Suzanne Martin
Registered On: January 8, 2020
Topics: 2
Replies: 185
Has thanked: 913 times
Been thanked: 620 times

Karli –

My situation is similar.  When I first came out to my wife she had a hard time understanding and had a lot of questions.  I did the best I could to answer them, and to this day questions continue.  She felt betrayed and lied to which I understood and still do.  Weboth see therapists separately and will discuss what we are comfortable in sharing from our sessions.  She has attended a couple of my sessions which helped me to understand some of her feelings and her to understand mine, but not something I would do again.  We still have some rough spots but are able to talk and work through them.  I still dress only at home when she is not present.

I have found therapy to be very helpful and started at the recommendation of my wife.  I think any therapy would be helpful.  I would suggest individual therapists for each of you and a separate therapist for both of you together.  The reason I say this is that I find it easier to be open in my individual sessions as there are some things I don’t want to discuss in front of my wife.  I think some of that is from hiding throughout my life, not only from others but also from myself.

I hope you find this helpful.


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