by dressing secretly, I am not being fair to or honest with my wife
*Don’t dress secretly if it upsets you. Don’t do anything that upsets you unless you need to.
*Actually, it’s fine to have secrets, everyone does. What’s not fair is forcing soneone to be something they are not.
staying up late to enjoy Stephanie time is depriving me of sleep, and is not healthy
Don’t stay up so late. There are other solutions. Lack of sleep is unhealthy, but lack of femme time is not healthy, if you need it, unhealthy if you suffocate it, and a demonstrable health benefit if it’s a means of self expression that you need.
Stephanie is a real threat to the marriage in which my wife and I vowed to be until death
*Not true. Attitudes and misguided, uninformed perceptions are the threat, not the femme side.
Stephanie detracts me from my roles as a man, a husband and a father
*Why? Laura enhances my abilities in all those departments.
God made me a man and I have a duty to be the man He wants me to be.
*God judges not on appearance. This is the final and most positive truth that you can verify in the New Testament.
*You can be a “man”, whatever that means, and dress how you like – this is a fundamental truth.
*By giving up your femme side, are you being the man God wants you to be, or the man your wife wants you to be? She fell in love with you, not your jeans or suit. You probably wore different outfits since you met, and so has she. Appearance does not make the biological sex.
I am sorry you decided to leave, truly.
But the reasons here read like old wives tales and a desperate attempt to escape from who you really are.
Much love Laura.