Quest to know the female experience
About the title not so much the intro itself
I grew up with sisters and always wondered how it would feel to be one.
In early years, it was about the clothes.
I still totally like the clothes, but over recent years I’ve enjoyed thinking like a woman, or at least how I think women think.
My friends including those that don’t know are almost entirely GGs.
Twenty-five or so know directly and there are a lot of women who have seen my pedicures, manicures and brow waxes and surely inferred what’s going on.
After the story is shared, we have lots of talks about how they do things, leg shaving, fixing hair, nails, even what kind of panties work for my shape. I suppose it is like becoming a sister.
One is a serious feminist,others are old enough, 50s and up, to be “tired of all this crap” especially from stereotypical men.
I’m realizing how the established gender roles are an obstacle for everyone, and how that has held me back from almost anything that might even suggest I dress.
I see the treatment from men that attacks their worth and intelligence. I have had experiences with male managers and coworkers that make me miserable. I don’t hate men, except the arrogant blustering ones.
And being a crossdresser makes me even more threatened.
I’ve been made even more aware of male privelege by them. The “advantage” I have and the continual fear of what all these conventions could do to me.
Pockets? Why don’t women get pockets?
So one day I go out on the yard wearing leggings and a long sleeve t-shirt.
No pockets, fairly new manicure. Nowhere to put my phone, chapstick, pocket knife.
So I put on gloves and get one of those little gift bags for a purse.
I sure get the pocket thing now. I used to think women were silly when they said, It’s hot. “I need to put my hair up off my neck. Or I can’t do that, I’ll break a nail”
And I see how even just putting on mascara and lipstick makes it longer to get ready. Especially mascara. I’ve just started wearing that to town.
Our lunch get togethers are with 2 of our closest friends. I’m the only guy there, and especially if I have on panties, I absorb the ladies’ lunch vibe.
All that’s a thrill, but more importantly a validation that I’m accepted.
As my friend said, “You’re lucky. You know both sides of gender, and can understand women better than other men can.”
Conversations about femme things, including what I wear and what I’d like to wear.
And acceptance of all of me.
What liberation from all those years in hiding!
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