Good Morning Grace,
great question! My wife knows I am a CD and you know that I push the boundaries with her. So I wear some degree of female clothing all the time; always underdressed and most of my clothes are androgynous.
I’m not sure if I truly understand women more. I certainly make a much more concerted effort to be more understanding, more empathetic, to be a better listener, to be a strong supporter. I do all this not because I understand her better, but because I want her to be more supportive of me as a CD. Like the time I was doing some plumbing while wearing bright pink panties – you guessed it, of course they showed while I was bent over under the sink and she saw them but she didn’t rant about it. And she’s never said anything negative about my femme skinny jeans. There’s a common saying that to understand someone, put yourself in their shoes. Well if I put myself in my wife’s shoes, or even clothing, I wouldn’t get to wear some of the feminine clothes that I wear. I don’t think she owns anything pink; my wife wears mostly blue and gray t-shirts/sweaters with blue jeans (non-skinny).
I suppose because I make such a concerted effort, and, I imagine other CDs with spouses who know, also make a strong effort and are more sensitive to the needs of our SO, it might be viewed as being more understanding. And I suppose I can go along with that. Sounds good anyway.
Take care, Big Hugs, Krista.