Helene –
I understand what you are saying, thank you for sharing. When I first told my wife of my dressing she asked if I was gay/bi, which I told her at the time no. Since then and thru therapy I have admitted to myself that I am bi, but that is another discussion. She said she didn’t want to see me dressed and that I couldn’t take it out of the house. Since that time it has been quite the roller coaster ride. We have gone from acceptance in her own way to having to stop to mild acceptance. At one point she thought it was a phase I was going through. I explained to her that my dressing helped me deal with stress and connect with my softer side. She doesn’t want to see me dressed, but will have me try on clothes so she can make sure they fit right and give me tips on how to wear things. She bought me make up and showed me how to use it (was fun having her put it on me and explain what she was doing). She helped me pick out and buy my wig and recently helped me buy some jewelry at a craft fair.
When I first came out to her I started looking online for support groups and found this site. I told her about it and she looked at it. She said that some of the pictures she looked at she would never have guessed they were men (quite the compliment). She said she didn’t think it was for her and that I needed to remember our agreement about not taking it out of the house. Needless to say I have been here since that time and as much as I would like to share this site with her I am hesitant to do so. As you have said I don’t want her to see what I have posted as it could/would make things difficult.
In the end we must each do what we are comfortable with. Only you know your wife and how she will react, just remember that once the genie is out of the bottle there is no getting it back in. Best of luck with whatever you decide.
XOXO
Suzanne
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