It’s very common that within the framework of divorce and seperation we develop an attitude that (for want of a better term” a Spirit that causes rejection.”
In other words we do things that we know (conscience of subconscious) that will cause others to reject us.
Sometimes we can enter marriage and relationships with this attitude which dooms us to destruction.
Some people for some perverse unknown reasons get a high on this perpetual destructive cycle.
Others truly want off that merry go round. Having experienced divorce myself, its important to develop safe networks. My wife and I are conservative Christians. She knows about my dressing. And I / we are ok about setting boundaries with her and community regarding it.
Cding wasnt an issue when i went through my divorce.
Anyways. The reality is, you need to form networks that you can comfortably work with and not try and force issues.