ADHD has been a part of my family traits for several generations along with being Intersex and being on the mildly autistic scale also. I have participated in studies regarding all this. We have been great inventors, creators, artists, problem solvers etc. but also tragic in our relationships. I taught our children to understand that we speak and live a life and language unlike 98% of the world and that if they wished to survive and thrive in the (so called) normal world that they needed to learn that language and those habits. It is like being isolated in a french speaking country and only speaking english. So to avoid being ostracized and ignored, you must learn french also. When people speak to me, I see cartoons floating down from the sky pertaining to the things that they are saying. Their words become a 3D animation. Also, in many cases I am lightyears ahead of them in my thoughts as they speak and then get bored because it’s taking so long to say what I already know. I am super hypersensitive to any stimuli and can detect a dripping faucet 3 rooms away from me or can tell if you changed detergent or deodorant. I love the Las Vegas Strip because I can actually feel the electromagnetic pulse (I call it neon bathing). I don’t stim (finger tap, hum etc.) but have learned how to look people in the eye without overpowering my mind. I do dance and talk with my hands. I’m always in motion. My sensory life is like being in a room with 25 televisions all turned on at the same time to different stations and set at loud volumes. I had to learn to cancel out all the background noise and colors in order to concentrate. I can now will myself to fall asleep in 45 seconds. When I was a child I was considered weird and had few friends (again the two different languages theme). I couldn’t understand why they didn’t get me and I didn’t get them. After a particularly devastating divorce I spent 10 years in therapy with an absolutely wonderful psychologist who helped to explain my differences and to learn to live in the neurotypical (the normals?) world. She explained it to me, and here is her short version. In prehistoric time nature favored an individual that could detect the slightest variations in conditions. This would allow for more successful hunts (could smell or hear the game or enemy better etc.) and provide greater protection and survival. In modern times these gene structures have not been as prevalent and now makes up less than 2% of the population. The other 98% think as a group in patterns that are quite different. Anyway that explanation made sense to me as to why I was different. Maybe it’s somewhat like left handedness vs right handedness. They both function, just differently. I don’t take any medications to manage all this but some of my family members do. I joined CDH and TGH to share what I know and hopefully help others and so I share this information with you. For most of my life I would just stealth out and mix in with the normals and try not to be detected since it weirds people and has usually resulted in unfavorable backlash and isolation. Knowing what I know now, I find my life to be happy and rewarding. I understand and celebrate all my diversity and usually blend in.
Thank you Marissa for this thoughtful forum topic and also thank you Jocelyn for your excellent additions.
Safe Journey, Marg
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