As much as you know,or think you know, someone it could all go wrong. It is a big risk you have in telling someone. Clearly you are in this process and have had some positives so you look forward.
Think of the five W’s. Who, What, Why, Where and When. Who to tell, What purpose does it serve to you, Why are you saying it, Where is a good place and when.
I have outed to many people over the tears so here’s my example.
I wanted to tell a person at work.
Who? A colleague who I had worked with for years and she had confided a few things with me that I had to keep to myself. I knew a lot about her and she me – except the dressing. She would often ask about my personal life and was miffed why I had not been married as she opined I would make a great partner. I felt I could trust her.
What purpose – To come out more.
Why – To answer a question she had as to why I wasn’t in a relationship.
When – Within a week of making the decision and arranging the time.
Where – A coffee shop in a garden centre we had been to before, outside of work.
I thought about the meeting and said I had something to tell her and she realised it was important and that in my doing so lessened the chance of me turning back. I thought I would take some photos with me and then I had a rush. I turned up dressed! She was waiting outside and I walked right up to her and it took her a short while to realise who it was. Then it was smiles, a big hug and long chat. She never disclosed the secret at work only suggesting, with my approval, others to tell. Not one of the others said anything and it was one of the best things I have done.
At that time I was very comfortable with myself and had a high level of confidence as I had been through the process with family, some neighbours and a couple of very trusted friends.
If you feel you need to come out about yourself more there is a need to exercise caution and realise that there are people out there who look as if they would be accepting but are quite the contrary. In life there are risks and if we didn’t take one or two we wouldn’t get far. Just assess before going forward and who knows.
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