Welcome April! Thanks for sharing so much of your story with us. It is so familiar and esp when I was young, I too went through years of thinking I was the only one like this, then discovered the TV word, which totally horrified me.
Of course this desire never goes away and slowly I learned to accept myself, as you have done. Now I’m so much happier to be able to express my inner woman, though I still have old male me who is going to stay around as well I think.
One thing your therapist said makes sense to me too. My personal example is I have been drawn to play and create music since even before I started dressing up. So no one ever asks me why I want to play piano? It’s the same as my alter ego Amy, it’s just part of me and no real reason can be found.
I’m glad you’ve come to this point of self acceptance. There are lots of great girls to meet and chat with here. Joining this site, for me helped me learn to fully accept my feminine side.