Hey! My name is Chris I’m 22 from England, I’m currently struggling with my identity and I know I love to be feminine and have dressed as a girl once before but I felt so ashamed and threw away everything away I bought to dress up like makeup, wig, underwear. I only dressed up in my room and tried to wear make up twice but did a terrible job even tho it felt empowering and I loved being feminine but I was scared my parents who are quite closed minded would find out and I was ashamed and scared what would happen if they did find out. I can’t keep the way I feel inside anymore and I really want to become more feminine and dress but I need some advice on a number of topics 1. How do I keep it a secret? 2. How do I make my body more feminine 3. And how do I choose a name for my female self. Thanks for any advice in advance.
Feeling ashamed isn’t something you should ignore. It’s your conscious telling your mind something. It’s that gut feeling that shouldn’t be ignored. Deep down you’re ashamed. But you don’t want to feel that way. I get it, 100%. 99.999999% of society doesn’t agree with men trying to be women. That’s normal. And nothing us gurls can do to change it.
So, you either keep it to yourself, or you find like minded friends who enjoy crossdressing and do it with them.
I have done both. Had a good friend who I used to visit and CD with. We really enjoyed having someone we could se face to face, and relate to about how we enjoyed feminizing ourselves. And once that day(s) was over, we could go back to being our normal manly selves.
We didn’t have to rearrange our entire lives, didn’t have to seek acceptance from our loved ones. And we didn’t get so far into it, that there was no going back. Kept our options open, as they say. And it worked our for the best.
Being young, you probably have times you want to scream your secret at the top of your lungs to the world. Been there. Done that. But there’s been many MANY more times that I was glad I didn’t.
You’re old enough to have your own place, so I assume you do. If not, then I suggest you do. The freedom of that in itself is amazing. To dress how you want, practice your make up for as long as you want. You’ll have an address where you have have clothes shipped straight to your place, discretely. And, if you find other CD or trans friends, it’ll be a place to have get togethers. A gurls-night-in.
Hope this helps.
P.S. If you enjoy the relationship you have with your loved ones, think long and hard about changing that relationship. Once you come out, it will change. Most times, it’s not always for the better. Subtle questions with your parents might help you decide. Like bringing up the subject to them about other crossdressers and trans people. Listen to what they say. If they favorable, jokingly say something about you dressing as a woman.