m afraid that I’m still old school about your question. I love my wife as much now as the day we married, and find her incredibly attractive. I’d be heart-broken if she suggested that finding satisfaction with someone else was the way for her, and a solution to our relationship. I have, and would never do that to her and can’t imagine her suggesting it.
Having said that, I do not know if our relationship would survive this revelation or not, but it would hurt immensely.
Every relationship is unique and I have known people who would jump at your suggestion… I’m just not one of that number, but you and he need to find something that works for you.
-Molly (feeling that I should be signing as my male name)